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Love? It just doesn't seem to be efficient.
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Right, this is quite long, but interessting, so see what you think;
Do you believe in romantic love? I don't, monogemy seems pretty stupid. It seems to me that the initial feeling of love is infatuation. You are convinced that this person is perfect, and you desperately want it to be true. After a while you get to know that person and the fantasy is shattered, they turn out to be somebody who isn't perfect (hence the disappointment and pain). The infatuation can't last, after longer periods you get bored. People stay together out of fear that they will be alone and don't want to risk trying to find excitement. I don't wish to sound like a bitter cynic (but I do), but my parents were together for fifteen years before my mother finally got the cougage to leave my dad... he was boring and a complete waste of skin. Monogemous relationships don't last, love seems to be too much hard work. The romance nearly always dies. Humans are simply animals, and it is rare that a species of animals selects a mating partner for life. I think that love is a social factor, I don't really believe in God or this life-long desire to be with the same person.
Now, heres a theory, and its based on evolutionary and scientific fact. Men produce on average between 50 and 150 million sperm per ejaculation! With 100 million sperm every time you shoot, a single man could produce enough individual sperm cells to repopulate the entire planet in a week. One man.
Men, it appears, are generally less choosy about sexual partners because they can have significantly more offspring than a women. Attractive features include a generally youthful healthy physical appearance, this would give any males future offspring the optimum chance of survival. It's all about spreading the seed, the more children you have, the more of your own genetic information lives on. Men are designed with maximum reproduction in mind.
Women can't have nearly as many offspring as a man. Thus, they are more selective in a partner because it is important that he can help them survive (passing on their own genetic information). Women, so research has shown, go less for attractive physical features and more on resourses and status. These are the optimally important factors as a father to a child from a mothers perspective. Monogemy would appear to benefit the mother's genetic survival as apposed to the father's.
It's survival of the fittest. Monogemy just doesn't fit into the male human biology. Science shows how men are designed to mate at great levels while women can not. Society has implaced this idea of "one man-one woman", but is it going against our natural urges? I realise I have totally dismissed love, but it doesn't seem to fit in with our biology.
Does love conquer all? Is monogemy really best? I'd like to hear from people who think they have really found love, could you really not live without that person. I understand love for a child, that fits into evolutionary scientific theory that you would care for a child as it is in essence part of yourself. Its just romantic love... can it last sucessfully?
What do you think? Am i a bitter old sod? (I am not attempting to be purposefully sexist- I appologise for any comments that appear to contradict this).
Do you believe in romantic love? I don't, monogemy seems pretty stupid. It seems to me that the initial feeling of love is infatuation. You are convinced that this person is perfect, and you desperately want it to be true. After a while you get to know that person and the fantasy is shattered, they turn out to be somebody who isn't perfect (hence the disappointment and pain). The infatuation can't last, after longer periods you get bored. People stay together out of fear that they will be alone and don't want to risk trying to find excitement. I don't wish to sound like a bitter cynic (but I do), but my parents were together for fifteen years before my mother finally got the cougage to leave my dad... he was boring and a complete waste of skin. Monogemous relationships don't last, love seems to be too much hard work. The romance nearly always dies. Humans are simply animals, and it is rare that a species of animals selects a mating partner for life. I think that love is a social factor, I don't really believe in God or this life-long desire to be with the same person.
Now, heres a theory, and its based on evolutionary and scientific fact. Men produce on average between 50 and 150 million sperm per ejaculation! With 100 million sperm every time you shoot, a single man could produce enough individual sperm cells to repopulate the entire planet in a week. One man.
Men, it appears, are generally less choosy about sexual partners because they can have significantly more offspring than a women. Attractive features include a generally youthful healthy physical appearance, this would give any males future offspring the optimum chance of survival. It's all about spreading the seed, the more children you have, the more of your own genetic information lives on. Men are designed with maximum reproduction in mind.
Women can't have nearly as many offspring as a man. Thus, they are more selective in a partner because it is important that he can help them survive (passing on their own genetic information). Women, so research has shown, go less for attractive physical features and more on resourses and status. These are the optimally important factors as a father to a child from a mothers perspective. Monogemy would appear to benefit the mother's genetic survival as apposed to the father's.
It's survival of the fittest. Monogemy just doesn't fit into the male human biology. Science shows how men are designed to mate at great levels while women can not. Society has implaced this idea of "one man-one woman", but is it going against our natural urges? I realise I have totally dismissed love, but it doesn't seem to fit in with our biology.
Does love conquer all? Is monogemy really best? I'd like to hear from people who think they have really found love, could you really not live without that person. I understand love for a child, that fits into evolutionary scientific theory that you would care for a child as it is in essence part of yourself. Its just romantic love... can it last sucessfully?
What do you think? Am i a bitter old sod? (I am not attempting to be purposefully sexist- I appologise for any comments that appear to contradict this).
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Comments
well sorry, but love can't be touched, seen, or even understood. But if it doesn't exist then explain all those people who after 50 years of marriage r still deeply in love, and i know a few. Sometimes love ends, because somethings changed, and things aren't what they were, maybe they were never in love at all. But if u really need proof, its said that people in love all have a certain chemical in their blood, so i guess that shows there's something there.
Devon
The earth is made of dirt and wood, and I'd be water if I could
So thus I could get this neuro-chemical or hormone or whatever it is, and simulate the feelings of love without the dissappiontment and pain of the inevitable break up? That would be sweet.
"Excellent!" <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/Gif/burns.gif">
drugs may be the road to nowhere, but at least there the scenic route
Although a lot of what you said did make sense, i think you'll change your mind when u do meet and fall in love with someone.
xxxs
No man is worth your tears, and the one who is wont make you cry.
Isn't that chocolate? and yes it is sweet.
Stella Artois always has an effect on me, I suddenly feel like I'm in love with all the ladies around me, even the large ones.
<IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/confused.gif">
id like to believe so, the trouble is finding that person and realising it too.
anyone found that ideal partner and if so where did u look cos i want mine!
I believe in love, it just hasn't ever really happened for me. I'm considering giving up, it dosen't seem like the right thing to do anyway. Playing the field, that seems much more appealing at the minute.
Plenty of fish in the sea? I'm testing the waters around me at the moment, only getting a few bites. Mostly whales with the odd trout. Hopefully, after this weekend I'll be knee deep (in my waders) with a frisky fresh dish that I will give a regular filleting, right up to her gills... <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/eek.gif"> I've taken this analigy way too far, haven't I? <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">
I dunnno if love is strictly natural or not, but I think it is...the idea is that two parents can care for the children, obne providing maternal needs and the other providing food, etc, from hunting. A child needs two parents (sorry single parents) so thats whats loves for <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">
It matters not who won or lost, but how you place the blame.
Good answer Kermit, I agree.
<IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/badrazz.gif"> It's all in the tounge, baby! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/badrazz.gif">
You spell tongue like tongue not tounge. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">
It matters not who won or lost, but how you place the blame.
Because if men just went around shagging every woman on Earth, imangine how woman would feel! - used and worthless. Having children or sex has to have meaning other wise it becomes cheap and pointless.
Being in love isnt thinking your bf/gf is perfect (although that may happen, as u say, if u go thru a stage of being 'infatuated') - it's just knowing they're perfect for you.
You can love someone while knowing their faults, and also when you love someone, monogamy just isn't an issue - cos u don't have any desire to cheat on them, cos u're quite happy with them.
are u saying u don't believe love is a common thing? or u've never been in love? or it doesn't exist? did u ever love ure parents, or do u love ure friends? it's a sad thing not to believe love exists cos u miss out on a whole part of life.
I used to be schizophrenic, but we're OK now...
Because I want more stars.