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Confused with living situation after uni

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
This is rather long but i need to let it all out and see what other people think!

Im feeling really confused, lost, and wierd.

I finish uni next month. im at uni in lincoln, where im having a great time with my uni friends and housemates.

At home (norwich) is where my family is, and my oldest friends. But these friends never want to do anything and have got quite boring. They are good friends to me but they seem to have got set in their ways and never want to go out in the city, they just want to sit at the local every single week at the same time, same seats, same drinks, same people.

Its always been the plan that after uni i will return to norwich. But after my final year i just dont want uni to end. My friends up in lincoln are up for doing things.

Yet i cant stay in lincoln because theres no point, my friends wouldnt be there even if i was to stay there because they are all returning to their hometowns which are scattered all over the uk.

Yet i dont want to return "home" to norwich where i live with my family (who completely do my head in) yet i cant yet afford to move out.

I dont know what to do. I feel lost, crap, like i have nowhere to go, nowhere i can be happy. I just want uni to carry on forever, im so happy at uni as i am, why does it have to end :crying:

This is making me feel so crap, because i have no control over it. I would love to stay living in lincoln if my friends were too. I love norwich as a place but i feel like ive moved on from my friends: they are happy as they are but i cant live like that. I want a bit of excitement in my life.

Ive been considering the idea of living with my family for the summer while i get a job and sort myself out, then looking for a graduate house share in norwich where hopefully i'll meet new friends. But i dont know. I know for sure that i cant afford to move out on my own, and even if i did i would get so lonely and i love living with other people my age. My old friends would never move out from their parents yet so thats not an option.

But then again i could do the whole house-share thing in lincoln too, but i guess there would be no point because yeh i could make new friends but i would have to keep travelling down to norwich to see family and old friends aswell.

What do i do? Be in a city where my friends dont want to go out, or be in a city where my friends have left? Shall i do the graduate house-share thing with a load of people ive never met before?

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Christ I've literally just had a conversation saying all that ... its so similar its freaky ... especially about the moving on from your mates at home.

    'fraid I can't help you because I'm at a loss to. I know if I can possibly avoid moving home I will but I'm not sure how I'll be able to manage it.

    Come live in the golden triangle ... its a bohemian paradise :p
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Its nice to know im not the only one feeling so lost about it all.

    Let me know if you come up with anything! Have you considered the whole graduate house share with strangers thing? Im beginning to think thats my only option...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah welcome to the end of uni. It's shit. Some friends of mine who lived together at uni decided to get a house in Cardiff together, but that only works if you all want to live in the same city. Everyone else seemed to move home or go travelling and everyone's complaining, so I'd say if you can stay in touch with your uni friends, then do it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm With Stupid wrote:
    Yeah welcome to the end of uni. It's shit. Some friends of mine who lived together at uni decided to get a house in Cardiff together, but that only works if you all want to live in the same city. Everyone else seemed to move home or go travelling and everyone's complaining, so I'd say if you can stay in touch with your uni friends, then do it.

    I'll definitly be staying in touch with them, but we are all dispersing....i'd stay if they were but they dont want to
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Blah wrote:
    I'll definitly be staying in touch with them, but we are all dispersing....i'd stay if they were but they dont want to

    You've pretty much answered your own post, because of this and the other fact that you said you can't afford to move out.

    Firstly, you need to look at whatever job you want to do once you finish uni, and find out what the market is like in the places you might live in.
    Second, consider sounding out your friends at uni to see if they would want to stay and house-share with you if you can afford that.
    Third, remember that nothing is that permanent just now - you can always move back to your folks and then move out again fairly soon afterwards.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Blah wrote:
    This is rather long but i need to let it all out and see what other people think!

    Im feeling really confused, lost, and wierd.

    I finish uni next month. im at uni in lincoln, where im having a great time with my uni friends and housemates.

    At home (norwich) is where my family is, and my oldest friends. But these friends never want to do anything and have got quite boring. They are good friends to me but they seem to have got set in their ways and never want to go out in the city, they just want to sit at the local every single week at the same time, same seats, same drinks, same people.

    Its always been the plan that after uni i will return to norwich. But after my final year i just dont want uni to end. My friends up in lincoln are up for doing things.

    Yet i cant stay in lincoln because theres no point, my friends wouldnt be there even if i was to stay there because they are all returning to their hometowns which are scattered all over the uk.

    Yet i dont want to return "home" to norwich where i live with my family (who completely do my head in) yet i cant yet afford to move out.

    I dont know what to do. I feel lost, crap, like i have nowhere to go, nowhere i can be happy. I just want uni to carry on forever, im so happy at uni as i am, why does it have to end :crying:

    This is making me feel so crap, because i have no control over it. I would love to stay living in lincoln if my friends were too. I love norwich as a place but i feel like ive moved on from my friends: they are happy as they are but i cant live like that. I want a bit of excitement in my life.

    Ive been considering the idea of living with my family for the summer while i get a job and sort myself out, then looking for a graduate house share in norwich where hopefully i'll meet new friends. But i dont know. I know for sure that i cant afford to move out on my own, and even if i did i would get so lonely and i love living with other people my age. My old friends would never move out from their parents yet so thats not an option.

    But then again i could do the whole house-share thing in lincoln too, but i guess there would be no point because yeh i could make new friends but i would have to keep travelling down to norwich to see family and old friends aswell.

    What do i do? Be in a city where my friends dont want to go out, or be in a city where my friends have left? Shall i do the graduate house-share thing with a load of people ive never met before?


    OMG

    Do you know Rebecca Cross from Norwich?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ah I feel exactly the same as you, would absolutely love to keep on living with my freinds from uni but it isnt possible due to one going travelling and the other two (and me!) not being able to afford it. I reckon Im probably going to live at home for about 6 months while i find a job and then either move in with friends from home or uni if they are up for it and want to live in the same kind of area as me or just find a house share in london. I think many poeple feel the same though, leaving uni is a very scary prospect!
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