If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Ditching the condoms
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Helloo :wave:
A recent survey by playing safely.co.uk revealed that only one in five 16-30 year-olds get tested for STIs before they stop using condoms in a relationship and 73% don't ask their new partenr about their sexual history.
I'm keen to write an article about this and was wondering what your opinions/experiences are?
- When do/did you ditch the condoms when you enter in a relationship? Have you felt pressured to do so by your new partner?
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Would be great to hear you views.
Ta
A recent survey by playing safely.co.uk revealed that only one in five 16-30 year-olds get tested for STIs before they stop using condoms in a relationship and 73% don't ask their new partenr about their sexual history.
I'm keen to write an article about this and was wondering what your opinions/experiences are?
- When do/did you ditch the condoms when you enter in a relationship? Have you felt pressured to do so by your new partner?
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Would be great to hear you views.
Ta
0
Comments
I think we first ditched the condoms because a) I went on the pill, and was always worried about them breaking anyway, and b) We both found them a huge turn-off.
Neither of us needed to get tested, as we were both virgins.. (my bf had fiddled around with other girls before, but they never did with him
It is a little worrying sometimes, only being on the pill, as sometimes I take it to early to get my period over and done with, and it mucks up my timing for the next month - I end up with a day or two of worrying whether I'm preggers. The clever thing to do would be using condoms aswell, but they're just so horrid.
we've been having sex over a year now and its sooo much better with out condoms
I was going out with my ex for about 2 months before we stopped using condoms and I went on the pill. I trusted him 100% and he never pressured me; was a joint decision.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
No, I didn't get tested before we stopped using them but before I'd always used condoms so assumed I'd be fine and he told me he was, too.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
No, I knew that if he'd had unprotected sex that he'd have got tested afterwards.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Yes. 1 lad I had to insist that he wore one and he wasn't pleased! Another was a drunken 1 night stand and we didn't use 1. I can't blame him fully though, I should've taken the initiative. Been tested since then.
We ditched condoms once I'd gone on the pill, about 7 months into our relationship. We'd slept together a couple of times and I felt I could trust him in that way.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
We were both virgins beforehand, and neither of us had gone any other sexual activities with other people either, so I suppose it never really crossed our minds. It should have done though. I'd definetely get tested if we broke up and I entered a new relationship - I'd make the lad as well or he's getting no where!
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
We'd talked about it before we were together, as friends, so we were pretty aware of each others past (or lack of), but had discussed it since as well.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
I once took the MAP as we were worried the condom had broken. It was a bit of a nightmare, as due to my extra GCSE subjects and school, I couldn't get to the Family Planning Clinic during it's opening times. My friend in the end had to go for me while I was in class. I don't know whether she just said it was for her or explained the situation..... but it was all such a nightmare, I think that was probably what finalised my decision to go on the pill.
about 4 months into the relationship, we has been using condoms and sleeping together for nearly 3 months, so it seemed like a good option
Do you go and get tested before doing so?
I didn't no because i had only slept with one guy before hand and we had always used condoms, same with my partner, i probably would have though if the gp had suggested it
Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Yeah i was aware of it long before we even slept together.
Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
No because i'm still with the same partner
Single
But in the past, i have used condoms until i was in the relationship properly and monogomously.
Usually when the girl i was with went on the pill or was already on the pill.
I always like to find out my partners sexual histories if i can do and im happy to share mine if asked by the girl im with.
I always use condoms with new partners or one night stands if one happens.
So far not had any tests, but never thought i needed to...so far.
We "ditched the condoms" last year which was about two years in but we hadn't been having sex the whole time as we live too far apart (he is in Brazil). I had always been on the pill as well anyway but had wanted to use condoms just to be sure.
In the past I have given gob-jobs to complete strangers who I had just meet without a condom. I didn't really know anything about the risks of oral sex in those days and would never have had the confidence to bring it up with any of the guys I was with.
I used to use condoms when giving my current boyfriend oral sex though because I was convinced that he was the type of boy who'd have some disease! But to an extent that was prejudiced of me (although I think the fact that you can't even give blood in the UK after being sexually active in Brazil may have put this thought in my head).
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
Ur... I haven't been tested. But I was a virgin before I got with my current boyfriend so it's a bit unlikely that I'd have anything... although I did give random blowjobs when I was younger so I probably should get tested.
He has been tested for HIV and some others as it was compulsory to be checked when he was in the army. I saw his test results from the hospital before we stopped using condoms which was basically a long list of diseases with the word 'negative' beside each one.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Yes. I knew exactly what he'd done and when and with whom before he got into my knickers. He knew I was a virgin but didn't ask about anything else in the early days (although he knows now).
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
No. I'd say that our sex is like 100% better without. We had to go back to condoms for a bit when I was on anti-biotics for a kidney problem and to be honest neither of us could really be bothered with rubber-insulated-sex after having had sex without a condom. But I do recognise the importance of condoms in general.
my boyfriend and i stopped using condoms 11months into our relationship, 7 months after losing our virginity to each other, i went on the depo provera injection, we had had one incident which made us concerned about the reliability of condoms, and we wanted to dispense with the fuss & expense of condoms, there was no pressure.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
we were both virgins beforehand, i had done a little bit of foreplay with a previous boyfriend, but he'd not been with anyone else, and that was it.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
i knew my boyfriend hadn't been with anyone else.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
No
We stopped using condoms about 2/3 months into the relationship, i didnt feel pressured he had asked before whether we could not use them anymore and i said no and he accepted that and waited till i was ready, he didnt mention it once after that untill i told him that i didnt want to use them anymore.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
No neither of us were tested,
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
We was aware of each other sexual history and that was probably the reason why neither of us were tested as we was careful in the past and aware.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
No problems at all.
We didn't use condoms at all in my current relationship. I'm on depo provera.
Do you go and get tested before doing so?
Nope. I should have done though.
Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Yes. I know a lot about it. Don't know so much about his history of using condoms though.
Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Yes. Chlamydia. Couple of pregnancy scares too - in the early days before I went on depo.
In my last relationship we'd had a couple of problems with condoms and neither of us really liked them so she went on the pill.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
In my last relationship we both did, we were both fairly sure we were clean, but we thought it couldn't hurt to check.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Yep we both asked and revealed our history to each other
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Not really, we just didn't like them
and I had actually asked my parents if there was anything nasty running in the family, embarressing question that was
Um about 6months into the relationship, a month after I went on the pill. Still used condoms most of the time. It was a mutual horny decision.
Do you go and get tested before doing so?
No, though we said we would incase of dormant stds. We are both eachothers first on everthing so no STDs...
Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Well yea... but we were both... (as I said above)
Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
Yes, I had a pregnancy scare because my period was going on 4days late and I'm on the pill. Turns out it was just the stress of starting school again. Im paranoid to not use condoms now, even though it isnt as good.
I were a virgin but he wasn't (shagged 3 others) Which does worry me because they were all unprotected, so for all I know, I MYSELF could have something now!
I wish he would get tested!! his reply is "I trusted them enough when they said they hadn't anything"
WTF? You just cant believe that! Is it just me?
Never used them with the current person for various reasons. Havent been that good at using them before either.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
No, But I really should do.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
Yes, I know quite a bit, but not quite enough.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front.
Nope. Should get tested for STI's at some point as I had quite a bit of unproteced sex in the past.
Get tested first.
We still use condoms most of the time even though i'm on the pill. I find it alot less messy.
Have you felt pressured to do so by your new partner?
None at all.
- Do you go and get tested before doing so?
Around the time i went on the pill (about 5 months ago, 6 months in to the relationship ) we were both tested and clear.
- Do you even bother asking about your partner's sexual history?
I have asked about it, yes.
- Have you ever had any problems as a result of being slack on the condom front?
No.