Do 'Breaks' Work?

Former Member · October 2005

We're apparently on a break for 3 weeks so that we can learn to appreciate each other again and decide if it's definatley each other who we want to be with.

Been together for 2 and a half years, she's just gone off to uni (locally) so personally I can see her coming back and saying lets leave it.

Whatrs your experience?

Former Member · October 2005

Had one, but within days realised she was too precious to lose, and worked my guts off to get her back. Luckily, all was well and we're still together today

. But on the whole, a break is the first step to a break-up in my eyes. But it does let you see where you stand, so it could help. Good luck.

Former Member · October 2005

my boyfriend broke up with me about 5 weeks ago..he thought it was for the best, wanted to be on his own and 'cause of how busy he is. a few weeks down the line after we've seen eachother a few times he's realised he made a big mistake and we're kinda working on things now. sometimes a break can do you the world of good, especially after a few years.

Former Member · October 2005

I think when people say there going on a break, there saying, lets split up..... but in a more 'nicer' way.

But it might bring you two closer, she might be missing you like mad, and viser versa.

Former Member · October 2005

i think breaks can be a good thing... it doesnt have to mean you're never going to get back together. it'll give you both time to think about how things have been going, how you feel etc and could actually help in the long run.

Former Member · October 2005

I went on a break and just never went back because in some cases it makes you see what you missing out on, esp wen you younger x

Former Member · October 2005

A couple of years ago, I was going out with someone for nearly a year when he suggested going on a break for a few weeks to see if it was worth continuing.

The break didnt really work seeing as in those few weeks he managed to get someone pregnant :chin:

Former Member · October 2005

Well at least u realise it wasnt worth it then if he cu just o off and do that! Tats th problem with breaks, ul always be wonderin if they went wiv someone else etc

Former Member · October 2005

Yeah, my mate and her fella went on a a break, they got back together, she found out that he went with someone and she went mad.

Former Member · October 2005

Yea and thats just making it worse than it was before so are they worth it?? Maybe stayin together but seeing each other less and seeing mates more would work better!

Former Member · October 2005

Agreed Have it or Lump it!

Former Member · October 2005

My experience of breaks has never been a good one.
With the last blokey i think we spent more time on breaks than in the actual relationship.Ok so thats probably an exaggeratio but nothing changed or was better because of the breaks.Other than the sex got alot better everytime we came off a break.He was full of false promises and other jangled shit and on more than one occassion i slept with other people.No not something im proud of to be honest but i should have gotten out of the relationship there and then rather than hang on and conrinually go on breaks to sort things out.Cos we never did sort things out.
But i think with the right couple breaks can be the right and appropriate thing to do.Mhm what a contradiction.

Former Member · October 2005

You've all pretty much echoed the plusses and negatives that I was running through my head. Oh well, we'll see, I'll let you know on the 6th November!! How silly!

Former Member · October 2005

Good luck anyways!! Whats ment to be, will be!!

Former Member · October 2005

My boyfriend broke up with me before I went abroad for 2 months. Apparently I was "doing his head in" and this that and the other, anyway...later on he "downgraded" it to a break.

So 2 months later and feeling liberated, we see each other. Still madly in love, got back together on Thursday and he left a few hours ago after talking about moving in together.

Sometimes you see things from a great new perspective but there's not necessarily a right or wrong choice. And in my opinion, you can always get back together and break up, but more often than not the getting back together option never comes around twice. Go for it, if it's wrong you can break up!

Former Member · October 2005

Kat_B wrote:

i think breaks can be a good thing... it doesnt have to mean you're never going to get back together. it'll give you both time to think about how things have been going, how you feel etc and could actually help in the long run.

I agree...because I had one. I had a break a few months ago and it was good for the both of us. We are on much better terms now, we both want the same thing out of the relationship and generally both on the same wavelength now whereas before we wern't.

Former Member · October 2005

Thanks guys! You've made me feel a bit more positive about the whole thing!

Former Member · October 2005

my girlfriend used to go away for months at a time and after 3 weeks you really begin to miss them. Our longest time of seperation was 3 months, I was only able to speak to her once a month at this time because she was on a boat in the ocean somewhere and I worried and worried until I fell into a pit of deperession and craved her return every day. after 2 month I counted the days and then the hours, my family and friends got sick of me and the day she got back I was overjoyed to crying and within an hour made our lips sore from kissing. Breaks can be beautiful so long as they dont last too long :S

Former Member · October 2005

personally i dont believe in them... i think it is someone's way of saying lets break up but not having the guts to do it!!!

Former Member · October 2005

Didn't work

Former Member · October 2005

it's not 6th november yet..

Former Member · October 2005

It wont work if he is just starting Uni. He will find someone else. Uni is a life altering experience in more ways than one. Unfortuatley it is not always altering in a good way for all parties involved

Former Member · October 2005

carnage200 wrote:

It wont work if he is just starting Uni. He will find someone else. Uni is a life altering experience in more ways than one. Unfortuatley it is not always altering in a good way for all parties involved

yeh and what a load of bollocks that is.

firstly if you read properly, it's his girlfriend that's gone to uni.

and yes people can have relationships while at uni. you're obviously not mature enough to be able to think it's possible and think it's all about shagging about.

littlemissy · October 2005

carnage200 wrote:

It wont work if he is just starting Uni. He will find someone else.

And your proof is where?

I have a friend who has just finished uni. She met her boyfriend before starting and they are still together. They went to uni in opposite ends of the country. And it worked.

So yes, although some relationships may not work, others will.

Former Member · November 2005

Generally they can work. In my experience of a "break"/break up it seemed to work. Except out break was really long.. and we didnt contact each other for a long time. 6 months down the line, were 'seeing' each other again.

Having a break tends to make your mind up on how you really feel about that person. Hopefully it makes you realise how much you like the person, and how much you appreciate them. Sometimes though it makes you realise you were not meant to be together afterall.

I hope things work out for you.

Former Member · November 2005

Thanks Captain

Former Member · November 2005

I guess a break could work. I could see one of two things happening. They realize what they are missing and come back and the relationship was stronger than before. Or they realize they aren't missing much and don't come back at all. Either way I suppose you will find out what your relationship is made out of

Former Member · November 2005

~*Girl_Interrupted*~ wrote:

What a pile of bull shit! I think you need alot of growing up to do if you are not mature enough to believe that some long distance relationships may work.
QUOTE]

Erm excuse me but did i slag anyone of? no! You come on here to get opionons, different ones, if they were all the same what help would that be? Now u obvorsly have one extreme point of view that it is more than likely to work (a long distance involving uni). It just so happens that mine view is the other end. I have been to uni and in a long term relationship that was strong while i was there. Things happened after that made my view on this subject at the opposite end to urs, so before you start shooting ur mouth off about matureity take a look at ur own reactions to coments

Do 'Breaks' Work?

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