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This is doing my head in
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm depressed and a self-harmer, I'm trying to get better but nothing works. I was put on Seroxat (in 2002) which did nothing. Then it was Prozac which did nothing good so they up'ed the dose which just made me a bit hyper from time to time so then I was put on Amitriptyline which did nothing so they put the dose up, it still did nothing so then I was put on Citalopram which did nothing so they put the dose up but it did nothing so then they switched me to Venalfaxine which did nothing so then they up'ed the dose but it did nothing and now I'm on another crappy drug called Mirtazapine which is doing nothing except making me too sleepy to function. It really is doing my head in. Why does nothing work? I'm getting worse not better. Will I ever get better?
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sorry I have no advice cos ive never been there, but just wanted to say hang in there and im sure someone will be along to give you info/support.
sorry if that sounds stupid, but maybe its not a chemical depression, maybe its to do with something that needs to be resolved in your head, rather than by altering the chemical balance?
I tried suggesting that I don't need meds to the doctors but they don't listen to me.
its your body, you dont have to accept any treatment or meds they offer you and they still have to treat you. They might be offering you pills to fobb you off.
Why don't you think therapy is working?
It is hard work, there are no miracle cures. Are you sure you're getting worse, or are you just concentrating on the bad and not the good?
Try easing off the ADs, I don't think they work for everyone. See if it helps.
Therapy was great for me, but I could only really get owt out of it once I was off the Prozac. ADs are great for stabilising mood, but they don't make you happy.
If you have no one close to confide in, you could try to write down your feelings and reflect yourself on how you feel from day to day and find things that give you motivation and inspiration.
Good luck.
The therapist told me on Monday that she thinks I'm getting worse not better and that she would speak to the doctor about me which she did and then I went to the doctors (like the therapist told me to) but I just got told by them that I am getting worse, keep taking the tablets.
I don't feel that my mood has been stabalised by the ADs, they just give me side effects. But the pychiatrist told me that despite seeing no improvement when I started taking the ADs that I would get a lot worse if I stopped.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
ADs work by making you feel numb. But if you start off feeling numb anyway, then they don't do a right lot, IMHO.
I would say tell your therapist this, but they don't always listen.
Therapy is very very hard work, and you do have re-lapses. I had a nervous breakdown during my therapy, and practically failed my degree, but I worked through it and got better again. Do keep at it, at all costs, because therapy places are like gold dust on the NHS.
I suffer from depression and self -harm. On 2nd medication, id be lying if i said it does nothing, it numbs me enough to keep me functioning. Been in therapy for over a year. Dont know why im like this.
When i have more severe episodes, its tough shit, nobody can do anything. My gp doesnt increase my dosage. I think she wants me to be just about ok, rather than over medicated, which i can appreciate as pills wont solve anything.
My therapist is ok but i dont really connect with her so i find it incredibly hard to open up.
Anyway we'd had a couple of sessions where hardly aything was said and it was wasting hers and my time so i decided to give it one last chance. Started keeping a diary, just writing my thoughts and feelings down each day and gave it to her to read.
Done it twice now and i think were making a little progress.
Can inderstand how frustrating it is and how hopeless you must feel.
So AD's are shit, make the absolute most of the therapy, take every chance you've got beofre you give up completely.