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confused?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Hey...I was just hoping for a bit of advice really..
It involves a boy i met at uni..during freshers week we slept together both really drunk and he took my number and never text me.. i wasnt bothered at the time but it started to get to me, especially as my flatmate started to make friends with him.. anyway the boy i slept with came round again and ignored me blah blah.. eventually found out he was embarrased that he never text me etc got drunk again and slept with him.. he started texting and we carried on sleeping with each other.. eventually this stopped when he said he had an sti, i was hurt.. i went for a test and it came back clear, he started being nasty and hes came back clear.. was totally confused and vowed never to talk to him again...

for some unknown reason we made up and i started texting him when i wanted him basically for sex and he came round and we have slept with each other quite a few times.. but it has started to weird me out when he was been sober and i have been drunk..and when he asks me to stop ignoring him when i see him in the city...

but the problem is i have started to fall for him and i just dont know what to do... as i feel with have been using each other..but can it ever be more than that?:confused:

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As hard as it sounds, I think you should try and forget about him completely. He has shown time and time again that he can't be trusted - trying to pursue something serious with him will only bring you heartbreak and suffering in my opinion.
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    **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    Hey lou_lou,
    It sounds like you've been through a fair bit with this guy and it's no wonder you're feeling somewhat confused about the whole thing!
    *lou_lou* wrote: »
    but the problem is i have started to fall for him and i just dont know what to do... as i feel with have been using each other..but can it ever be more than that?:confused:

    I guess the question you might want to ask yourself is: "What is it about this guy that has made me fall for him?" Does he actually have really attractive qualities that you look for in a boyfriend, or is it the attention that you've had from him so far that has led to this attraction? I think that it can be quite easy to confuse really liking someone to liking the attention we've had - no matter how limited that might be and or the physical intimacy we've shared with them.

    If you do decide that you genuinely really like him and can imagine yourself with him, then it's probably worth having a heart-to-heart with him about it. Maybe plan what you'd like to say to him in your head and then prepare yourself for possible outcomes. To be honest, whether your attraction to him is requited or not the way he reacts in such a conversation will be very telling and will probably tell you straight away whether or not he's worth your time.

    I hope this helps.

    Good luck, whatever you decide. :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The way I read it, you're already a bit iffy with him at times because of all the strange stuff going on, so it's seldom the best foundation when things aren't good to start - because they only get worse :p (me being cynical lol).

    Best of luck whatever happens :)
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