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My friends hate my new friend...
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
The last few months have been tricky. Basically, the one friend I had in this area whom I could meet up with has now moved away to the capital. So, I'm feeling kinda lonely. Understandable, maybe. But now I'm back in touch with an old work colleague. As I can't reveal her name here, let's call her "K" for the purpose of this thread. Now, me and K get on well. We've spent some time together in the last few months. She attends the local university during the week, and we see each other occasionally on weekends and holidays. She keeps me company, we get drunk together, the usual shenanigans...
Unfortunately, there's just one problem. Everyone I speak to from the site hates her guts. For reasons I can't go into here, they think she treats me badly and that I could do better. They've told me I shouldn't go anywhere near this girl. But I don't see what else I can do. I know this girl's not good for me, but if I stop speaking to her, I'm gonna be all on my own. And that's the last thing I want right now.
How do you cope when you've met someone, but no one else can stand them?
Unfortunately, there's just one problem. Everyone I speak to from the site hates her guts. For reasons I can't go into here, they think she treats me badly and that I could do better. They've told me I shouldn't go anywhere near this girl. But I don't see what else I can do. I know this girl's not good for me, but if I stop speaking to her, I'm gonna be all on my own. And that's the last thing I want right now.
How do you cope when you've met someone, but no one else can stand them?
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
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Comments
I get you now.
Well, at the end of the day, you have to choose to do what you want to do. If you know she's bad news for you, then keep her at arms length and start trying to make new friends - clubs and stuff will help you there. What about work, do you have workmates? Or uni/college?
I can see where you're coming from... why do you/others think she's bad for you? Do you really think that, or are you just saying it because that's what everyone tells you?
I think you should do what you want to do. If that means being friendly with her, then go for it! If not, then try and cut ties with her slowly - that way you'll be working/at uni and it won't matter because you'll have new friends and you'll drift apart gradually.
It is hard sometimes as friends always think they know best about a situation and even if they are proven correct it is up to you to find out for yourself.
Maybe they mean 'get involved' rather than 'associate'. Do you know what I mean? There's a difference. They're obviously worried for you, as mates are meant to be. But like everyones said, it's a choice only you can make.
it doesn't matter what other people think - she is YOUR friend: YOU decide what is right for YOU - nobody else can do that for you!
wtf?!? i made a comment based on what YOU said. if you chose to not reveal all of the story then that's your business. i didn't ask you to tell me more, did i. and if you didn't want to reveal all, you didn't have to.
Do what you want. If people don't like it, fuck 'em!
Keep separate social circles. Some of my friends have barely met each other, and it's best kept that way.
Ultimately, she's a kind girl who's just got some serious troubles to deal with. But my instincts are telling me to help her out. I can’t help it, that's the sort of man I am. If that makes me a bad person, then that's a very sad day. Doing this thread has, if anything, made me all the more defiant to keep speaking to her. Thanks to everyone who responded.