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Odd Situation..
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I recently started to date someone, and i know we're not an item yet.. but i also know she's sleeping with someone tonight who she likes to call her "special friend".. she's made it clear that she wouldnt cheat, but should i be worried about starting a relationship with her? does it seem weird to anyone else that we're dating and she's getting sex elsewhere?
On that note.. I'm feeling a little insecure based on what she said earlier and i'm open to any advice or suggestions other people have on how to deal with this.
thanks for the advice in advance!
On that note.. I'm feeling a little insecure based on what she said earlier and i'm open to any advice or suggestions other people have on how to deal with this.
thanks for the advice in advance!
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Comments
Well, while you're not exclusive, it's not that she's being unfaithful in any way, but I think it's really... rude.
We're meant to be going for coffee tomorrow and i know she's gonna have the biggest grin on her face. :mad:
if i was in your position and i had feelings for the girl i wouldn't put up with it, but it depends what type of person you are, if you can handle it or not. you could always speak to her and ask her to stop?
Seriously, is she made of gold/diamonds or something? What's so great about this girl that you're willing to humiliate yourself to go on a date with her the day after she gets a jolly rogering and is cheeky enough to boast about it?
Obviously, if people aren't exclusive yet, they may date or have sex with others before then, but not to the point where they openly brag about it, unless they're writing literature to see how far the poor sap can be pushed. Have some respect for yourself, you sound like you deserve a lot better.
pretty much sums it up.
If/when you start going out properly then make it clear you wont accept this sort of thing otherwise who gives a fuck? A shag is a shag nothing more!
People on this board put far to much importance on sex ... there's a huge fucking difference between a shag and 'making love!'
That may or may not be true (though I would say that most posters do know the difference).
There is a difference.
But do you not think its odd that its like this? If you're dating someone then yeah, fine, go and have sex with someone else, if its not exclusive. I did it.
But to then brag about it? It's very inconsiderate and very rude. This lad has to ask himself whether he wants someone who has such little regard for his pride.
IF she was then fair enough that's pretty out of order but i assumed from what he said that she was just letting him know. If that's the case then she was just being honest which I think is pretty decent. If he doesn't like it then fair enough but I think its better to be honest than be doing it behind his back!
Sounds like she's very insecure and wants you to be jealous to make her feel more wanted... if that makes sense... why else would she tell you???
I'd dump her if I were you... if she can't give you any respect, you'd better do it for yourself.
Most importantly, don't go by what people here are telling you, and what "everyone" says is right; go by what you want/need from a relationship. A bit of envy is OK, but if it's jealousy then it probably isn't for you.
As a tip, don't try pushing her into sex with you before she's ready, not only is "you'll do it with your customers, why not me" harsh, with them it's sex. between you, you want it to be making love. (later in the relationship, "just sex" can be fun)
Just remember, if it is a regularly non-exclusive relationship, always wear a condom.
Knowing what you know about her special friend relationship also tells you quite a bit about her character and where her head is. You have to make a decision if you can live with it.