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not sure what to do

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Hello,

I'm new here, need some advice, did some googling and ended up here. Hope someone has some ideas on what to do.

Ive done something a bit stupid and don't know what to do. i startedgoing out with this guy a little while back and when i was drunk i let him take lots of pictures of me- posing in my underwear, in the nude, having sex withhim and stuff. I didn't really want to but he was kind of insistent, so i let him...

Now, a month or so later, the really obvious thing has happened and he's dumped me. And he has all these pix of me. and I've already seen some onFlickr, and I know he's shown his mates (we know some of the same people) some of them too.

This sounds like i'm a snob but i'm really not the kind of girl who does this kind of thing and i'm terrified that my brothers or parents or someone will find out... This is making me really depressed, and i don't know what to do...

Any ideas?

amber.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm not sure what the legal implications of posting pictures on the net are when they were only intended for private use so I would suggest getting legal advice. There is not much else you can do otherwise except talk to the guy and hope that he will be a gentleman and destroy the pictures.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    what a cunt. Is there no way he would agree to delete the photos. I would certainly complain to flickr and maybe contact the police
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've mailed flickr, just waiting to hear back. dont want to go to the police because there's no way my parents would avoid finding out (i'm only 17) and i don't want to have to tell people what i've done (except on the internet, with a fake name!)

    I asked him to delete them and he just laughed :(

    It was a messy break-up and i think he's still pissed at me.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    First, don't care what he thinks. If he's put pictures up online of you without your permission then he clearly dosen't care about you - so don't care of his sorry ass.

    If he posts anything without your permission then you are legally entitled to get it removed. If he persists, then call the cops as taking nude / semi nude pictures of uner 18 year old girls can be classed as illegal.

    Either way, you've done nothing wrong and you don't need to feel bad.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    TallFrank wrote: »
    If he persists, then call the cops as taking nude / semi nude pictures of uner 18 year old girls can be classed as illegal.

    Oh I think that's very true!

    I would suggest then that your ex finds out that he could be facing a prison sentence at worst for distributing under-age porn.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you have to be 18 to model naked, so I don't see why Flickr is any different. I think Flickr will probably delete it, but the damage is already done. There are websites specifically set up to show candid or stolen photos of young women naked or having sex, so it's already likely to be in the public domain.

    I don't really think there's much you can do about it, other than take it as a life lesson. I think it's an awful thing to do to someone and I feel for you.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sites will remove anything as long as you can prove it's you. :)

    Like Kermit says though, you may be too late. Unless you can act really quickly beore anyone makes a copy, once it's online this stuff spreads like wild fire.

    Good luck in sorting this out. :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh god thats horrible. All i can say is what everybody else has pretty much said, so i wont be no help, but i would just contact the site, explain your situation, and prove its you somehow to get it removed. From what you have said, I think asking him to delete them is kinda out of the question, he sounds like many boys i know. But other than do all that, there isnt much you can do, just try to relax :) everyone makes mistakes.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Get the police on him ;)
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