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Girlfriend said she "needed space"/"take a break"

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK....so here is what happened....last weekend, I went to hang out with her on Friday nite. We both had long weeks (we are both teachers) and we were both stressed. She also was having her period and not feeling good, overall. We also had not seen each other for a while (almost two weeks). She wanted some affection from me but I basically ignored her and had other things on my mind (work/personal problems) which I told her later on that night that they were on my mind. When we got ready to sleep, I turned away from her after she wanted to cuddle and she wanted me to hold her. But I was being a dick and didn't do it.

Fast Foward to the next morning, I was still being weird/dick and she noticed it and told me later that things were weird between us and she told me that maybe I shouldn't stay over on Saturday and I just got angry at the whole situation/talk and I certainly did not help things by getting mad and everything escalated. During the conversation, she told me that she needed space and that taking a break would prolly be best. I didn't understand why or what was going on so I was mad/angry and upset at the whole thing.
Eventually, it ended up being that I should go home since I was mad and she was not feeling me anymore at that time.

I left and she said she would take Saturday to think it over. So after taking a day to think it over, We talked and she said she wanted a break and that we could see each other in two weeks.

BTW, her thoughts on a break was not meant so she could see other people but it was more of a personal/work thing.

Since then though I have talked to her almost every night basically...either through IM or on the phone.

Now the other night, we talked again about us, she said she's got a lot of stress and that we were having issues (not being nice to each other, me ignoring her) and that together it was too much for her and that she needed time to decompress and that she felt like she was not getting that. She also said she has a lot to balance (I think she means Work/boyfriend/Dog/room-mate/family/friends) and sometimes its too much. She's also saying that we'll go to dinner next weekend and "see how it goes" and when I asked what that meant she said she thinks it might be weird because we haven't seen each other in a while...

So I don't know. I know I won't feel weird. I think I'll be nervous/excited to see her. I don't know about her. She said it might be weird for her but she doesn't know. I don't see how it could be.

I'm basically going to start bracing myself for the break-up if thats what it turns out to be.
BTW, I think we have been dating for 3-4months and everything was going fine IMO before this. We are really great together and have a lot in common and sexually everything was good their as well. She always gave me compliments on that area of the relationship. We've also told each other before that we "love" each other and I remember one time she told me that she was "in love" with me. I don't know....I told her the other night that I miss her and I hope we are OK.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As well as how she's feeling, I think it depends on what you want yourself. You've already admitted that you acted weirdly towards her so it's maybe not surprising that she was hurt. It doesn't sound to me like it couldn't work if you both want it to. I think it's easy sometimes to take out stress from other parts of your life (work, family, whatever) on girlfriends and boyfriends. Maybe you could have been a bit more open with her about how you were feeling stressed and therefore didn't want to cuddle or whatever. If you're in that kind of mood, make it clear that you're in a bad mood but not because of her. Unless.... it is something to do with her.... in which case are you sure you actually want to be with her?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sounds to me like "the end is nigh". She just hasn't got the bottle to tell you.
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    BunnieBunnie Posts: 6,099 Master Poster
    obviously we dont know all the ins and outs but from what you have said you were a bit of a knob towards her, so are you all that suprised she wants to spend some time apart? I know that sounds harsh, but if it was me, you would have upset me so much acting the way you did.

    perhaps it is just not meant to be.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dude I wouldn't sweat it! Just give her some time and space and DO NOT talk to her ever night and be there ready on hand and foot to talk to her. That way it'll give her the space she's wanting and it'll also show her how lonely and unhappy she'll be without you in her life! (Fingers crossed eh!)

    If you keep being clingy and not giving her the time she needs she'll more likely end it cos you'll come across as being needy and pussywhipped.

    This could work out so you get back together just back off and let things play out without talking to her until the meal.

    If she does end it DO NOT remain friends with her and DO tell her to her face that you want to cut contact and mean it!! That on its own can be a wake up call to girls and makes them think your out of their lives for good.
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