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should i tell him or not??

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
i have alot of male friends and my boyfriend knows it, i dont meet up with them its just texting if i do meet them its because i have bumped into them in town on a night out.

but one of them is an ex which my boyfriend knows about but he wants to meet up and go shopping, there diffently isnt anything between me and my ex but should i tell my boyfriend he wants to meet and go shopping, or meet him and not tell my boyfriend or not meet him at all.

My boyfriend know he can trust me because i love him so much and i trust him and if it was the other way round that i wouldnt be too fussed because i trust my boyfriend and i know he would tell her to back off.

what do you think??

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Tell him but dont go shopping.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Go shopping but just tell him with a friend. Cuz that's what he is right now. Shopping is as harmless as it can be. If he asks more into detail, don't hold the info back (because it seems you are keeping it a secret which makes it look bad).

    There is a difference between lying (which you should not do) and telling the whole truth (which is not always necessary).

    /e: If you yourself would expect your boyfriend not to go shopping with one of his ex's and would be upset if he did, then don't go. Can't really have something, you wouldn't grant your own partner, can you?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What happens if he finds out that its her ex though? Lying by omission might come into it, I trust my women, but Id be annoyed if a partner had said just a friend, when it was an ex.

    If its that much of a panic, might I ask why you are worried about it? Are you worried what your partner might think about you going out with your ex however innocently.

    Tell him the truth, if he is uneasy about it, dont go, if he is ok about it then have a good shopping trip.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    because he has no partners and i am his first he gets worried that i dont like him as it is inscecuraties (sorry about the spelling) and i dont want him thinking that i am meeting him because he is no good for me.

    He thinks he is boring and i want excitment and my ex was a laugh yeh but he wasnt commitment and i defo would have never of trust him.

    i might just tell him and not go. i have told him loads of times that i will not talk to any of my male friends and he says no i dont want you to stop talking to them but he often says who is texting you your boyfriend.

    i am just going to tell him and if he doesnt like the idea of it i wont do it but if he is ok then i will.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You say he thinks he is boring, and that you want excitement, its almost as if you are trying to justify something in your mind here. Is he boring?

    Why not go out shopping with the bf instead.

    Id say tell him, shows that you trust him, that your not uncomfortable to talk about your exes and that you keep in touch (showing no hidden agenda, nothing to hide etc) and that your not going because you and your mr are going to go out.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no i dont want excitment i wrote it all wrong sorry.

    he thinks he is boring for me but to me he is perfect he gives me enough excitment.

    i do talk to him about my ex's but only when he asks because i dont want him thinking i dont want to be with him. But i am gunna tell him and if he doesnt like it then fine i wont go but if he is ok with it then i will go.

    i wouldnt be buyin anything if i went shoppin with my ex ha i have no money i would just be watching him spend all his money
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont imagine your bf would be too happy that you wanted to go out with your ex just to watch him spend his money.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    he wouldnt be spending my money he would be spendin his own i dont have any money to spend
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I meant you watcing him spend his money :P
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    going shopping with an ex to watch them spend money whilst having nothing yourself sounds like one hell of a boring/frustrating day.
    I would tell the bf, and not go shopping
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