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TOO generous in bed?!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Bit of an odd one, I'll admit, but it's starting to get to me a little....
I've been with a guy for just over a month now, and while the sex is great, it's starting to dawn on me that he's not very good at 'receiving'...
While both of us initiate sex, it always seems to be him doing all the 'giving' in terms of oral etc., and he often stops me if I try to reciprocate. I don't THINK it's that I'm terrible at giving head/hand jobs etc :eek: because when we first got together I had no trouble getting him off, but the past couple of weeks I've been feeling really selfish because of it and as a result I've found it hard to really enjoy sex with him.
I've tried making a point of stopping him touching me; I spent an evening trying the dominant thing in my sexiest underwear, telling him he was incredibly generous in bed but he was just going to have to learn to lie back and take it, but he's a strong guy
and it wound up same as usual.....
As problems go, it's not the worst problem to have, but it's really getting me down and I'm not sure how to deal with it.....!! I could sit him down and ask him about it but I'm terrified he's going to come out with something like 'basically love, you're rubbish at all of that and I'd rather not waste the time!'
Any ideas?!
I've been with a guy for just over a month now, and while the sex is great, it's starting to dawn on me that he's not very good at 'receiving'...
While both of us initiate sex, it always seems to be him doing all the 'giving' in terms of oral etc., and he often stops me if I try to reciprocate. I don't THINK it's that I'm terrible at giving head/hand jobs etc :eek: because when we first got together I had no trouble getting him off, but the past couple of weeks I've been feeling really selfish because of it and as a result I've found it hard to really enjoy sex with him.
I've tried making a point of stopping him touching me; I spent an evening trying the dominant thing in my sexiest underwear, telling him he was incredibly generous in bed but he was just going to have to learn to lie back and take it, but he's a strong guy
and it wound up same as usual.....As problems go, it's not the worst problem to have, but it's really getting me down and I'm not sure how to deal with it.....!! I could sit him down and ask him about it but I'm terrified he's going to come out with something like 'basically love, you're rubbish at all of that and I'd rather not waste the time!'
Any ideas?!
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Comments
Why don't you play a game, where you have to take turns and the other person has to be completely passive? It's fun
I couldn't tell you exactly why this is, but personally I do like to see the reaction oral etc gives to a woman, gets me into the mood to. At the end of the day it will forever be a two way thing. When a man and a woman come at the same time, there's no better feeling IMO.
Im much more confident at giving than recieving. I feel silly when recieving sometimes, its not that my boyfriend is crap, or that i hate pleasure or anything. I just get embarressed for some unknown reason..
I bet its got something to do with this.
i agree
Except I think mine IS more to do with that I'm not very good at it
Ummm...tie him up
But what if he totally freaks out?
Oh I guess there is that. Maybe ask him first before you do it. Otherwise he might think you're a nutter. But then he'd be forced to be the receiver.
good luck!