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Getting Assertive

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Hiya!

Need a little advice, i'm the worst doormat in the world & I'm having a lot of bad luck with friends. I'm sick of being treated like dirt all the time, i'm constantly being blamed for things that really actually aren't my fault and instead of standing up for myself, i just end up getting upset and agreeing with them.

Problem is, I hate confrontation but i know that to get by in life i'm going to have to do it. I've tried, but i turn into a nervous wreck & that so-called friend ends up upsetting me even more.

How can I turn myself into a tougher person?? Does anyone know where I can find assertion classes maybe?

HELP!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't know about any classes but, when you find yourself in a situation like this try coping like an angry person. First of all if someone is blaming you for something and/or confronting you, take a deep breath, count to ten and then calmly explain not you are not to blame etc etc. This way there is no confrontation, you're remaining calm and not walked over because you're standing up for yourself and at the same time you're not being an arse as you are calm and collected.

    When I was younger I used to get upset a lot too. I got over this by deep breathing as i felt myself start to shake and the tears well up and counting slowly up to ten then releasing all the hurt I felt.

    I hope this helps a little.
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