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are my mates bellends? or am i being bit too sensitive?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
right heres the thing. bascially its a regular day to day thing that im normally the butt of the joke around my mates. Its normally the little things, someone might say something and relate it too me and everyone will laugh. Some of the stuff is at times funny and i'll have a laugh too, but because its quite a regular thing i just get quite pissed off and feel a lot of the time my mates arent really my mates. I try to be a nice bloke and generous etc. and feel my mates may take that for granted, knowing i won't retaliate. Though some times i do tell them to fuck off etc if it goes too far.
Im in quite a difficult position as there aren't many people in my year so i have to basically get on with whoever. Though the one time i got pretty annoyed was when my brother joined in as well. he said something like 'he's so fat and lazy i have to pull the toaster handle down for him because his fingers are too fat to reach it.' (im 12st and 6.1ft) now i admit thats quite funny...if he had said it to someone else i probably would have cracked up, but thats the thing 90% of the time these things are projected at me! what do you say to someone that says something like that to you? my brother calls me a pushover and that i should stand up for myself. but generally i'd say im pretty confident person, when i want to be. what do you think? this the same for anyone else? cheers.
Im in quite a difficult position as there aren't many people in my year so i have to basically get on with whoever. Though the one time i got pretty annoyed was when my brother joined in as well. he said something like 'he's so fat and lazy i have to pull the toaster handle down for him because his fingers are too fat to reach it.' (im 12st and 6.1ft) now i admit thats quite funny...if he had said it to someone else i probably would have cracked up, but thats the thing 90% of the time these things are projected at me! what do you say to someone that says something like that to you? my brother calls me a pushover and that i should stand up for myself. but generally i'd say im pretty confident person, when i want to be. what do you think? this the same for anyone else? cheers.
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Comments
Hi. I know the banter can sometimes get a bit to much and may be hurtful at times, but I think maybe your brother has a bit of a point. You need to learn not to take everything to heart, easier said than done I know, and then you need to give as good as you get. Instead of laughing along with them, give them a sharp comment back - if you do, they will soon realise you are not such an easy target for piss taking as you once were.
On the other hand, you could tell them that their joking is sometimes hurtful and to hold back a bit, but this may make you look weaker and you may become the butt of their jokes even more. I would definately just give them lip back - they will soon learn to curb it a bit.
And for the record, I hardly think 12 st at 6 ft 1 is fat. I'm around 12 st at 5 ft 11 and I don't consider myself fat one bit.
Good luck... :thumb:
That can work pretty well, but its fragile ground if there arent that many other people around that you can get on with so maybe dont go for anything too extreme lol
Have you told them your not too comfortable with it?
As long as they know where to draw the line, and as lnog as you're actually giving some of it back then there shouldn't be a problem.
It's all banter though, the ones who do it more are the ones I know are there if there's a crisis or whatever and as long asyou give it back then it's fine. It's really healthy actually, I started work at a new place the other week and there's already a running joke about me liking it up the bum and I'm now adept at calling one of my workmates "a horrible little goblin", but it all goes to show that you can take and give a joke, which is what it's all about.
Start trying to make witty comebacks and don't take it to heart.
Fight fire with fire!
They'll soon realise your not such an target anymore. Only laugh when its laughable, never laugh at yourself for reasons disimilar.