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low self esteem
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Basically i was with my ex 3 and half years and for the last year he had been cheating on me but convincing me it was all in my head and everything else, the problem is i suffered with depression and was on prozac for a while after that i then had a boob job and met a new fella and i came off the prozac. Problem is i have quite low self esteem and am constantly belittling myself and my boyfriend doesn't like it i just worry though because of what my ex did that my current boyfriend would leave me if i wasn't "perfect" sounds silly but i dont feel attractive and have big insecurities about my body and wanting to be liked. My boyfriend is wonderful everything i could ever ask for but he feels too good for me and it doesn't help that a mate has said that too she may have been joking but it plays on my mind so now i fear he'll leva eme when someone better comes along although i know this is not true i can't help having these feelings. how can i get over it
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Personally, exercise makes me feel fit/healthy and much happier in myself and my appearance, or maybe a tan? etc.. do things that make you feel like you look better, even if you look the same! lol
Sorry to here about the situation, it's always rough when the problems of a previous relationship mean that something good in the here and now can be negatively effected.
Dealing with self esteem issues is never easy, but there is a lot of advice and help available that can make a real difference to the way you see yourself, which sounds like the what is causing you to doubt your current relationship.
Outside of talking to your boyfriend about the issue, which is important so that he has the chance to understand where your concerns and feelings are coming from, there's a few things you might want to look at on TheSite.org.
Our article on low self-esteem is a nice overview of the issues involved, and mentions the possible benefit of cognitive therapy. Although it might seem like a big step, counselling of this type has been shown to be very, very helpful for esteem issues. It's about thinking in a different way about yourself and strengthening your confidence in a more positive self image. Take a look at the link and see if it might be able to help. You can also check out our advice on building self-esteem through some easy to try steps.
There are links on the page to organisations who can supply this kind of therapy in your area, or our local advice finder can help locate a local service if it's something you might want to investigate.
Anyway, take a look at some of links if you get a chance, a lot of them contain some great practical advice you may find very useful