If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
another friends & rlships question
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
following on from the threads we have had recently about balancing friends and partners.. it seems many people on here have experienced it when a friend gets a new partner and subsequently ignores everyone else - my question is, how do you change this or tell your friend she's ignoring you without causing an argument?
I live in a house with 3 others and we are all very good friends as well as housemates. One girl recently got a new partner and since then we have hardly seen her, she spends all her spare time out doing things as a couple and doesnt come home most nights. we try to include her in things like we always did but she is just not interested in anything any more. last weekend we invited her out with 2 of us (saying she could be her girlfriend along too). she came, but just looked miserable and checked her phone every 5 secs for texts then left after a couple of hours.
last week we told her we are all having dinner together on sunday (so giving her almost a week's notice) at around 7pm and we would like to see her as we havent seen her for ages. she turned up just at 7pm, ate dinner with us then disappeared immediately afterwards to go and talk to her girlfriend on the phone for the rest of the night.
Dont get me wrong, I am really really happy for her that she has found someone that she feels strongly for and everything is going well for her but we just miss her and are a bit miffed at being ignored. I know other friends of hers are feeling the same too.
how do we get her attention back or tell her how we feel without her feeling 'forced' to spend time with us or that we are trying to stop her relationship?
I live in a house with 3 others and we are all very good friends as well as housemates. One girl recently got a new partner and since then we have hardly seen her, she spends all her spare time out doing things as a couple and doesnt come home most nights. we try to include her in things like we always did but she is just not interested in anything any more. last weekend we invited her out with 2 of us (saying she could be her girlfriend along too). she came, but just looked miserable and checked her phone every 5 secs for texts then left after a couple of hours.
last week we told her we are all having dinner together on sunday (so giving her almost a week's notice) at around 7pm and we would like to see her as we havent seen her for ages. she turned up just at 7pm, ate dinner with us then disappeared immediately afterwards to go and talk to her girlfriend on the phone for the rest of the night.
Dont get me wrong, I am really really happy for her that she has found someone that she feels strongly for and everything is going well for her but we just miss her and are a bit miffed at being ignored. I know other friends of hers are feeling the same too.
how do we get her attention back or tell her how we feel without her feeling 'forced' to spend time with us or that we are trying to stop her relationship?
0
Comments
If it's such a 'bad case' of being 'addicted' (sorry, words fail me today), to someone, you can't do anything, since she would forsake all of you, before she turns her back on her partner for a minute.
Just don't block her out, after a while, when the first enthusiasm wears off she will see that the one-sided life with just one person to meet up will become stale.
This article could help:
http://www.thesite.org.uk/sexandrelationships/familyandfriends/friendship/whenmatesgobad