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Kissing Other Girls...But Still Interested?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
So...if anyone has been unfortunate enough to be keeping up with me and my silly love life they would know that I really like a guy, who I recently saw on a night out, but was getting off with his ex. I got over that, they were drunk, and I was advised that it was nothing.

So, we then went to the cinema, and he asked if I wanted to do something again some other time. I said, yes, of course, so we're going out this week. Dunno if he meant just as friends or as a bit of a date.

Either way, he's been very fliratious with me and male and female friends have said that all the signs are there (as have some members of the board!) But last night he said he was going to 'say hi' to someone. The moment I turned around, he was kissing some girl. I'm so gutted and humiliated and I feel pretty rejected.

What is going on? Is he just a bit of a flirt? Of a womaniser? Is there any chance that he might like me? Or am I wasting my time with something that will likely never turn into a relationship?

It's all so confusing and stupid. I just wanna know what to do and where to go. I have a very bad habit of running away with an idea and getting carried away with my feelings.

Any help would be great!
xox

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Anybody...?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It sounds like you're wasting your time to be honest. Why would you be interested in this guy if he did that to you? You should stand up for yourself, either tell him to sort his shit out, or forget about him.

    There are lots of blokes about that wouldn't do that. So why put up with this nob when you could find someone much better??
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It sounds like you're wasting your time to be honest. Why would you be interested in this guy if he did that to you? You should stand up for yourself, either tell him to sort his shit out, or forget about him.

    There are lots of blokes about that wouldn't do that. So why put up with this nob when you could find someone much better??

    :yes: he sounds like a nob and dont put up with him
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He sounds like a complete idiot. Even though you're not in a relationship he could at least have the decency not to snog other girls right in front of you. If he really liked you or even respected you then I don't think he would be doing this, and even if he did stop I don't think it bodes well for a possible later relationship.

    My advice: find someone else who has the decency not to be over another girl all evening!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks guys... I think I've just been waiting to hear from someone else what I've been thinking. It just hurts. This guy has been nothing but good to me (apart from this) and he's been the only person I've been remotely interested in for a while.

    I wish I could find someone decent!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Okay... so I had an online conversation with me, where it was revealed he's been staying at a 'friend's' since that happened last night. He said he wondered where I disappeared... because he was gonna ask me to join them. And I didn't say bye. So I just told him that I didn't wanna stand about and watch and wait till he was done.

    ARGH! I just feel so mad now! More at myself than anything!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Unless you're actually together you can't expect to be the centre of his attention. If he's shown interest then the balls in your court - it's up to you to take the initiative and establish a relationship.

    My advice would be to play it cool & don't let it show that you're flustered - snappy phonecalls aren't a good idea. He will know that it's getting to you, which will either diminish respect or cause him considerable amusement. Basically, it's a no-win scenario.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He sounds like a young man, to be very honest.

    Even though he likes you, he isn't going to not kiss anyone else just because of it. He doesn't owe you monogamy, and you won't get it.

    Make a move on him, he isn't going to stand around waiting. He's young, he's attractive, he's going to get off with girls.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    do you think he may be trying to make you jealous? it seems from what you say that even though he was kissing another girl, he was concerned about where you were because he was going to ask you to go with them.

    what kermit says is true, but i think if he's a good friend and he's pretty aware you like him, or he likes you, then its not a very nice way to act IMHO.

    hope it turns out how you want.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sugar wrote:
    what kermit says is true, but i think if he's a good friend and he's pretty aware you like him, or he likes you, then its not a very nice way to act IMHO.

    It's not the nicest way to act, but it's something more people than you'd think do.

    I know I did.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah... that's all true...

    I'm just pretty fecking stupid..

    But yah, it's all good now. Things will happen as they do, so I'm cool.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well, well, well... Things took a -very- interesting turn of events!
    I've spoken to his ex a couple of times, and she's a really great person. As it turns out this girl he was kissing was the girl that he was cheating on his ex with.
    I'm just happy that things happened this way, rather than the possibility of me being hurt even more further down the line. I can't be doing with guys that cheat. It's happened to me every time, and I hate it.

    Thanks guys. I think I'll enjoy just being me for a while, and try not to get too lonely!

    No doubt I'll post again some time soon with some silly little problem or questions for y'all!
    xox
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's what the boards are for.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IWishIWas wrote:
    Thanks guys. I think I'll enjoy just being me for a while, and try not to get too lonely!

    great attitude! Better to be a happy single than a mug!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Does sound like a total cock. Dont go there. I was in a similar situation a while back. They are not worth a second of your time!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Girl power all the way! Heheh!

    xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fairy wrote:
    Does sound like a total cock. Dont go there. I was in a similar situation a while back. They are not worth a second of your time!

    So being single and getting off with people equates to being a total cock because someone else has a crush on you? Bizarre! :yeees:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Spliffie wrote:
    So being single and getting off with people equates to being a total cock because someone else has a crush on you? Bizarre! :yeees:

    No... but cheating on your girlfriend is. Leading people on straight afterwards and messing around with someone in front of your ex does too.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    IWishIWas wrote:
    No... but cheating on your girlfriend is.

    Maybe. Depends entirely on circumstances.
    Leading people on straight afterwards and messing around with someone in front of your ex does too.

    What's wrong with leading someone on straight afterwards? If you have no commitment to them...and you've made it obvious you aren't exclusively chasing them...then i don't see the problem.

    Same with messing around in front of your ex. What are you supposed to do in a boozer or a club, hide from them? :confused:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Spliffie wrote:
    Maybe. Depends entirely on circumstances.



    What's wrong with leading someone on straight afterwards? If you have no commitment to them...and you've made it obvious you aren't exclusively chasing them...then i don't see the problem.

    Same with messing around in front of your ex. What are you supposed to do in a boozer or a club, hide from them? :confused:


    The whole situation is a long story and too complicated. I can't be bothered explaining it all.

    There's nothing wrong with messing around. But cheating on a girlfriend who dotes on you, after he persuaded her to go into the relationship in the first place, it just isn't good.
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