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taking an ex back?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Now I know there is a reason for why you broke up in the first place, but what if that problem was out of your control and doesn't exist now?
So many people have different views on this. Some will never go back, whereas others get back with their ex and live happily ever after.
I broke up with my ex a few months ago, basically to help him, even though he didn't want to. But I'm still in love with him. He really loved me as well, but our break up affected him badly and he's hardened himself towards me in the romantic sense. He knows I want him back but he's asking for time. At first he was really resistant, adamant that he wouldn't allow me to hurt him again. But then I asked him if he'd be happier if I just gave up and he said he doesn't know. ARGH!
Let me hear your success stories to give me some hope! I don't mind the sad stories either!
So many people have different views on this. Some will never go back, whereas others get back with their ex and live happily ever after.
I broke up with my ex a few months ago, basically to help him, even though he didn't want to. But I'm still in love with him. He really loved me as well, but our break up affected him badly and he's hardened himself towards me in the romantic sense. He knows I want him back but he's asking for time. At first he was really resistant, adamant that he wouldn't allow me to hurt him again. But then I asked him if he'd be happier if I just gave up and he said he doesn't know. ARGH!
Let me hear your success stories to give me some hope! I don't mind the sad stories either!
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Comments
But then again my mate took her fella back, he had cheated on her and she dumped him, then she took him back and he cheated on her again :rolleyes: but it depends on the circumstatnces why you split in the first tme!
Good luck!
never take back someone that cheated on you though!
I totally agree with you.
Very true.
I went back to my (now once again) ex, and things worked...for a while. When we split up the second time it was for a completely different reason and we were happy in the interim period. In retrospect, going back to him was a ridiculous thing to do, but you have to make your own decision - nobody has the rule book or knows the cheats when love's the game, try and listen to a healthy combination of your head and heart.
If you do go back to him then don't do it on his terms, don't feel guilty about things you've both said and done in the past. I'm of the opinion that it has to be almost like an entirely new relationship - don't just slip back into a comfortable relationship. If you think that newly single, on the market you would single this fella out for a relationship then go for it, start afresh etc etc. I know you love him and it's hard, but it might just be better to draw a line under it and move on - for now. Maybe when he gets over feeling hurt, and softens toward you a little then there's a chance of happy reconciliation.
On a happy note, a non-horror story. One of my best friends got back together with her ex after 18 months apart (he dropped out of Uni, got into loads of debt...long story to that break-up) and they're getting hitched this summer. So it does work out, shared history is a powerful thing...you just need to decipher whether it needs to stay in the past (as a valuable lesson) or not.