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The most frustrating relationship
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi Everyone,
I have been in my current relationship for 6 years, I love him to bits. But He drives me insane!!
As an example, I do Amateur dramatics, have done since I was 10 (I am now 25). I told him about this when we first got together, and he comes to see my shows. However, he gives me the hardest time about it. I am going to be producing a show starting end of Feb and I have so much to do to prepare for it. I can't do it when he's around because he moans at me for it, so I can only do it if I have a day off and he's at work. This is really stressing me out. Tonight, after telling him about 5 times throughout the day that I am busy tomorrow doing these things, he comes up to me and says "you've got the day off tomorrow haven't you?" Meaning he wants me to do something, I (because of telling him my plans as already stated above) rolled my eyes and said "yeah, but I'll be busy like I've told you". To that, he then flailed his arms about and started having a go saying "oh that's fine, every day off you only do what you want to do and never think about me and what I want" (Or words to that effect), that then made me angry and defensive. I then shouted at him, and he reacted by grinning and calling me a psychopath..."Yeah, cos I'm the one who's getting wound up!" he said. So basically, he's wound me up by not understanding the stress and pressure I am under, then calmed himself down by this time and so I'm the one shouting because he's been a twat, then he denies all knowledge of it and he just leaves me feeling like I'm going insane.
Sorry, that's really long! But it happens all the time. He has no hobbies, he never goes out apart to go to work or visit his parents. And the only thing I do is my amateur dramatics. If I didn't do that, I would be the same - a hermit. But he can't let me have that. It doesn't help things that I do not drive and therefore if I want to get anywhere I am relying on public transport which takes forever.
How do I get him to understand? Am I being unreasonable? Am I going insane? I don't know. It's not even like I can leave because of various things, I won't go into that.
Can someone let me know if I'm going mental or not and what they would do or say in my situation?
Thanks. XXXX
I have been in my current relationship for 6 years, I love him to bits. But He drives me insane!!
As an example, I do Amateur dramatics, have done since I was 10 (I am now 25). I told him about this when we first got together, and he comes to see my shows. However, he gives me the hardest time about it. I am going to be producing a show starting end of Feb and I have so much to do to prepare for it. I can't do it when he's around because he moans at me for it, so I can only do it if I have a day off and he's at work. This is really stressing me out. Tonight, after telling him about 5 times throughout the day that I am busy tomorrow doing these things, he comes up to me and says "you've got the day off tomorrow haven't you?" Meaning he wants me to do something, I (because of telling him my plans as already stated above) rolled my eyes and said "yeah, but I'll be busy like I've told you". To that, he then flailed his arms about and started having a go saying "oh that's fine, every day off you only do what you want to do and never think about me and what I want" (Or words to that effect), that then made me angry and defensive. I then shouted at him, and he reacted by grinning and calling me a psychopath..."Yeah, cos I'm the one who's getting wound up!" he said. So basically, he's wound me up by not understanding the stress and pressure I am under, then calmed himself down by this time and so I'm the one shouting because he's been a twat, then he denies all knowledge of it and he just leaves me feeling like I'm going insane.
Sorry, that's really long! But it happens all the time. He has no hobbies, he never goes out apart to go to work or visit his parents. And the only thing I do is my amateur dramatics. If I didn't do that, I would be the same - a hermit. But he can't let me have that. It doesn't help things that I do not drive and therefore if I want to get anywhere I am relying on public transport which takes forever.
How do I get him to understand? Am I being unreasonable? Am I going insane? I don't know. It's not even like I can leave because of various things, I won't go into that.
Can someone let me know if I'm going mental or not and what they would do or say in my situation?
Thanks. XXXX
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Comments
I don't think you're going mental. Try telling him to put himself in your shoes but by all means try to find some time for him as well.
Good luck sorting it out!
I know how it feels to have your OH start an argument from nothing then turn it round to its all your problem,I dont have a solution for how to stop that from happining I just know from past experiences how stressful and draining that can be,Your left feeling like you dont know if your coming or going/
I think you need to find away of telling your boyfriend how you need his support when your doing things rather than him dragging you into petty arguments about BS stuff just cause he aint getting his own way.
Anyways good luck.