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Reaction to a criminal charge

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
It would be hard to cut out somebody that was that big of a part in my life so i wouldn't run a mile, i'd stay and support him/her throughout it but also make it clear that i dont at all condone what he/she has done and wont have any sympathy for the punishment they receive.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What's the 'something' that he's supposed to have done?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Meh, if he didn't kiddy fiddle and just possibly was looking at dodgy cartoon porn, I wouldn't give a fuck.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont think you can possibly decide until you have all the facts from both sides, i think i would need to see the images to judge him.
    That said i would hope the people in my life would believe in me and stand by me if i was innocent.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katralla wrote: »
    Meh, if he didn't kiddy fiddle and just possibly was looking at dodgy cartoon porn, I wouldn't give a fuck.

    :yes: Pretty much how I'd feel too.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wrote:
    Well, his version of the story (which is the one I'm working on for the time being) is that a child made an allegation that he touched him inappropriately. That I'm pretty confident is not true because the dates and details of the allegation just don't work. However police obvious took his laptop and iPhone and claim to have found images on that. He's fessed up to me he looks at porn occasionally - no real surprise there, including cartoons which seems to be where the problem lies. Apparently drawing or photos equates to the same thing. Ergo Bart Simpson cartoon take off, equate to indecent images of children.

    If he's telling you the complete truth then the whole situation must be fucking awful for him. And if it is the case that the kid is totally bullshitting and it the police have just found some dodgy cartoon porn, then I'm with the the others who say they wouldn't give a fuck if it were their partner.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wrote:
    I guess my response is pretty clear, I'm sticking by him, tears and all at the moment. It's helped to know others may do the same and I'm not being a complete mug.

    *hug*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wrote:
    I guess my response is pretty clear, I'm sticking by him, tears and all at the moment. It's helped to know others may do the same and I'm not being a complete mug.

    You're not being a complete mug.

    His version of the story is all you know, so that's what you've got to judge him on. If it turns out not to be entirely true, then maybe that would be the time to reassess. Right now I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wrote:
    You're not being a complete mug.

    His version of the story is all you know, so that's what you've got to judge him on. If it turns out not to be entirely true, then maybe that would be the time to reassess. Right now I'd give him the benefit of the doubt.

    :yes: Personally, I would stand by him and like Kaff says, decide what to do if and when the truth comes out.
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    Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    If it was somebody I trust, I'd keep trusting them unless they're proven to have lied. In which case I'd hate them both for what they're accused of doing and for lying to me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would be surprised if he was charged with having indecent images if it's just based on cartoons like the Simpsons.

    I guess the answer really depends on how well you think you know this person. If you are confident that you trust them then why not stick by them until you know more.

    If you find that your trust has been breached and the charges relate to more then you will have been lied to and you know the answer then.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    you aren't a mug at all *hug* you barely know anything yet, it would be a bit o.t.t to jump the gun right now. see what happens. hope you're alright and everything gets sorted out.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I posted this in the other thread, so I will paste my response below...

    I think charging someone for looking at cartoons in this sense would be very difficult. There could quite easily be a legal debate about how old the cartoon characters are portrayed to be, and as they aren't real, it could easily be argued they are 16. (which then isn't illegal). Any prosecution based on a few cartoon images (unless they a very graphic and very young) would be very difficult.

    If I was you Id be asking a lot more questions of your other half. The police are going to need more than a few cartoons to do anything - the question is, what else do they have that you don't know about.

    Based on what you have said, Id be sticking around to hear his story and taking each day as it comes, but id be getting my trainers out, and preparing myself to run at short notice.
    :thumb:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Poor thing.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    But the thing is, you've now posted under the new user in the original users thread so anyone searching.....

    Maybe delete that post ?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    RubberSkin wrote: »
    But the thing is, you've now posted under the new user in the original users thread so anyone searching.....

    Maybe delete that post ?

    Whats going on. Who is Mary S, and what did she say :confused:
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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    Reaction to a criminal charge

    Hey guys this thread is a bit back to front now, but just wanted to retain for OP :)

    The following is from the old thread so they are not searchable by username name:
    So, some of you will know more about this than others, but am interested in the reactions.

    Various stuff has been going on, and it is currently looking fairly likely that the excuse for a man in my life (boyfriend/friend with benefits/best mate/somewhere between that lot) is likely to be charged with something to do with child porn. I've been very good friends with this person for over 5 years.

    Run a mile? Or wait a little longer to find out what's actually going on? Worth noting that he's been pretty much completely up front since the whole thing started with the police several months ago.
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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    katralla wrote: »
    What's the 'something' that he's supposed to have done?
    Well, his version of the story (which is the one I'm working on for the time being) is that a child made an allegation that he touched him inappropriately. That I'm pretty confident is not true because the dates and details of the allegation just don't work. However police obvious took his laptop and iPhone and claim to have found images on that. He's fessed up to me he looks at porn occasionally - no real surprise there, including cartoons which seems to be where the problem lies. Apparently drawing or photos equates to the same thing. Ergo Bart Simpson cartoon take off, equate to indecent images of children.

    (from previous thread)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Calvin wrote: »
    Whats going on. Who is Mary S, and what did she say :confused:

    i'll PM u Cal
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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    Louisek wrote: »
    I dont think you can possibly decide until you have all the facts from both sides, i think i would need to see the images to judge him.
    That said i would hope the people in my life would believe in me and stand by me if i was innocent.
    I guess my response is pretty clear, I'm sticking by him, tears and all at the moment. It's helped to know others may do the same and I'm not being a complete mug.

    See above for OPs response.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Helen, you are absolutely AMAZING!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm pretty sure I had 2 posts in this thread. They're gone and I didn't get a suspension/ban/warning. Both of my posts were to do with the Simpsons. Apologies if I offended anyone.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That'd be my fault. There's been a bit of a magic fix to get rid of a username.

    Everythings settled down slightly now, well, he's far more relaxed on the whole subject rather than the jibbering wreck I had on Tuesday night - I'm getting less comfortable but I guess that's just a reaction thing in a way.

    Earlier in the week I had to 'perform' and deal with his terror and tears, whereas I've now got time to think and not sure it's helping.

    Police are giving what they've got to CPS and then its wait and see til January.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks for the explanation and the note *thumbs up*
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