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Being Single
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hello,
I’m 18 years old and I have lived in London (UK) all my life, I attended secondary school and I am now looking for employment.
I have a few problems which I have thought deeply about but I feel I would prefer it if I could get some feedback from here.
I have never, ever had a girlfriend and I have hardly any female friends, I’m still a virgin and proud of it, I try not to follow the sheep by going out ‘on the pull’ (which in my opinion is VERY desperate) and shagging any old tart I find in a gutter because I have morals and pride in myself.
I do not drink alcohol, smoke or take drugs, plus I do not like clubbing (I hate it, it’s too expensive, you can’t hear yourself, everyone is pissed as farts, and all the women I see in these places I feel are not worth my time taking seriously), however I do occasionally go out for a meal in a pub with my male friends approximately every 2-3 weeks which I enjoy.
I have always been praised by my family, friends and other people I know for my good standards such as excellent hygiene, my politeness, friendliness and understanding, I am very popular but I’m not someone who boasts about it because I don’t care whether people like me or not.
I consider myself to be very good looking (I’m vein I know, sorry!) and I care for my body and who I am, I walk a whole 20 miles in one go every single week just to relax and keep fit, plus I do other physical activities but I do not want to work to have large muscles because I know how hard they are to keep once you achieve them.
Occasionally I get girls give me signs when I’m out, I have approached girls in the past but all of them have rejected me because of peer pressure.
A girl the same age as me who I know has already made it clear to her friends that she likes me a lot but because of peer pressure she holds back and acts as if she does not, and unfortunately she has been warped by the media that she feels she has to be super slim (she’s not even fat, she’s really curvy!) and because of this I have learnt that she makes herself sick, which has upset me a lot as I know I could defiantly make her feel human and love her for who she is, but at the end of the day it’s her own decision and if she can not accept my offer to help that is her own problem.
I would prefer to go out with a girl who does not drink or smoke and has morals, could anyone give me any advice on how I would do this, I have began looking around but I would just like some help in finding my feet.
As I said above, I’m still a virgin and I’m really proud of it because I do not let peer pressure get the better of me by making me feel as if I need to loose it to someone who I don’t love just to fit in with a crowd, plus I know I’m STD-free and not a father (and not one for a very long time yet I hope!).
Please help, I'm confused and I don't know where to turn, I feel I'm not designed for this world, I was put here by accident, I'm a decent person living in a undecent world.
I’m 18 years old and I have lived in London (UK) all my life, I attended secondary school and I am now looking for employment.
I have a few problems which I have thought deeply about but I feel I would prefer it if I could get some feedback from here.
I have never, ever had a girlfriend and I have hardly any female friends, I’m still a virgin and proud of it, I try not to follow the sheep by going out ‘on the pull’ (which in my opinion is VERY desperate) and shagging any old tart I find in a gutter because I have morals and pride in myself.
I do not drink alcohol, smoke or take drugs, plus I do not like clubbing (I hate it, it’s too expensive, you can’t hear yourself, everyone is pissed as farts, and all the women I see in these places I feel are not worth my time taking seriously), however I do occasionally go out for a meal in a pub with my male friends approximately every 2-3 weeks which I enjoy.
I have always been praised by my family, friends and other people I know for my good standards such as excellent hygiene, my politeness, friendliness and understanding, I am very popular but I’m not someone who boasts about it because I don’t care whether people like me or not.
I consider myself to be very good looking (I’m vein I know, sorry!) and I care for my body and who I am, I walk a whole 20 miles in one go every single week just to relax and keep fit, plus I do other physical activities but I do not want to work to have large muscles because I know how hard they are to keep once you achieve them.
Occasionally I get girls give me signs when I’m out, I have approached girls in the past but all of them have rejected me because of peer pressure.
A girl the same age as me who I know has already made it clear to her friends that she likes me a lot but because of peer pressure she holds back and acts as if she does not, and unfortunately she has been warped by the media that she feels she has to be super slim (she’s not even fat, she’s really curvy!) and because of this I have learnt that she makes herself sick, which has upset me a lot as I know I could defiantly make her feel human and love her for who she is, but at the end of the day it’s her own decision and if she can not accept my offer to help that is her own problem.
I would prefer to go out with a girl who does not drink or smoke and has morals, could anyone give me any advice on how I would do this, I have began looking around but I would just like some help in finding my feet.
As I said above, I’m still a virgin and I’m really proud of it because I do not let peer pressure get the better of me by making me feel as if I need to loose it to someone who I don’t love just to fit in with a crowd, plus I know I’m STD-free and not a father (and not one for a very long time yet I hope!).
Please help, I'm confused and I don't know where to turn, I feel I'm not designed for this world, I was put here by accident, I'm a decent person living in a undecent world.
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Comments
Not sure I understand this bit? Why exactly do you think they're rejecting you?
it may be that you keep your self to your self a bit much?? i dont know this for sure but you may give girls the idea you think your to good for them, loosen up a bit and clubbing is not that bad..its fun if you are out to have a dance and drink.. you should try it
I spent 3 hours walking today, and that was just work!
It took me a lot of guts to actually start the thread because I didn't feel comfortable doing it, I get paranoid in my mind that someone who I don't want to will find this thread, even though I haven't given away my name, I always get the feeling I'm being 'watched'.
You have got it in one, most of the girls tend to avoid me because I'm not one of the crowd, in reality I am a really, really shy and quiet person, I keep myself to myself a lot of the time and there are only really a few people who I trust. I can count my 'true' friends on one hand.
I am a very sensitive person and I get upset very easily, clubs really aren?t my scene, I can't stand the flashing lights, the heat and the deafening music - to some it may be great, but to me it?s torture.
My idea of relaxing and loosening up is laying in a cool, dark room for a while, I don't require alcohol to do that for me.
The ironic thing is that I love music which they play in clubs, I'm a fan of Trance/Techno/Dance.
I'm constantly being told that "they broke the mould when they made you" and that I'm "one of the nicest out there" by people.
I am not one who likes to mess about or use people, I respect women for who they are and just don't see them as a potential shag like a lot of men do - I'm waiting for the right person who will see through me and understand who I am and what I stand for and love me for who I am. :wave:
It's hard to describe myself, you have to meet me in person to really understand me.
Thanks.
Came off a bit, yeah. But some people see that as 'confidence' and apparently women flock to it... according to the masses.
To mister MZ1C, you say these women are rejecting you because of peer pressure. What is it that their peers are telling them in order for them to be wary and decline your courtship? Once you find that out, it's likely that you'll be able to succeed.
Or in the very least realise your faults so that success is more likely next time once those faults are corrected.
Edit: Ah I see. Well there you have it then. You believe you're attractive. Go with that. Pursue in the comfort of knowing that the first signs of attraction are physical appearance.
Also, find comfort in knowing that you have some (or even one) true friend. Most, if not all, of the people I know are self-centered and selfish. Vain, arrogant, and ignorant. They take from you what they can, but try not to make it obvious in order to maximise their profits and drain you for as long as possible for as much as possible. People strive for self-gain at the expense of others and take no blame or responsibility when their greed has ruined another being. It's rare to find someone otherwise, seems like.
Best of luck.
So join things, volunteer places, do anything you can to extend your circle of friends and you'll probably find a woman in that who you'll click with.