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why are break ups so hard
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I broke up with my b/f last wknd, cos he was treating me like shit for ages and i finally decided i'd had enough, the first few days were ok and as we live together we where both making an effort to be civil and ok with each other, we are still being ok with each other but over the past few days its just been making me really upset and i find myself crying myself to sleep, i dont want to get back with him but i do miss the small things like hugs etc
how can i get over it and move on with my life without him.
how can i get over it and move on with my life without him.
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I think you need to take up a new hobby or something that will get you out and meeting some new people and doing some new things, I think doing new things will give you a sense of independance and give you some confidence back that you might have lost from being in a relationship.
The other thing that you should remember is that when relationships come to an end it is quite normal to have a period of grievance. People naturally grieve to help them deal with this sort of thing, so tears at night when thoughts of your breakup are spinning round your head are just part of moving on. Give yourself some time, if you can, get some space away from this guy, and definately fill your time with new and exciting things for your new start!
*hugs*
with time you will move on and get over it.
its a clichee, but true none-the-less.
Well, break-ups are so hard, because it is a break-out of your ordinary lifestyle, an aberration of what you are used to, to have someone there, to come home to, to love and be loved and suddenly it's gone and it feels unfamiliar in a bad sense, left alone, as if there is noone left.
The best and quickest and most painless way is - even if it's not something you want to do - get space between each other. cut contact and be busy. meet friends, knot up old loose contacts, don't be alone, because this is the best way to wallow in old good memories (because only the good memories remain) and those hurt. be in company, go out and you'll see: sooner as expected (in my experience pretty sudden, from one week/day to another), you stop bothering.
Most important thing is, that you keep in mind that your ex is good riddance and that you keep in mind the reasons why he was an asshole and why you broke up and that you SHOULDN'T and shouldn't WANT to go back to him.
chin up...