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trust issues
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I have been married for 6 years and I love my husband very much. We have 3 young children and are usually very happy together.
In the past I found out that my husband visited a massage parlour, emailed some ladies on an adult site and emailed a lady telling her to call him while he was away on business.
We have mostly worked through all of these issues but I am still having trouble trusting that he is totally committed to our family. Every couple of months the issue creeps up and we have a big blowout about it. This is the only thing that we have ever had a fight about and it breaks my heart.
How do I just turn off the feelings and learn to trust. I want to trust him fully because what kind of marriage can work with these feelings? Any suggestions for making our relationship stronger with a good base of trust?
In the past I found out that my husband visited a massage parlour, emailed some ladies on an adult site and emailed a lady telling her to call him while he was away on business.
We have mostly worked through all of these issues but I am still having trouble trusting that he is totally committed to our family. Every couple of months the issue creeps up and we have a big blowout about it. This is the only thing that we have ever had a fight about and it breaks my heart.
How do I just turn off the feelings and learn to trust. I want to trust him fully because what kind of marriage can work with these feelings? Any suggestions for making our relationship stronger with a good base of trust?
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Comments
Reading your post, it’s not surprising you are still having some issues around trust with your husband. It’s very upsetting when the people we love and trust most in the world let us down.
It also sounds like you guys have really tried to work things out and you should be proud of yourself for taking such big steps to get over this. I can understand that you still think about his past behaviour and don’t be too hard on yourself for still thinking about it and not being able to totally move past it. You are definitely doing the right thing but continuing to talk to your husband, and learning to communicate more effectively as a couple might help.
Or maybe talking to a qualified but impartial third party will help you both work through some issues so do consider relationship counselling.
I hope you can both work through this and come through the other side.