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Ringing up a girl
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok so I went clubbing with this girl last night who is my best mate's girlfriend's mate... Anyway we got on really well and kissed e.t.c. I text my mate when I got home, telling him to give her my number...he replied saying that she said thanks and gave me her number...now she expects me to ring her.
Problem is, I don't know when to? I don't wanna seem too desperate and I don't wanna play games either. I also don't really know what to say or anything? lol Probably doesn't help that I'm on a huge come down and I can't think properly...but can anyone help?
Problem is, I don't know when to? I don't wanna seem too desperate and I don't wanna play games either. I also don't really know what to say or anything? lol Probably doesn't help that I'm on a huge come down and I can't think properly...but can anyone help?
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If you end up ringing her, the "what you up to?" vibe is always a good place to start, conversation will lead on naturrally from there, "up to anything tonight?" etc etc.
Text her, much easier that way neither of you is put on the spot. Leave it til a bit later when you're feeling more human and on the go for today.
Hmm sounds like I need to top up some time today.
I am really in no state to text a girl let alone talk to her.
My brain has been officially FRIED.
But then I kinda do, cos I really like this girl and I wouldn't have asked for her number if I didn't want anything to happen.
I could never do the whole 'fuck buddies' thing without getting attached either.
Oh I don't know lol, I'm feeling well depressed and shit at the moment.
Damn come downs.
If it was me and I was feeling shit, texting a new guy and being flirty would lift my mood!
Also you haven't even been on a first date yet so stop over analaysing what will happen or what can come of it. Just go with the flow and enjoy getting to know someone new. Thats one thing that can truly fuck things up when you start worrying about where its gona lead because you have no idea what she wants yet. And she won't know because you don't even know each other yet.
I'll try some banana's...I've got work at 12 too! :banghead: It was the speed mixed with the pills and alcohol which is making me feel so shit...I haven't been able to sleep at all either. Also, apart from meeting this girl, last night went a bit shit and we all sort of left things on a bad vibe..guess that's still kinda affecting my mood too.
I know, you're completely right. I am over-analysing things, and usually texting someone new would lift my mood but I keep thinking negative thoughts about it for some reason, like I'll get hurt or something.
To be honest, I think I'm just in a proper mess lol, I'll probably feel a whole lot better about it all tomorrow. I just need to try and forget about it today, get through work and then go to sleep.
Thanks for the advice and stuff, really appreciated.
I didn't fall out with anyone, it's just my mate had a shitty pill which made him feel really ill, so he spent the whole night pretty much sober, not drinking and just sitting down in a bad mood, which pissed off his girlfriend because it was her birthday and they had an argument, we ended up getting a taxi home earlier, lots of tears e.t.c. Just kinda ruined the whole vibe of the night. I just wanted to get wrecked with my mates and have a laugh, but no.
If she wants you to call you any minute you purposefully postpone it is - imho - stupid and unnecessary.
It's so easy, if she really digs you, you could probably dial her number and when she picks up fart an earthshatterer into the phone. (No, don't do this!)
Just dial her number say "oh hey it's me pill'ed, I asked this and that guy for your number, I hope that's ok, do you fancy to go for a pint after work? yeah? so I call you up at around 7pm? Alright."
pff..
Just text her, and none of this ooh now or later shit, no one likes to be kept waiting.
I pulled this bird last week and we've texted each other every day since, and she was the one who was worried that she'd look desperate, but I don't think she did at all.
Go with the flow, mate.
Yeah I know, I'm going to text her tomorrow morning.
Oooh left it a bit late there...
If you leave it to Tuesday, it'll be so obvious that you're trying to play it cool that it just looks daft.
Casual text, see what happens - no pressure.
Next day text, maybe next evening I think would have been more appropriate. Thats how I'd of played it anyway. I suppose it doesn't matter really, depends on how interested you are.
Yep! It really puts me off when a guy is so obviously trying to play it cool. You want to text her, she wants you to text her so just fucking do it! Rather than playing games. If you start playing games it will get her back up and she'll feel like she has to play it too and then it will never go anywhere.
Totally. Back in my single days I met a total fitty in our local club, had a fab night with him. I was really impressed when he text me almost immediately after I'd left, thanking me for my company- I thought it was really refreshing for someone NOT to abide by the 'three day rule'. It'[s so obvious and try-hard, if you like someone, just flippin' tell them, it saves a lot of time and energy :thumb:
You don't have to over analyse it and look into the future imagining a serious relationship. You could just go on dates and have a laugh, it doesn't have to be some huge thing taking over your life.
Yeah I agree completely, but my head was SO not with it yesterday. I would have written something stupid and emotional, just couldn't be dealing with thinking too much yesterday. I text her anyway and she text back saying she'd like to meet up for a drink or something.
Haven't got round to when yet though.
'Tis a good start man, and if you aren't wanting something serious just take things as they come and keep it casual, know?
Life's far too short to plan ahead. Here and now is all that matters.
Well, says me, really - only thing I'm planning ahead is Thailand, but that's a fancy exception. :razz:
In all honesty, if I really liked the look of her then I will ummm and ahhh a bit about it, but I always end up just texting her anyway and it only usually comes across as desperate if you barrage her with text after text if she doesn't reply.