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Cry for Attention!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
My boyfriend dumped me, said he hasn't been in love with me for a long time. He won't answer my text messages and return my phone calls. He was my best friend and I feel lost without him. He was the only person that made me feel wanted and now he doesn't want me.
I have been having thoughts of purposely ending up in the hospital. I've heard too many stories of people coming together in times of tragedy. I've been researching ways to do this that won't kill me, just so I can call him from the hospital with my sob story...maybe a near death experience will make him love me again.
I don't know what to do. Nobody seems to understand my pain. They all just think I'm nuts.
I have been having thoughts of purposely ending up in the hospital. I've heard too many stories of people coming together in times of tragedy. I've been researching ways to do this that won't kill me, just so I can call him from the hospital with my sob story...maybe a near death experience will make him love me again.
I don't know what to do. Nobody seems to understand my pain. They all just think I'm nuts.
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Comments
Dont do anything stupid or extreme though. Theres much more chance that it would make him hate you than anything.
The ONLY thing that will heal how you feel is time.
Im afraid youve just got to ride this one out, although I know it makes you feel like youre going mental.
Were you together a long time?
Don't do it. It will not make him love you. It is a selfish thing to do and will hurt others around you. What are you going to say to your family, "oh, don't worry about me really, I only did this for attention"? Too many people try this sort of ruse and most of the time it simply prolongs the agony of splitting up. You are effectively blackmailing your bf into staying with you and denying both of you the opportunity to find happiness elsewhere.
Yes a really long time.
2. You cant make someone love you, so if you did get back together, you would have harmed yourself for nothing.
*hug* It sucks.
Ive been there too. My ex husband told me he didnt love me anymore after 9 years, and I just felt like someone had opened the car door and chucked me out onto the motorway. Seriously awful.
I got over it though and it didnt take long to realise that it was actually for the best, because if its not right for one of you, then its not right for either of you.
You deserve to be with someone who properly loves you.
Sometimes relationships just do come to an end. It doesnt mean it was a waste of time.
Please dont do anything stupid, because youll just be prolonging it.
x
Yea it was 9 years. He said he hasn't loved me in 2 years. I just wanted to die.
When i read your post i felt sad for you because you come accross really naive. I don't think you are nuts, i think you are just probably lonely...and desperate for attention to say the least...You'd just be making a fool out of yourself and wasting everyones time in the hospital
I've just recently found myself in the very same situation. Where the person that I've loved and fought so hard alongside for the last few years came out and told me that they weren't in love with me. Despite saying that they were, without prompting, right up until a couple of days before. Not only did I have to deal with that bombshell, I also had to hear that she'd hooked up with an old friend from her past. One who she'd assured me that I could trust her with not days before.
It is an awful place to find yourself in and it disintegrates the very core of everything you had believed in, about your life and about yourself. It is the biggest shock to the system and leaves you on the floor, with no self esteem and the most insane amounts of pain and unresolved feelings.
I am working my way through this, as are you I would imagine, and have made some progress. If you ever want to share with someone in the exact same boat then feel free to message me. I might be able to give you some thought processes that you can use to rationalise your feelings.
Take care...
:yes: Suzy has come through the other side stronger than ever.
Something which did help me through the rough times was to think about the less good aspects of him and our relationship and also my own views and expectations of relationships when I first got with him, write them down in a list and reread to yourself if it helps focus your thoughts. Do this, be open to the words of others who have been through similar situations, find your own ways of thinking which ease the pain just a little and then you will be able to start taking something positive from this journey. Each relationship is different. It sounds a cliche but anything which makes you learn more about yourself and what you want/don't want from relationships takes you that little step further to feeling stable within yourself and eventually being able to share that with someone.
Look after yourself and keep posting x
Even worse you said a near death experience could make him love you, what if you did something and it goes wrong you could end up dieing! how is that fair on your family and friends?
When my ex ended our relationship i loved him and he didnt love me and it hurt like hell and i felt like my hole world had fallen apart. But you need to just stand up tall, call ya mates and go and do some retail therapy that helps =], spend some time with friends and they will make you feel good =].
Exactly. If what he said about staying with you for two years even though he doesn't love you is true, then think about it...it makes him a bit of a coward I reckon. Ultimately it leaves you free to look for someone who knows their own mind (even if this feels a long way off in the future) and you will be happy with someone else again and they will be able to give you the love and respect you deserve. You have every right to feel lousy, upset, angry for as long as it takes, especially since he hasn't been honest about his feelings towards you. I'm so glad you've decided not to do anything to put yourself in hospital. Stay strong x