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What would you do?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
What would you do if there were various rumours going around your school (or workplace/whatever) that your long-term boyfriend had slept with one of your mates?
I'm not sure who started them, some people are saying that it was on numerous occassions, others are saying he forced into doing it, i.e. raped her. Some are saying that she said so herself, but then it could have been started by others.
I don't know what to do, because it feels like everyone is talking about me and him, and that they think I'm a muppet to stay with him. I don't believe he would ever force anyone into anything, as his mum was raped a while back and it really brought him down. He says he hasn't done a thing, which I would normally believe, but people are saying that it did actually happen etc etc.
The girl in question is a girl in my gang who I've known for a few years. I'm not really close mates with her but shes part of my social circle. I know she fancies my bf, and she's just broken up with her bf of 2 years, but I see no reason for her to lie about anything - its not as if we're enemies, or she has anything against me. They slept next to each other in a room full of people a few weeks back, and he says she kept calling him her ex's name, and staring at him as he tried to get to sleep
.
I really don't know what to do. I haven't spoken about it to her yet, as I'm kinda shy, and I'd feel stupid to accuse her of anything. But she obviously knows this has been going around because she's been quite nervous around me, and avoiding eye contact.
I find it hard to think that my bf has cheated on me with her, because hes never shown any interest in getting to know her, and is really self-conscious himself - he's not into getting intimate with someone so soon. And he's had so many offers from really high class girls while hes been with me, and has never taken it further.
But when so many people are saying the opposite... I just feel really embarrassed and unsure. I don't like to think of him lying to me. Just thinking about what could have happened gets me very upset.
Any advice please?
I'm not sure who started them, some people are saying that it was on numerous occassions, others are saying he forced into doing it, i.e. raped her. Some are saying that she said so herself, but then it could have been started by others.
I don't know what to do, because it feels like everyone is talking about me and him, and that they think I'm a muppet to stay with him. I don't believe he would ever force anyone into anything, as his mum was raped a while back and it really brought him down. He says he hasn't done a thing, which I would normally believe, but people are saying that it did actually happen etc etc.
The girl in question is a girl in my gang who I've known for a few years. I'm not really close mates with her but shes part of my social circle. I know she fancies my bf, and she's just broken up with her bf of 2 years, but I see no reason for her to lie about anything - its not as if we're enemies, or she has anything against me. They slept next to each other in a room full of people a few weeks back, and he says she kept calling him her ex's name, and staring at him as he tried to get to sleep
.I really don't know what to do. I haven't spoken about it to her yet, as I'm kinda shy, and I'd feel stupid to accuse her of anything. But she obviously knows this has been going around because she's been quite nervous around me, and avoiding eye contact.
I find it hard to think that my bf has cheated on me with her, because hes never shown any interest in getting to know her, and is really self-conscious himself - he's not into getting intimate with someone so soon. And he's had so many offers from really high class girls while hes been with me, and has never taken it further.
But when so many people are saying the opposite... I just feel really embarrassed and unsure. I don't like to think of him lying to me. Just thinking about what could have happened gets me very upset.
Any advice please?
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Comments
hope it all works out ok!
I'd find it easier to believe him if I didn't know she fancied him so much, or that he was a bit of a one with the ladies in the past. But I guess thats no reason for me not to trust him now.
I don't leave school till the 21st of June, and my proms on the 30th. We don't even get study leave! Tsk.
Oh babe im sorry to hear this but you have got to get up the courage to go up to her and ask her straight out, this kinda stuff could make or break a relationship.
You must find the truth from somewhere and by the sounds of it she is the only one who can give you that truth.
By the sounds of it, she's trying to split you and your boyfriend up. And by rumours going around like this, she'll get what she wants. And rumours suck - I've had at least 4 go around about me in the last year or so. One was about me being pregnant, which is impossible since I've never slept with anyone... :rolleyes:
Thing is, I have no idea why she'd want to split us up.. I mean, its not as if he'd be interested in her after all this. Shes always been a nice girl - I get on with her okay. I mean, to say he practically raped her
I'm not sure what I'd say to her anyway. It feels like I've left it a bit to say 'Have you heard what people have been saying about you and Brandon..'. I'm such a ninny. Anyone else would have stormed up to her by now and demanded the truth :yeees:.