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Feeling a Wee Depressed/Other things
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Dont know if this is the right place but hey - Where to Start….
I am feeling really depressed over these few days and especially today. I don’t know what to do.
About 2+ months ago my dad said that he would take me on holiday on the 25th while my mum and my sister would go on holiday to Majorca. I haven’t even had a phone call from him. My mum and my sister are flying out in a few days. This has made me upset. We don’t see much of each other and several phone calls a year. He always says he will meet up and go on holiday but this never happens. But I love him very much. As I haven’t had any phone call from my father my mum is getting worried and doesn’t want to leave me alone for 12 days. She has offered to take me but I don’t know what to say or do. I want to go, as I haven’t had a holiday this year and would want to keep my mum and my sister company. But I think I will get bored and I don’t have any money so ill just be following my mum and my sister. Another factor of me not wanting to go is my body, at the moment I don’t have any cloths (all jeans, and you cant wear that on the beach) and of my obese body. I am 17 and must be 17 stone and just say, big tits and a big belly. I don’t want to go swimming or go on the beach because of this.
I don’t have many friends in my life, probably 1 or 2 I can call my close friends, I have friends at work but its just at work. I have many people I know on the Internet but they can’t go to the cinema etc. so i am allways indoors and on the PC from start to finish.
Tomorrow ill be getting my results from 6th Form, I know I did crap and I didn’t revise and I spent most of my lessons not learning anything. Adding my GCSE grades (D, E, E, E, E, D, E, E, F, C, E) which you can see isn’t good and can get me a good job now or in later on in life. My mum is pushing me to get a full time job in Sainsbury’s but I don’t want too. I can’t stand working 40+ hours on the same aisle all my life. I want to go for another job but again I don’t have the grades or I am not older enough (working behind a bar/pub)
As you may know I love or in your case ‘like’ a girl – I still haven’t asked her and now that’s been a year or so after I made the post – I don’t ask her as again of my body. I want to be with her but agiain does she.
I am feeling really depressed over these few days and especially today. I don’t know what to do.
About 2+ months ago my dad said that he would take me on holiday on the 25th while my mum and my sister would go on holiday to Majorca. I haven’t even had a phone call from him. My mum and my sister are flying out in a few days. This has made me upset. We don’t see much of each other and several phone calls a year. He always says he will meet up and go on holiday but this never happens. But I love him very much. As I haven’t had any phone call from my father my mum is getting worried and doesn’t want to leave me alone for 12 days. She has offered to take me but I don’t know what to say or do. I want to go, as I haven’t had a holiday this year and would want to keep my mum and my sister company. But I think I will get bored and I don’t have any money so ill just be following my mum and my sister. Another factor of me not wanting to go is my body, at the moment I don’t have any cloths (all jeans, and you cant wear that on the beach) and of my obese body. I am 17 and must be 17 stone and just say, big tits and a big belly. I don’t want to go swimming or go on the beach because of this.
I don’t have many friends in my life, probably 1 or 2 I can call my close friends, I have friends at work but its just at work. I have many people I know on the Internet but they can’t go to the cinema etc. so i am allways indoors and on the PC from start to finish.
Tomorrow ill be getting my results from 6th Form, I know I did crap and I didn’t revise and I spent most of my lessons not learning anything. Adding my GCSE grades (D, E, E, E, E, D, E, E, F, C, E) which you can see isn’t good and can get me a good job now or in later on in life. My mum is pushing me to get a full time job in Sainsbury’s but I don’t want too. I can’t stand working 40+ hours on the same aisle all my life. I want to go for another job but again I don’t have the grades or I am not older enough (working behind a bar/pub)
As you may know I love or in your case ‘like’ a girl – I still haven’t asked her and now that’s been a year or so after I made the post – I don’t ask her as again of my body. I want to be with her but agiain does she.
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Comments
As for your body, I'll say this. Its more of an issue for you than it is for anybody else. Really. I'm a similar size, and my wife loves my sexy body (ahem). My housemate likes big men. Lots of women do.
If you don't see yourself as a valuable human being who can be sexually attractive then nobody will find you sexually attractive. It'd be the same if you weighed 11 stone, honestly- if you think yourself ugly then nobody will notice you, because you will hide from everyone.
As for your examination results, several things. If you are not getting the grades you want, then perhaps either the courses you are doing or the studying environment you are in is not right. Have you contemplated vocational courses at the local college? What do you want to do? What would you see as a good job?
Working full-time is good for you, and I think you should do it. It gets you out of the house and it forces you to be sociable. It forces you to interact with other people, and that is what you need. Social interaction is frightening if you are not used to it, but working with colleagues and customers gives you confidence in social settings.
You won't meet friends by sitting at home and moping about how nobody loves you.
If he lets you down often maybe you have to lay down the law. Either he wants to treat you like a son or he doesn't. Be forceful.
As for your looks: don't worry, anything that worries you liek that will make you ill. Just try to eat sensibly (easier said i know) and even if it's just jogging try and get out more.
As for the holiday - Fuck it. Ask your mum for some money and buy shorts and tshirts and join your mum and sister. No one will give a fuck if you're fat or not on holiday. Just enjoy yourself.