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Is enough enough now?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi folks. Im new here but have been lurking a little!
I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. I have 3 children aged 7,8 and 13. He kinda lives with us right now, but we've been having problems for a while.
He refuses to have a joint bank account with me, but gives me a set amount of money each week towards the household bills etc, which means im solely responsible (but at least i know they are paid!). But he doesnt always give me the full amount because he claims he is short and needs it himself for work etc. He only makes it up when i nag him!
Im at university full time now studying for a degree, so i dont have much money myself anyway, let alone enough to sub him when he's skint.
He also is a bodybuilder. He goes the gym 4 times a week - comes home from work about 5pm, goes to gym, then onto sunbeds and doesnt get home till gone 9pm. The kids are in bed by then! He disappears each weekend to see his son he has from a previous relationship, but has not taken me with him for about 4 months - he used to though.
Last night was the last straw.
I was due to go for an evening out with my fellow students for a christms meal and a bit of a party as we have finished Uni for the holidays now. He borrowed money off me last week and promised i would have it by yesterday. Instead he left without leaving any for me so i had to cancel my night out. He didnt even tell me he had no money, he just left to see his son. I dont go out often, and im teetotal so its not like im a party animal - it was one night i had been looking forward to for weeks.
Then he sends me a text about 7.30pm last night saying he was going for a couple of drinks with his mates! I was absolutely FURIOUS. I told him i didnt think it was fair because i had cancelled my night out because he said he wsa broke yet he was going out drinking. He gave me some crap excuse that his mate was paying all night - yeah i beleive that too - not! The he turned his phone off all night, which made it worse.
He has not offered any money towards the kids christmas presents, or shopping, and to me, if we are a couple and he's living with us a family he should be concerned about stuff like that. Instead he said "oh well you have savings you have enough money to sort it" as if to say Well they are your kids you sort it.
Last night i packed his stuff, and this morning i have it outside on the lawn.
He said last night it was all my fault and that he should not have to ask permission to go out. But i think he was taking the mickey a bit by leaving me short so i would have to stay home, yet he can go out?
So ive kinda decided this is the final straw. But do you think im being unreasonable?
I kow its a week off christmas but im so unhappy right now.
Thanks for reading.
Lisa x
I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. I have 3 children aged 7,8 and 13. He kinda lives with us right now, but we've been having problems for a while.
He refuses to have a joint bank account with me, but gives me a set amount of money each week towards the household bills etc, which means im solely responsible (but at least i know they are paid!). But he doesnt always give me the full amount because he claims he is short and needs it himself for work etc. He only makes it up when i nag him!
Im at university full time now studying for a degree, so i dont have much money myself anyway, let alone enough to sub him when he's skint.
He also is a bodybuilder. He goes the gym 4 times a week - comes home from work about 5pm, goes to gym, then onto sunbeds and doesnt get home till gone 9pm. The kids are in bed by then! He disappears each weekend to see his son he has from a previous relationship, but has not taken me with him for about 4 months - he used to though.
Last night was the last straw.
I was due to go for an evening out with my fellow students for a christms meal and a bit of a party as we have finished Uni for the holidays now. He borrowed money off me last week and promised i would have it by yesterday. Instead he left without leaving any for me so i had to cancel my night out. He didnt even tell me he had no money, he just left to see his son. I dont go out often, and im teetotal so its not like im a party animal - it was one night i had been looking forward to for weeks.
Then he sends me a text about 7.30pm last night saying he was going for a couple of drinks with his mates! I was absolutely FURIOUS. I told him i didnt think it was fair because i had cancelled my night out because he said he wsa broke yet he was going out drinking. He gave me some crap excuse that his mate was paying all night - yeah i beleive that too - not! The he turned his phone off all night, which made it worse.
He has not offered any money towards the kids christmas presents, or shopping, and to me, if we are a couple and he's living with us a family he should be concerned about stuff like that. Instead he said "oh well you have savings you have enough money to sort it" as if to say Well they are your kids you sort it.
Last night i packed his stuff, and this morning i have it outside on the lawn.
He said last night it was all my fault and that he should not have to ask permission to go out. But i think he was taking the mickey a bit by leaving me short so i would have to stay home, yet he can go out?
So ive kinda decided this is the final straw. But do you think im being unreasonable?
I kow its a week off christmas but im so unhappy right now.
Thanks for reading.
Lisa x
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