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Work Related Stress - any advise?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi Guys,
Here goes…..
Last Thursday my doctor signed me off work for a week citing “stress related problem”. I have been feeling terrible over the last couple of weeks; stressed, tired, anxious, short-tempered, unable to concentrate – I know the reasons why (all work-related) and have tried to address them over the past few months but just haven’t been able to! I had diagnosed myself about 6 months ago with stress and anxiety – but had managed to get over that bout after taking a long holiday! I don’t want to feel like this – I’m only 22 for pity’s sake! I want to be enjoying myself and be happy!
I won’t tell you exactly what my profession is and who I work for. But to try and put it into perspective for you, I am working on a construction project similar to that of Wembley Stadium – except it’s not a stadium and the contract value isn’t quite £700million – but it is a highly stressful project that is behind schedule and over budget! Anyway, you could say I work as an accountant for this company managing some high value accounts.
Due to the problems in the job and my inability to say “NO” to taking on more work and responsibility – I was getting to the point of working late in the evenings and at weekends to try and get on top of everything – only problem is this did not seem to be working! I asked my line manager for additional help – another person more senior to come in and give me a hand. At first, his attitude was “there is no one else, tough luck”. But when someone became available he was sent along to help me….
Only problem is he has become more of a hindrance than help and because he is 40 years my senior and doesn’t really want to be here (he has to commute 2 hours each way everyday to get to the office) my relationship with him is not good and he doesn’t do things how I want them done… This has led me to more problems rather than solve them!
There is another senior “accountant” who I have been working with on this particular job for the past year, and I get on well with him, but unfortunately he is having his own personal problems which has meant he has not been around much recently and has put more work on me due to his absence and the fact that I’m the only person who knows the history of the job to take on his workload. I don’t know if maybe it is also this factor that has led me to feel even worse.
Anyway, so it all became too much last Wednesday lunchtime…. I had hardly done any work all day and I just felt ill – as I had done for the previous couple of weeks… I just packed up my laptop and walked out of the office. I felt so awful, I started to drive home but just couldn’t face it, so I went and sat on the beach for a couple of hours – I just wasn’t able to think straight.
Finally I went home and cried my eyes out to my mum (something I’m a little embarrassed to admit to). I then spoke to my Dad and I felt a lot better for it. My Dad was off with stress about 10 years ago, so he could relate and understand what I was saying – he said that he had recognised what was happening to me and was planning on talking to me about it.
He told me that it was because I was always willing to do more and more and take on more responsibility that my company would naturally continue to put more and more on me.
I think it’s partly my fault that I’m in this situation, for the last couple of years I have pushed myself harder and harder to climb the ladder and it has worked. I am known within the company by all the important people and I am proud of what I have achieved…. Only thing is, feeling like I do at the moment, I don’t know if I want to be the golden boy anymore!
Anyway, I called my line manager on Thursday after seeing the doctor and he reacted surprisingly well. He told me that the job would be in more trouble if it wasn’t for my efforts and if it means getting more bums on seats to help out – then he will get them (previously he said we couldn’t have more help). I’m meant to be meeting up with him tomorrow to talk…. Only trouble is, despite telling myself that it’s only a job and it’s not my life…. I still feel terrible and I’m not entirely sure that I want to return to work. Nothing will ever change in this particular company and I’m not sure really what I want anymore.
The past week has been so confusing – I have felt like I’m going insane. My Dad said that it’s entirely up to me whether I stick it out (about another 9 months on this particular job) or leave (i.e. Run-away). I just don’t know what I want to do – I don’t want to be a quitter, but I don’t want to go on being unhappy.
I went on holiday to Australia at Christmas for 3 weeks and spent a bit of time in backpackers hostels – I met loads of people who were my age and a bit older, who were taking a few months out to do a bit of travelling. I quite fancy doing it and my brother is currently backpacking around Australia so I could possibly meet up with him and keep him in check!
Over the last few days, I’ve been reading up quite a bit on stress and anxiety and read other peoples stories. It would be nice to hear from anyone who has been through it and whether they went back to their job after having a bit of time off. Or if you did leave your job – did you regret it?
Thanks for reading guys, all the best.
Here goes…..
Last Thursday my doctor signed me off work for a week citing “stress related problem”. I have been feeling terrible over the last couple of weeks; stressed, tired, anxious, short-tempered, unable to concentrate – I know the reasons why (all work-related) and have tried to address them over the past few months but just haven’t been able to! I had diagnosed myself about 6 months ago with stress and anxiety – but had managed to get over that bout after taking a long holiday! I don’t want to feel like this – I’m only 22 for pity’s sake! I want to be enjoying myself and be happy!
I won’t tell you exactly what my profession is and who I work for. But to try and put it into perspective for you, I am working on a construction project similar to that of Wembley Stadium – except it’s not a stadium and the contract value isn’t quite £700million – but it is a highly stressful project that is behind schedule and over budget! Anyway, you could say I work as an accountant for this company managing some high value accounts.
Due to the problems in the job and my inability to say “NO” to taking on more work and responsibility – I was getting to the point of working late in the evenings and at weekends to try and get on top of everything – only problem is this did not seem to be working! I asked my line manager for additional help – another person more senior to come in and give me a hand. At first, his attitude was “there is no one else, tough luck”. But when someone became available he was sent along to help me….
Only problem is he has become more of a hindrance than help and because he is 40 years my senior and doesn’t really want to be here (he has to commute 2 hours each way everyday to get to the office) my relationship with him is not good and he doesn’t do things how I want them done… This has led me to more problems rather than solve them!
There is another senior “accountant” who I have been working with on this particular job for the past year, and I get on well with him, but unfortunately he is having his own personal problems which has meant he has not been around much recently and has put more work on me due to his absence and the fact that I’m the only person who knows the history of the job to take on his workload. I don’t know if maybe it is also this factor that has led me to feel even worse.
Anyway, so it all became too much last Wednesday lunchtime…. I had hardly done any work all day and I just felt ill – as I had done for the previous couple of weeks… I just packed up my laptop and walked out of the office. I felt so awful, I started to drive home but just couldn’t face it, so I went and sat on the beach for a couple of hours – I just wasn’t able to think straight.
Finally I went home and cried my eyes out to my mum (something I’m a little embarrassed to admit to). I then spoke to my Dad and I felt a lot better for it. My Dad was off with stress about 10 years ago, so he could relate and understand what I was saying – he said that he had recognised what was happening to me and was planning on talking to me about it.
He told me that it was because I was always willing to do more and more and take on more responsibility that my company would naturally continue to put more and more on me.
I think it’s partly my fault that I’m in this situation, for the last couple of years I have pushed myself harder and harder to climb the ladder and it has worked. I am known within the company by all the important people and I am proud of what I have achieved…. Only thing is, feeling like I do at the moment, I don’t know if I want to be the golden boy anymore!
Anyway, I called my line manager on Thursday after seeing the doctor and he reacted surprisingly well. He told me that the job would be in more trouble if it wasn’t for my efforts and if it means getting more bums on seats to help out – then he will get them (previously he said we couldn’t have more help). I’m meant to be meeting up with him tomorrow to talk…. Only trouble is, despite telling myself that it’s only a job and it’s not my life…. I still feel terrible and I’m not entirely sure that I want to return to work. Nothing will ever change in this particular company and I’m not sure really what I want anymore.
The past week has been so confusing – I have felt like I’m going insane. My Dad said that it’s entirely up to me whether I stick it out (about another 9 months on this particular job) or leave (i.e. Run-away). I just don’t know what I want to do – I don’t want to be a quitter, but I don’t want to go on being unhappy.
I went on holiday to Australia at Christmas for 3 weeks and spent a bit of time in backpackers hostels – I met loads of people who were my age and a bit older, who were taking a few months out to do a bit of travelling. I quite fancy doing it and my brother is currently backpacking around Australia so I could possibly meet up with him and keep him in check!
Over the last few days, I’ve been reading up quite a bit on stress and anxiety and read other peoples stories. It would be nice to hear from anyone who has been through it and whether they went back to their job after having a bit of time off. Or if you did leave your job – did you regret it?
Thanks for reading guys, all the best.
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Comments
That moment of realisation is one that made me decided once and for all what to do.
Hey angels,
Thanks for the feedback. Everyone I speak to keeps on telling me I need to do the best thing for me... what makes me happy.
There are some aspects of my job that I really enjoy and get a real buzz out of. But I think I take things too personally - when others just do the bare minimum, get away with it and then go home at 5pm everyday.
I think that's my problem - I need to be more like those people who work to live, rather than the other way round.
After all... it's only a job and I can easily get another one if I go travelling then come home!
As I said, i think that i am going to be meeting up with my boss tomorrow to talk.... I'm considering handing in my notice, I just think I'd feel a lot better for it.
If your trained/well experienced in tour area you should have no problem geting a job when you get back. Hence me getting my proffessional membership last month is going to be useful when I start looking for a new job.
Yeah, I think the hardest bit is writing the resignation letter and not letting them talk you into staying if you really don't want to stay.
I'm not scared of leaving - I know I can get another (and better) job easily in my area of work. I think i'm more worried about letting people down and my boss calling me a quitter! I know it sounds stupid!
I keep telling myself I can't let the "team" down. But at the end of the day... I can't stand most of the people I work with and there is absoultely no "team" spirit!
Maybe I've just convinced myself that I NEED to leave!