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Not contacting him...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
They say not contacting your ex for 30 days either gets them back or helps u move on. When we first broke up I was desperate and basically sent him text messages begging him to have sex with me hoping that would get him back, even telling him I wouldn't tell his new girlfriend. I even told him I was on my way to the hospital. He ignored me. I stopped contacting him for 3 days hoping to hit the 30 day mark. Today I found a new peace. So I decided to apologize for my behavior and told him that I should want him to be with the person that makes him happy. He ignored me. Him ignoring me didn't hurt as much as last time but I wish he would just acknowledge my apology.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You really expect him to reply after the games you played with him? First pestering him for sex then making up that you were ill? Thats playing with peoples emotions, im not surprised he's ignoring you now
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Will him acknowledging your apology give you some hope?
    I agree with Lexi.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Be lucky he makes it easy on you and doesn't string you along.

    This could be a valuable lesson for you, how to deal with exes.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lexi99 wrote: »
    You really expect him to reply after the games you played with him? First pestering him for sex then making up that you were ill? Thats playing with peoples emotions, im not surprised he's ignoring you now

    I didn't make up that I was ill, I was suicidal and my mom said she was gonna take me to the hospital to be on suicide watch. I know I acted crazy but I loved him so much. He didn't even ask me why I was going. He just ignored me. I did end up going to Psych urgent care though.

    Him acknowledging my apology wudn't give me hope that we'd get back together but it would make me feel better.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think it's always out of order not to accept a genuine apology.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well if you apologized then common courtesy would have been nice.
    On the other hand though, you've gone 30 days and if you've started to make peace with yourself then thats the most important part.
    He's out of your life now so seeking acceptance or approval from him should be the bottom of your list.
    What you need now is approval from yourself! A little self-actualization goes a long way! Find out what makes YOU happy now that you don't need to concern yourself with someone else's emotions or happiness.
    Know what I mean?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you're happy and 'at peace', let it go. Thinking about why or when or how or if he's going to acknowledge an apology is not moving on, or letting him be, it's low-grade bunny-boiling.

    You behaved like a bit of a wally, and then you apologised. That's all you can do, so let him get on with what he's doing and don't let it be an issue.

    A genuine apology is like a gift; it's a statement of truth and regret and you give it to someone without expecting anything back.
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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    Butterflykisses wrote: »

    A genuine apology is like a gift; it's a statement of truth and regret and you give it to someone without expecting anything back.

    :yes: word. This is going to take time and you're going to need to be a little brave and not be afraid to take lots of support along the way but the tenderness to help build your personal strength will come from your family and friends rather than you ex. *hug*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Butterflykisses wrote: »

    A genuine apology is like a gift; it's a statement of truth and regret and you give it to someone without expecting anything back.

    POTW
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    katralla wrote: »
    POTW

    I agree.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    harumph, it looks like helen got in there first but, it we posted at the same time, I promise.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    **helen** wrote: »
    support along the way but the tenderness to help build your personal strength will come from your family and friends rather than you ex. *hug*

    See thats the problem I guess. Thanks for saying that because I'm so used to my support coming from him and not my family. Even with getting over him I want my support to come from him.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Butterflykisses wrote: »
    If you're happy and 'at peace', let it go. Thinking about why or when or how or if he's going to acknowledge an apology is not moving on, or letting him be, it's low-grade bunny-boiling.

    You behaved like a bit of a wally, and then you apologised. That's all you can do, so let him get on with what he's doing and don't let it be an issue.

    A genuine apology is like a gift; it's a statement of truth and regret and you give it to someone without expecting anything back.


    nice one mam... got that right there...
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