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What a mess!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Im in such a pickle.
Ive had really strong feelings for someone, for about 6 months. This person is a friend of mine who goes to the same uni. This uni is over a 3 hour drive away from my home-home. Im returning to my home-home tomorrow and he's returning to his, which is about 5 hours from my home-home.
We've both been really drunk lately while enjoying our last few days at uni. When i woke up with him beside me in bed about a week ago, and had no recallation of how he got there, i begun to wonder if he had any feelings back. We got drunk again thursday night and he made a move on me while in bed together again. I enjoyed it and didnt think much of it because we were both very drunk.
The following morning he decided he wanted to talk about it, said he enjoyed it, and that he's had feelings for a long time. Turns out i wasnt the only one too scared to admit it. I truly had no idea he felt the same way about me, and he had no idea i did either.
So basically, we both move home tomorrow now knowing that we like eachother as more than friends, and i feel so crap because i wish all this had happened months ago.
I feel like im going to die when i leave tomorrow. I'll see him at uni graduation and thats it. A long distance thing couldnt work.
I feel really happy that i finally know how he feels, and really chuffed that i liked someone who liked me back but at the same time if i hadnt known it may not hurt so much.
I dont think ive ever liked anyone this much before. All i have to do is look at his face and i'll feel tingly!
Tonight is our last night together, but its really wierd. When we're close and stuff i just clam up and kind of freeze. Ive always had this problem with other people too but this time its worse because i like this one so much more. It seems the more i like someone, the less i am physically able to do with them.
He says i look scared all the time when we're close, and to be honest its true. But i dont know why. I fancy the pants off him and i want to make the most of this last night, but i freeze and i dont know why! The chance of anything more "intimate" happening is 0% because im too scared.
Well thats my rant over, i dont really know what i want from saying all this, i guess its just good to let it all out as i feel so crap. Any feedback appreciated.
Maybe i just need a slap round the face to snap out of it?
Oh and one final comment, if theres any replies can you please not quote me as i may need to edit bits out due to privacy reasons at a later date, cheers :wave:
Ive had really strong feelings for someone, for about 6 months. This person is a friend of mine who goes to the same uni. This uni is over a 3 hour drive away from my home-home. Im returning to my home-home tomorrow and he's returning to his, which is about 5 hours from my home-home.
We've both been really drunk lately while enjoying our last few days at uni. When i woke up with him beside me in bed about a week ago, and had no recallation of how he got there, i begun to wonder if he had any feelings back. We got drunk again thursday night and he made a move on me while in bed together again. I enjoyed it and didnt think much of it because we were both very drunk.
The following morning he decided he wanted to talk about it, said he enjoyed it, and that he's had feelings for a long time. Turns out i wasnt the only one too scared to admit it. I truly had no idea he felt the same way about me, and he had no idea i did either.
So basically, we both move home tomorrow now knowing that we like eachother as more than friends, and i feel so crap because i wish all this had happened months ago.
I feel like im going to die when i leave tomorrow. I'll see him at uni graduation and thats it. A long distance thing couldnt work.
I feel really happy that i finally know how he feels, and really chuffed that i liked someone who liked me back but at the same time if i hadnt known it may not hurt so much.
I dont think ive ever liked anyone this much before. All i have to do is look at his face and i'll feel tingly!
Tonight is our last night together, but its really wierd. When we're close and stuff i just clam up and kind of freeze. Ive always had this problem with other people too but this time its worse because i like this one so much more. It seems the more i like someone, the less i am physically able to do with them.
He says i look scared all the time when we're close, and to be honest its true. But i dont know why. I fancy the pants off him and i want to make the most of this last night, but i freeze and i dont know why! The chance of anything more "intimate" happening is 0% because im too scared.
Well thats my rant over, i dont really know what i want from saying all this, i guess its just good to let it all out as i feel so crap. Any feedback appreciated.
Maybe i just need a slap round the face to snap out of it?
Oh and one final comment, if theres any replies can you please not quote me as i may need to edit bits out due to privacy reasons at a later date, cheers :wave:
0
Comments
I know LDRs are very hard work, but why can't you have a go? Three hours isn't such a very long time if the will is there.
I know its easy to say you need to loosen up, but you do. He's made it clear he likes you, you've got on as mates for such a long time, it'd be a shame to throw that away because you think three hours is the end of the earth. It's a pain, sure, but it's more than doable if he's worth it.
Don't be afraid of it failing. If you're too scared to try it then it will definitely fail; if you give it a go who knows what could happen? You won't lose anything by trying. Try and remember that.
Im not sure about long distance. Ive been there and done it before and although it worked out for nearly 3 years i dont think i could go through it again. Im not even sure how he feels about anything regarding the future.
Ive wanted this for so long and i never dreamed it would happen, ever. For months ive been wishing it would, now it finally has i feel like im going to blow it.
Its overwhelming, and almost unreal. I feel confused as to how to act, we're not a couple yet have been friends for so long my mind is so messed up about which way to act in general.
good luck!
i wouldnt just both go your seperate ways and call it an end tho. you could regret it.
I get scared when I really like someone, its as if i don't want them to find out that I'm not as witty/pretty/smart as they think I am. Its the fear of letting someone in, I have my little comfort zone and don't want to unsettle it. Its much easier for me to act like I dont give a shit and be unemotional than admitting I really like someone.
I say go for it and relax, be yourself.
Like others have said, if you work hard the distance will work out.
Good luck!
worst case scenario, everything goes horribly wrong, and you only have to face him once in your life. unlikely though, given the circumstances.
if you freeze cause you're all weird about yourself, tell him that. if you're worried about blowing it all, tell him you're worried about blowing it all.
from the sound of things, this guy is too important to you to tit it all up by not taking a chance.
That's fine, I thought it would be something along those lines.
Whose expectations are you afraid of not living up to? His? He seems interested in you, and sure, it may all fail, but how will you know unless you try?
I know for a fact you will regret not doing something far far more than you will regret doing something and it all going wrong in the end.
You're contradicting yourself you know.
You want it to work out and be shiny happy forever, but at the same time you don't want to give it a stab. It might fail disastrously- of course it might- but it won't do it straight away unless you don't give it a go.
You know that not trying is the biggest failure, yet you are afraid of failure. I do understand why, you just need to have more faith. Easier said than done, I know.
I think what kaff's said is probably the best. Tell him what you've told us, give it all a stab. Don't think its a goodbye, just think that you'll be moving on. try and take him with you, and if he can't do that in the end, then at least you can sit back and know that you tried.
You will regret not trying far more, so try and focus on that rather than any fears of heartbreak. He seems too important to you to not at least try.
Im going to try my best to snap out of it and make the most of this evening.
three hours shmee hours!
But i did however make the most of the evening, and im pretty sure that shows that im interested
It looks like we wont be seeing eachother any more unless we happen to be in the same place at the same time (gathered from when he said he'll miss me because we wont really see eachother again)
Although its going to hurt to leave, im glad that we've both enjoyed ourselves over the last few days and also its better than leaving, not knowing how he feels and be kicking myself forever for not attempting to find out.
Overall not a bad result. Cheers for all advice
I feel crap. So very crap. And i only arrive at my home-home about an hour ago.
Dont know what to do with myself. I feel lost