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Need some advice.
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I have now been seeing a girl for about a month now. We are always chatting on MSN and have been out quite a few times, and I can sense that we are getting pretty close. It has gotten to the point where we can talk about pretty much anything which includes sex. She has told me that I am her first ever proper relationship and that she is currently a virgin. This is also my first official relationship, although I'm not a virgin.
Over the past few nights we have been chatting about things like fingering, kissing...etc:... basically trying to just move slowly into a sexual relationship.
I really like her, and she says it is the same for me. This evening we were going to get together and just fool around a bit, basically she likes the idea of being fingered as she says it is a fantasy of hers.
She does say that she really wants it, and I really want to do it with her too, to just move things along... but she is anxious.
Is there anything I can do to aleviate her being anxious?
I'm not trying to be pressuring with her, but equally I really want to be with her... and I just don't know how I can get things rolling without being too pushy.....or being too suffocating?
Over the past few nights we have been chatting about things like fingering, kissing...etc:... basically trying to just move slowly into a sexual relationship.
I really like her, and she says it is the same for me. This evening we were going to get together and just fool around a bit, basically she likes the idea of being fingered as she says it is a fantasy of hers.
She does say that she really wants it, and I really want to do it with her too, to just move things along... but she is anxious.
Is there anything I can do to aleviate her being anxious?
I'm not trying to be pressuring with her, but equally I really want to be with her... and I just don't know how I can get things rolling without being too pushy.....or being too suffocating?
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Comments
I'd suggest not planning on moving onto sex the first evening, but when you do, remember condoms. There's nothing like being a nervous girl on your first time and fretting that you're going to have to argue that one out.
just take over, but keep it slow.
I see no prob there.
:yes: and I agree with Scary too.
It's great to hear you are talking openly about sex as actually being able to do this is what will make the difference between a wonderful or lousy experience.
Take a look at these articles on clitoris confidence and top ten worries for some extra tips.
Have fun.
It's up to you - you can take the lead and reassure her that it is ok and you will listen if she wants to slow things down or stop; as long as you feel that she will say so.
Or, let her lead the way; although she may be anxious about doing this.
It sounds like the start of a good, open relationship. I would just add make sure you talk about these things when you meet, rather than just over msn because it is way easier to say things over msn than it is face to face.
But yeah, you sound like a decent lad and you come across that you really care for her, and for how she feels.