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how long does it take..?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Not that im trying rush things,
but
how long do you think you would be with someone before you knew that you were in love with them?
And from a blokes point of view-ones who arent great with feelings and relationship taslk stuff, how soon is SCARY to be told that you love them??

I think that i love my boyfriend, but i don't quite know whether im in love with him if tha makes sense.
And i do want to be, but before i think i've been more infatuated by my boyfriends rather than loved them so the feeling ihave now could be love... :chin: lol
im kinda hopeless to be honest!

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    if it sdifferent to feelings you've had in the past, then it could be love! But i wouldnt rush to tell him. how long have you been with him? Doy ou have any clues to suggest he feels the same way??
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no lol hes totally rubbish about telling me how he feels.
    We havent been together that long (6months) and i wouldnt even consider telling him without being totally sure.
    When hes ready to tell me i guess then hes sure.

    All i know is when im with him, i wanna stay with him all the time. and nothing else matters. Its the best feeling :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well make the most of it, bcos it does sound like the start of love!! you never know, he may feel the same, but be too scared to tel you. So, just wait, only time will tell!!
    Me+my b.f fell in love quite quickly, but it was very scary for me at first, but i stuck at it!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've always found it very difficult to differentiate between love and infatuation, as you seem to know. I've thought I was in love millions of times (just a wee exagerration there ;) ) and then in hindsight realised it was infatuation...though when you have the benefit of hindsight it's hard to tell whether you're just downplaying your feelings because you were hurt when you broke up. If that makes sense.

    Anyway, I'm not able to tell you whether you love him and neither is anyone else here. I'd recommend taking your time and exploring your feelings before blurting anything out, especially if he is hesitant to talk about feelings and emotional stuff. Obviously, as sugar_mouse said, you missed out a vital piece of information - how long have you been a couple? If you've been together for two months and you tell him you love him then there's a lot of potential for him to be terrified (and that doesn't just apply to men). However, some people do know how they feel after that long...some people say they knew this was "the one" as soon as they said hi, or knew they loved their other half after three dates.

    Knowing when you love someone isn't something you can judge by other people's experiences, it's entirely personal. At least that's what I think. ;)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    lexijb wrote:
    All i know is when im with him, i wanna stay with him all the time. and nothing else matters. Its the best feeling :)

    How lovely. :heart:

    You don't need to define that feeling as anything, to be honest. Just bask in the glow of being happy and enjoying being together. You can't beat it!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've been with my boyfriend for 6 months... we've not actually said to each other 'i love you', mainly because he's not the sort of guy to talk about his feelings, but also because I'm quite shy, but i know that we love each other, without having to say it out loud, if you get what i mean? We show it more through what we do for each other than what we say, which to us is more important.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Also if you were friends beforehand, it might happen a lot quicker because there won't be the long period of getting to know them first. It would be interesting to do a poll to those in a relationship as to roughly when they first said/realised they were in love.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well I was gonna do a poll, but I can't work out how. Can someone tell me?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    done one. you have to click the box that says "yes,post a poll" just above submit new threads. then it allows you to chose the options, etc.
    (Just wanted to check id done it right b4 i told you)
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