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Been meaning 2 say for a while..
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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As for the crush on a girl, well it doesn't mean that you are definately gay. If you see yourself being with a guy in the future, then you are probably not gay, plus there's no need to put yourself in a specific box, especially at your age. But if it turns out that you do start to like other girls, then you need to do what you want to do and what your heart tells you rather than being worried "because it would cause problems with your family". At the end of the day, your own self happiness is your priority and if you're family care about you then hopefully they would understand. When my older brother first came out as gay, I don't think he ever expected my parents to understand, but I think they realised in the end that his happiness is what's most important, and now the're fine with it. Overall message: Don't worry. Just go with what you feel...
Good luck
Firstly, you're definitely not strange, and although I fully understand you imagining other people will think you are, lots of people won't.
As Lipsy says, we all develop at different stages and sexuality can change and develop over time. Also, although people often have boyfriends below the age of 16, it's more likely that meaningful relationships begin from the age of 16 years and above and many people become far more appealing as they get older. There are very few lads that I would have wanted to be in a relationship with when I was 16, unless they were much older, and unfortunately that's not always the greatest option either.
Equally, if as time goes on you think you're gay then no matter what you imagine various people in your life would think, it's important to try and understand that it's actually perfectly OK and although your life might not be what you imagine now, you would have every chance of being happy.
Following from LeicesterLuke's points about not not needing to put yourself in a specific box - this is very true and you may find the following article insteresting: Exploring your sexuality
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*hugs*
I started to fancy girls really early and it's imho more of a pest. My penis fancies numerous ladies all the goddamn time when I'm going out on weekends. Let's just say he's a very demanding individual, but doesn't get half what he needs... That sucks.
Just give it some time...
Fancying a girl does not make you gay, it just means you like somebody of the same sex and if feelings were returned, it doesn't mean you have to shave your head and wear dungarees and host tofu parties.
Too many people put such emphasis on labels (I used to as well) and labels are restricting. It doesn't matter whether you like girls, guys, trans folk or whatever... What matters is your relationships with said people.
There's nothing wrong with not fancying guys, you may do one day and you may not... Think of it less as gender and more as individuals you like and fuck what other people think. Sexuality is far more complex than being polarised.
Be who you wanna be, love who you wanna love and for heaven's sake don't rush it! The best things in life are well worth waiting for.
like Namaste says try not to think about it in terms of labels - things get very messy when you do that, and you start to feel as though you have to be confined by the boundaries of the ''label'' although its human nature to want to put a name to everything. you are who you are and it sounds like you are still in the process of figuring out your sexuality and that will take time but just take it as it comes and go with the feelings - whatever they are! don't fight them or worry what other people will think if you are gay. take it as it comes.
i'm sure if its on your mind you won't be annoying her. talking is good.
Which is why is why I put it inverted commas....
Rhetorical question... Not a jab.
I remember a member (haha remember member!) from here (I will refrain from giving out a name tho), who told he fellated another man once in his "confused stage" of life, but now he is exclusively dating women and has no interest in men anymore.
Especially in your age, puberty etc., there is a lot of "getting to know" and "trying out" stuff involved. Don't fret on it, all you have to do is wait and see.
and just rest assured: There is no such thing as making the wrong decision in which sex/gender whatever to fancy. If you don't like it, try the other ones. Never heard of a lesbian saying "hmm, men are so sexy.. I wish I was straight."