Age + Virginity = Big Deal?

BillieTheBot · May 2007

(Just a rant here, advice would be appreciated though)

I'm 18 and a virgin which doesn't boter me in the slightest, but for some crazy reason, appears to bother other people. There's a girl on my course who was talking to her boyfriend today on the phone and just happened to ask me if I was still a virgin and I said yes. She then asked if she could take a photo of me so that she could try to hook me up with some of hr boyfriend's friends or something.:eek2:

I admit I'm not one of these who goes around flaunting this or whatever, because it's not something I'm that bothered about.

[/rant over]

Former Member · May 2007

18? I know loads of people (boys and girls) who lost their virginity at uni, so obviously it's still pretty common at that age. The average age is apparently 17 for girls and 16 for boys (something I'm not sure about the accuracy of, because people are known to lie about such things).

I think it's just that thing of if someone has a new gf/bf or has just lost their virginity, they for some reason can't accept that someone else could be happy without those things in their life right now. But yeah, I think everyone hates the assumption that if you're single, you must be looking, or need setting up or something.

Former Member · May 2007

Doesn't bother me in the slightest. I've got a fair few friends at uni who are still virgins and it doesn't bother anyone in the slightest.

If you are happy in yourself you'll find the only people who care are the ones who have a lot in common with giggling hormonal 14 yr olds. (:yuck: at that image though)

Former Member · May 2007

The girls in my college course are a few years younger than me, and I find it very hard to relate to them because of how they're usually going on about sex or how they've just cheated on their boyfriends, and it goes over my head completely. They were all pretty amazed when I said I was a virgin as they're all really not at all virginal, to say the least. The other half of the class (my group of friends) didn't bat an eyelid when they found out. One of my friends who's 17 is a virgin and we're the only 2 in the group.

It does get a bit crappy when your aunts and uncles start asking why you're still single lol.
I'm 21 (in 2 weeks!) btw.

Former Member · May 2007

Ilora-Danon wrote: »

It does get a bit crappy when your aunts and uncles start asking why you're still single lol.
I'm 21 (in 2 weeks!) btw.

Fucking hate that question. I just say "because I'm not willing to settle for anyone, like you have."

Former Member · May 2007

Ilora-Danon wrote: »

The girls in my college course are a few years younger than me, and I find it very hard to relate to them because of how they're usually going on about sex or how they've just cheated on their boyfriends, and it goes over my head completely.

I get this all the time and it's so annoying. It's not that I'm jealous or anything it's just because it's becoming really boring now.

Fucking hate that question. I just say "because I'm not willing to settle for anyone, like you have.":p

Former Member · May 2007

Haha, it sucks doesn't it? It's even worse when you're at a family function (and engagement party, nonetheless) and you're there with your mum and dad and sister and her boyfriend and you're on your own. :impissed:

Former Member · May 2007

I'm With Stupid wrote: »

Fucking hate that question. I just say "because I'm not willing to settle for anyone, like you have."

I get asked why I'm single all the time and I just tell them I don't want a boyfriend! Either shuts them up or then then go, "yeh they're a pain in the arse aren't they!"

I personally would hate to be a virgin past the age of 18. Most people have lost it by then everyone is dating and having sex conversations with their mates. I'd hate to be left out of all of that and feel left behind. Oh and missing out on having lots of sex is a big negative too :razz:

eta: so if it was me then yeah being a virgin would be a big deal. But if a mate was still a virgin (and one practically is because she just doesn't seem interested

) then I wouldn't care. I might wonder about it but they're my mate so I wouldn't judge them. Although if they weren't my mate I might think them a little sad..

Former Member · May 2007

nothing wrong with it. perhaps at the time it might feel odd for some people, but when you look back it's really no big deal

didnt loose mine till I was 18 either.

Former Member · May 2007

I've got quite a few friends who are still virgins, doesn't bother them. I never wanted to do it when everyone else was having it - it put me off tbh and i don't feel the need to compare notes on my sex life like alot of people seem to do.
However there's a girl in my classes who only lost it recently and it's all she talks about. She tells us everything and goes on about how premiscuous she is. It's gross.

Former Member · May 2007

It really dosent bother me. I lost mine at 19, know people that lost theirs even older and some of my friends still are virgins. I dont think its sad at all, I dont really think about it. But then I dont feel the need to share my sex/love life with the entire world, only a handful of my friends know the full ins and outs.

Former Member · May 2007

I don't think it's a big deal in the slightest. Personally, even though I love my bf, I like to pretend he was a virgin before he met me because I hate the thought of him with so many other people before he met special little me!

So ignore what everyone else has to say, do it when you feel right as that's all that matters, too many people regret their first time due to rushing.

Former Member · May 2007

I always get slated when I discuss this topic. Last time I did, one user (who shall remain nameless) thought that, by attacking the pressures to lose one's virginity, that I was somehow criticising him personally. As we know, the pressures are huge. In our morally bankrupt society, pressures come from all sources - one's friends, adult peers and the media, to name but three. The message is that sex is cool, virginity is something to get rid of as quickly as possible, and that anyone not having sex is a loser. I remember feeling the pressures myself. I resisted until I was 20, and lost it with my first girlfriend. Instead of regretting it, like so many seem to, I loved the experience!

***

Former Member · May 2007

Ilora-Danon wrote:

The girls in my college course are a few years younger than me, and I find it very hard to relate to them because of how they're usually going on about sex or how they've just cheated on their boyfriends, and it goes over my head completely.

I totally feel for you on that part, that's a similar situation that I'm in at college, there's a load of people younger than me and they talk about their sex lives like it's the most normal thing in the world for them, and of course it is. I personally avoid them like the plague lest they find out what I am. Which is: older than them and yet is totally deficient and inexperienced compared to them.

Former Member · May 2007

Ballerina wrote: »

However there's a girl in my classes who only lost it recently and it's all she talks about. She tells us everything and goes on about how premiscuous she is. It's gross.

I knoe someone who does this all the time and TBH, it's not something I personally care about. Come to think of it, all she ever talks about is her boyfriend.:banghead:

But if a mate was still a virgin (and one practically is because she just doesn't seem interested )

I'm like this right now. I'm not interested in having a boyfriend or losing my virginity but nearly everyone else seems to care about it more than I do.

Skive · May 2007

Virginity is nothing to be proud of, and nothing to be ashamed of too.

Former Member · May 2007

didnt bother me at all.
that girl sounds like a bit of a twat !

at the time i was in quite a close group of girl mates all quite shallow and pretty desperate to 'pop the cherry' so it was like a contest but i just ignored it really and did it when i was ready and i was happy with the age and the boy so it was all good.

Former Member · May 2007

I'm glad I lost my virginity when I did, it was with my girlfriend of the time who I was with for 2 years, so it wasn't a stupid mistake and we both learnt alot from eachother. Even since her, I've only slept with a few other girls, so I'm hardly a slut. I don't think I'd be really bothered if I was still a virgin, I know loads of people who are. It's not the fact that I'd be a virgin that would get to me, it's just I'm glad I've had the experiences that I have had with (mostly) girls that I really liked.

Former Member · May 2007

Part of me dosen't want to have to bother doing it, ever, at all. I mean I really feel as though the girl will just certainly end up getting knocked up or some STI. I am supposed to just hope my luck will hold indefinitley?

Former Member · May 2007

hornet893 wrote: »

Part of me dosen't want to have to bother doing it, ever, at all. I mean I really feel as though the girl will just certainly end up getting knocked up or some STI. I am supposed to just hope my luck will hold indefinitley?

If you use protection the chances of that happening are tiny. (unless it fails in some way, which again is tiny)

Age + Virginity = Big Deal?

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