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Am I Gay?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Happy xmas all.
Im a 22 year old lad. I need help. Im going out with a girl and have been for a bit. Ive had 2 other girlfriends this year apart from this one but over the last 2 years ive developed strong feelings for guys. So much so that when im having sex im fantasisng over certain men. Wen i look at porn i look at lesbian and think of guys and also look at gay porn and movies etc. I can seem to get round this and its been getting stronger for over 2 years, what do i do?
Im a 22 year old lad. I need help. Im going out with a girl and have been for a bit. Ive had 2 other girlfriends this year apart from this one but over the last 2 years ive developed strong feelings for guys. So much so that when im having sex im fantasisng over certain men. Wen i look at porn i look at lesbian and think of guys and also look at gay porn and movies etc. I can seem to get round this and its been getting stronger for over 2 years, what do i do?
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Comments
can you see yourself in a LT relationship with another guy?
I could do yes, though obv you don't know how somethings going 2 turn out until it does.
If you are attracted to both sexes then you are bi-sexual.
I would say having physical attraction to some women means you're not exclusively; if indeed you are at all.
If the relationship isn't working for whatever reason then you need to talk to her and let her know! Honesty is the best policy.
LOL, that statistic has changed, that was based in early 90's! The percent has increased due to ppl coming out and society embracing it more. Make sure ya get ur facts correct next time hun!!! :rolleyes:
Its actually between 2 and 4 percent. The 10 percent is an urban legend derived from a flawed study in 1948. In 1989 a study thought it was about 1%.
I think there are a lot more "bisexual" people than people admit to.
Isn't Kinsey's work rather dubious? As far as i know, the people he used for his studies were FAR from representative of the general population.
Can't somehow believe that 80% of the population are bi-sexual...if that was so as someone suggested, homosexual activity would be FAR greater...i don't see people resisting their sexual desires to such an extent, tbh.
Lets get to the crux of this. Statistics, labels or whether being gay is fashionable is not really that relevent here.
Britguy05, you're telling us that you're not really feeling satisfied in your relationships with girls and that you're having increasingly stronger feelings towards having sex with men. First things first, this doesn't mean that you're gay, it just means that you have desires towards men at this moment.
I'd agree with whats been said previously in that its not important right this moment to decide what labels you are or might be and more about focussing in on what you would like to do. I am concerned that you're in a relationship that isn't making you happy. Regardless of your sexuality, do you feel you can remain in this relationship whilst you are confused?
Clearly you have a sexual attraction to men and do you think you could explore that? Do you want to try? What do you need in order to explore this safely and without negative impact? Do you know anyone that you can trust to talk to on this matter? What happens if things get tough? You make mistakes? What happens if its not for you? How will you feel about managing that? Do you have an open enough mind to explore your own sexuality? How would you go about meeting people? Think about the risks that may exist in this course of action and then what you can do to reduce each and every one of those risks.
If you want to chat more about this, I'm happy to talk.
JB
I'm not for the labels but from the sound of it your gay tendencies are strong (not necessarily exclusive, but they're there), and very importantly, have been there for a long period of time (2 years). So I also think you should look into this, being honest with yourself and taking it seriously. Personally, I think this a bit hard to do while having a GF, but that's your choice. Whatever you decide to do, it won't be easy, but after all, this is for discovering what makes you happy.
fashionable!