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club 18-30s holidays
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
ok my new girlfriend has been invited to go on an 18-30s holiday for a friends 18th, having heard rumours about the kind of stuff goes on on these holidays i'm a little nervous and very jealous about it,
my girl is blonde and very pretty so she gets a fair bit of attention from guys anyway, she knows i'm not happy about it and she says she understands why but still thinks it will be really good fun, i trust her 100% but i know what it can be like if your totally drunk so that you dont know what you are doing,
she says she wont go if i ask her not to, but i dont want to hold her back or make her resent it later on, i just feel that it is a holiday for single people, shes not definately made her mind up about going yet.
am i right to be upset and jealous? should i ask her not to go? i have had a few self esteem issues in the past that have never fully gone away and i know i will be going crazy the whole week she is away, all her friends go on the whole time about how gorgeous all the men over there are and stuff which just increases my worries,
we've only been together a month although we both agree it feels longer and we really do like eachother alot, i just dont really know what to do/say about it
my girl is blonde and very pretty so she gets a fair bit of attention from guys anyway, she knows i'm not happy about it and she says she understands why but still thinks it will be really good fun, i trust her 100% but i know what it can be like if your totally drunk so that you dont know what you are doing,
she says she wont go if i ask her not to, but i dont want to hold her back or make her resent it later on, i just feel that it is a holiday for single people, shes not definately made her mind up about going yet.
am i right to be upset and jealous? should i ask her not to go? i have had a few self esteem issues in the past that have never fully gone away and i know i will be going crazy the whole week she is away, all her friends go on the whole time about how gorgeous all the men over there are and stuff which just increases my worries,
we've only been together a month although we both agree it feels longer and we really do like eachother alot, i just dont really know what to do/say about it
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Comments
At the end of the day if she wanted to be unfaithful to you or sleep around with other guys, then she would. Being drunk or on an 18-30s holiday with hot guys is not an excuse or a motivation to cheat, plenty of us can get drunk around attractive members of the opposite sex and not even consider being unfaithful.
Fact is that she is with YOU and clearly cares about your feelings enough to talk it over with you and take what you think into consideration, which is something she wouldn't do if she didn't feel seriously about you. So my advice would be let her make up her own mind; you can't have a successful relationship with someone you don't trust so it is going to be something you have to learn to do.
However nice a guy you are and however nice she is, there's bound to be a bit of resentment if you try and stop her from going. I know what it's like when she's goreous and she gets 50832 lads perving at her, but it's 110% in your head at the moment.
She sounds like a sensible enough girl that just wants you to trust her. If it was me then I'd bite my tongue, let her go and try and nt worry about it.
I was in the situation, but the other way round a few years back. I had no intention of cheating on my girlfriend and I didn't. These things are geared up for people to get drunk and shag as many other people as they can, but me (and another guy in a relationship) were able to go through the whole 2 weeks without anything, we were both in love with our other halfs and didn't let anything happen, so it's not stupid to expect her to be the same.
and at the end of the day, if she's the type of girl who would cheat on you, she would do it anyway, holiday or no holiday. I think you being (or appearing) ok with it will go a long way!
oh, just thought i'd add that the only reason we went years ago is we were both single when we booked it up. Personally I wouldn't go on that type of holiday if I was in a relationship, but that's just me.
You have no right to ask her not to go tbh.
If shes given you no reason not to trust her then it would be a shitty think for you to do. If she listened and didnt go, i think youd mess up what you have.
Besides you've only been with her a month!
let her go and have fun..restricting her may have more problems. in the end youve got to have the trust.
If you trust them then there is nothing to worry about. Being drunk... no matter how drunk it is is no reason to end up cheating on someone.
Personally I would never stop my misses doing something like that and if she did I wouldn't worry that she would do anything wrong.
Even though she says she wont go if you don't want her too... I think in the long run its going to have a negative effect on your relationship.