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Four weddings and.........

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Health & Wellbeing
Help needed please.

Firstly, I'm rubbish with clothes generally, and I'm definitely not taking the fashion queen approach but my brain is thoroughly fried so I'm hoping you can do the thinking for me.

It's my uncles funeral on Thursday, I'm currently trying to work full time and do a fair amount of looking after his wife and two children, so majorly short on time.

It's the age old what to wear question. Definitely doesn't need to be black, and probably should definitely not be all black but I can get away with a bit. I'm playing some music at the front, so need to look vageuly appropriate, but also be able to move my arms easily - so my suit jacket is out. And doing a poem and prayer with my 9 yr old cousin, who I think current plan is going to we wearing a denim skirt.

Any suggestions? I work in an office, so have standard work type clothes. And can just get to the shops at lunch time if I know what I want.

Ideas?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would wear something black/dark and smartish/smart casual, and wear something youve already got, because the only important thing is that youll be there, paying your respects. Noone will be looking at what youre wearing at all, unless its scruffy or disrespectful. I would probably wear a work suit if it was me, or a black skirt/trousers and black top
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    OK, brain fry showing through.

    Suit is out because I can't play the recorder in my suit jacket.

    I'm not quite sure whether black is ruled out completely, or just not all over black. I'm going with the two daughters who are 9 and 19, and are very anti black.

    I'm not out to buy a special outfit, but equally a suitable top to go with a work skirt, or something to majorly smarten up my denim skirt to go along with the younger one and I sorting out clothes together are definitely options.

    I currently own this skirt
    http://www.joebrowns.co.uk/sp+Womens-Bargain-Cheap-Skirts-Dresses-Sexy-Hitch-Skirt+LS139

    Which is black, but also kind of fun, so I thought maybe with some kind of suitable top and my dark green suede knee boots it might work ok. The sexy descrption is a bit misleading, it's just below knee length.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What are his family like? Do they expect everyone to be Requiem Black or is that the absolute opposite of what he'd have wanted at his funeral?

    The skirt would be OK if his family like funky things, but otherwise I think it might be a wee bit too casual. The idea of the top and the boots sounds good though.

    I suppose you know them better. You know what they'd be offended by. It does sound like his daughters want to have more of a celebration of his life rather than a mourning of his death, be guided by what they're wearing. If he was the sort of man who'd be aghast at black suits at his funeral, avoid them.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    To put things slightly more into context, the only way his wife and his parents are really speaking to each other is via me, his clothes for the coffin are jeans and a rugby shirt and I've done a significant amount of the arranging of the funeral service.

    (spot why I haven't been at chat recently :p )

    Suit is definitely not required, and not wanted by his immediate family (wife and daughters), but grandparents generation of relatives will all be there so in the interests of keeping my loved by all family diplomat and peacekeeper what I wear needs to be considered appropriate by everyone.

    : banghead :
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wore a long black cardigan with dark trousers and a purple t-shirt for my Grandad's funeral and that was considered ok. That would give you enough movement, as well.

    What are you going to be playing?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Playing 'Eagles Wings' as a recorder and flute duet. I play the recorder, she plays the flute.

    It's not massively well known, but if you know modern Catholic music then you might just know it. Tis beautiful, we're playing an arrangement through once then got the organ and congregation joining in.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Scary Monster wrote: »
    Playing 'Eagles Wings' as a recorder and flute duet. I play the recorder, she plays the flute.

    It's not massively well known, but if you know modern Catholic music then you might just know it. Tis beautiful, we're playing an arrangement through once then got the organ and congregation joining in.

    I know it. Lovely choice.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Cheers. I really like it, despite having been up very late last night trying to sort out the arrangement. just hoping that I can still enjoy it from now on, but prettu sure will because its so good.

    think I've now got evrything on my to do list in hand, now its just to do it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If the family are not bothered about the formal black thing, then as long as you are 'church smart' (as my mum says) I wouldn't worry about it too much. If it's something you'd feel comfortable wearing for a normal mass, then go for it.

    I think the outfit with the skirt and the boots sounds nice. Maybe you could wear it with a smart jumper or blouse (I know 'blouse' makes me sound about a hundred, but you know what I mean - like a bit more smart and feminine that a shirt shirt) :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know exactly what you mean by blouse. My current plan is a smart, office wear type sccop neck fitted t shirt type thing.

    I'd wear a blouse but my arms are the wrong shape and they never fit, and definitely not enough to wave arms around whereas t shirt/top things stretch. ;P
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sounds perfect
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well that one's sorted, and ticked off the to do list. Now to get the rest out of the list sorted. I think I might add world peace to it, would put something relatively achievable on.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wore a black dress to the last funeral I went to however it had little small white polka dots on it. and it wasn't sexy or low cut or anything, it was quite vintage looking actually. and some black pumps, blazer (though I only wore the blazer cos I was fat back then) Everyone said it was fine, majority did wear office type stuff though.
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