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Perception of young parents
**helen**
Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
What's yours?
Victoria is a young mum and she has some interesting insights.
Be good to hear your views.
Victoria is a young mum and she has some interesting insights.
Be good to hear your views.
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So, I have nothing agaisnt young mums SO LONG AS THEY CAN COPE I think for the saftey of some children, and their parents (young or old) people need to help out. And in some cases, the children will need to be put in care.
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I dont think you can make any snap judgements on young mums, cause some of them are the best mums in the world, but others aren't, but you get that at any age
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A young age doesnt make someone a bad parent necessarily, but I think its more likely to be a shock to the system.
I have a friend whos just had her first baby at 20 and is really struggling as its not like she thought it would be. hasnt slept for more than an hour and a half at a stretch for 6 weeks. I just looked at her and thought its like a child with a child. She was looking after the baby alright, but I still thought it was a shame, even though she had wanted to have a baby.
Its hard enough when youre older
I agree. I think there are great young mums out there but I think understandably it is going to put a lot of pressure on say a 16 year old who has just had a baby. Biologically they are going through hormonal changes yet somehow they have to put that aside to raise a kid. It's obvious there will be some difficulty. Rather than condemning young mums and assuming they are all bad. The difficulties need to be recognised and more support needs to be offered.
A few others I would be less sure about though. But it depends on the person. Mothers in their 20's/ 30's would be the same though, some would cope, others wouldn't. Everyone is different.
I have no problem with it as long as they make an effort :thumb:
I think this is absolutely true.
I also think it's important to make a distinction between the teens who get pregnant accidentally and decide to keep the baby, and those who choose motherhood for themselves. I have a lot of respect for the former, especially the ones who go on to make a decent life for themselves and their children, but I cannot understand anyone choosing to have a baby while they are still children themselves.
Of course, when you're young you think you're terribly grown up and mature and able to handle it all, but I find it totally wrong, and actually a little bit frightening. Especially when many of them simply do not have the means to support a family. Not to mention the parts of their life they'll miss out on!
Yeah right.
Pretty good earner after the JSA and Housing.
It's wrong to want/have a baby just because they are cute ect. but that is the reason a lot of teen's have children. Having said that though, I don't agree with abortion... So. I guess, Just wear a condom.
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Is that a joke? Thats the equivelent of making 2.8 pounds an hour working full time. Unless these other benefits are just exuberant, I doubt you could easily or comfortably support one person off that, let alone a terribly expensive child. If you do see these teen mothers with the decked out babies, you honestly believe they have bought it all solely from government assistance?
A quick google search and several sites state that the average cost of a child a month is around 730 pounds, luxuries not included.
I know parents, young and old who don't pay anywhere near that to look after their kids. Instead they blow it on fags and booze.
Some young people make brilliant parents, some older ones make awful parents.
Seen a film a while back called 'To Courtney With Love' about a 14 year old mother with terminal cancer. Was a real eyeopener. I cried. :yes:
You're right, love is the most important thing. But I wouldn't agree with time with the child showing the most love.
What about a 16-year-old parent who leaves their child in a nursery full time so they can carry on at school, get qualifications and then a decent job to make sure that child is provided for? I'd say that shows a lot more love.
Besides, age is almost irrelevant when it comes to deciding who's going to be the better parent. A woman who has a child when aged 30 could still end up being a crap mother
Frankly I think that people who are older are more able to provide a stable household for their children but that's just a generalization. Also, it can help if you have a close network of family in the area that are willing to lend a hand.
You can, but having a baby to look after doesn't make it any easier.
That is definitely true. I've known more than one person whose life was in the toilet and they got their act together and made something of themselves once they had a child to look after.
yeah but back then, people were also married for life by that age.
Its not the same set up now at all. Most people having babies young now, are pretty much choosing to go into single parenthood, which although it can work well, is not an ideal situation at all for neither the person doing all the parenting alone, nor the child
I guess it's always been a problem though. But at least 50 years ago even the poorest mums (dads didnt really do cooking) would make an effort to cook for their kids, these days its easy to cop out with mcdonalds, every day.
Where mums will sit on facebook chainsmoking whilst pretty much ignoring their kids, letting them wander around the house and pull vases over and nearly get themselves killed. It's just that lack of common sense that makes my blood boil. I guess the generalisation is that more young parents are likely to be in this group than older parents due to socioeconomic factors (no money, less educated) and also just less life experience / time to sort out their priorities.