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How to get hubby to try new things in bed
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am a 41 year old woman who has remarried two years ago. I am very creative by nature, and have literally hundreds of fantasies, positions and locations that I really want to try, and enjoy sex with my husband. The problem is, when I suggest that we go outside, have anal sex, try sex toys etc.... my husband always says "no thanks". I love him very much, but I am not happy with once or twice a week...with the same 2 or three positions. I do not want to venture out of my marriage, so I need help on how to get him to experiment with me, and just HAVE FUN! (while dating, he would perform cunnilingus, but now I get it about once every 8 months....if I nag....while I try to perform fellatio on him at least once a week) HELP!!!!!
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Him going down on you once every 8 months is just lazy - especially if you go down on him often. Have you expressed how much you'd like it if he did it more often? Has he given you any reasons to why he won't do it?
Sometimes the easiest way is just to ask for it, straight out. Next time you guys are going through your foreplay motions, tell him how much you'd like for him to play between your legs - how much you crave it. Perhaps if he knew how much it turned you on, he'd make the effort. If you don't say anything, he may not even know that anything is wrong.
I'm curious as to how much you express your desires with him. I know you said you've asked him to experiment in other ways, but when he replies with 'no thanks', do you ever ask why? Attempt to find out why he's strictly opposed to it, and not even open to discussing it?