How do I ask???

Former Member · February 2006

I've been seeing this guy that I've known from secondary school (I'm 18, he's 19) and I'm confused as to where I stand in the relationship. We see each other a couple of times a week when we're not busy as we're both university students and he's a designer as well so we both have a lot of work in our hands. We sleep in the same bed when I stay over at his but I haven't had sex with him as I believe that would ruin things as it would be too soon. The problem is that back in September 2005 when we met for the first time since we were 16, he said he had a girlfriend and he was hesistant to meet up with me and called off meeting arrangements as 'something had come up'. I kinda gave up on him as he was taken but 5 months on, I haven't heard about the girlfriend and as I've met his family and friends, they don't say anything about her either. His attitude towards me has changed, he wants to see me more and acts more romantic towards me like holds my hands in public and looks at me with adoring expressions and acts like a perfect man. On Friday night he was trying to take a photo of me with his phone but I didn't let him so he cut out a picture of a bunny rabbit from a magazine and said 'if people ask who my girlfriend is I'll show them this then!' - he hints that I'm his girl but I'm still confused! He's never asked me if I wanted to be with him but has just started acting like a boyfriend without notice and he hasn't said if he broke up with the girlfriend. When he was ill with flu, I was by his side, when he was attacked in the street, I was there to look after him... so where's his girlfriend??? Even though I love him to bits I have been holding back the way I feel from him just incase he is still with the girlfriend, even though I doubt he is. I want to ask him if he's still with her and ask him what he feels about me but I want to do it in a way that doesn't scare him off! I want to progress this to a proper relationship. I really really like him and I don't want to miss out on a potential love of my life as I brushed him off when I was 16 and again when I was 17 (cos I had a boyfriend) and I regretted it so much. Any ideas on how I can get answers from him? :crazyeyes

Former Member · February 2006

Just ask him? :thumb:

Ilora x

Former Member · February 2006

rawr wrote:

he cut out a picture of a bunny rabbit from a magazine and said 'if people ask who my girlfriend is I'll show them this then!'

there's your answer! he obviously is calling you his gf so i would be assuming here that guess what! you're his gf!

Former Member · February 2006

agree with the above. he probably said this so that he didn't have to do the cringeworthy "are we girlfriend and boyfriend?" thing. About his ex- you have to ask him outright. I think it's better that he hasn't brought her up, you wouldn't want him going on about her all the time would you? By holding your hand in public and taking to his friends/family- I'd say you don't have to worry about her not being an ex.

Former Member · February 2006

i hate not knowing where i stand. it's not so bad if i don't like them but if i do it annoys me. i just like to know what i can and cannot do etc. but i'm a bit of a softy, even if it's just a casual thing and i like them i wouldn't pull anyone else or anything. when i got with my last bf we'd been meeting up etc for a bit and i was wary about asking where i stood as in the past it's put people off but then he started referring to me as his girlfriend so that kinda told me! just ask him if you want to know. if it scares him off then maybe he doesn't want a relationship.

How do I ask???

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