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Peer Pressure
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
Hi, I'm basically in a situation (and have been in it on and off for several months now) where friends of mine keep basically asking to sleep with them (it's all they ever seem to think about. And for personally, I think a relationshsip should be based on more than having sex) and they seem to pressurise me into doing so, even though they're aware that I have no feelings for them at all.
What is the best thing to do? And are most people like this when they're around 15/16 or not?
What is the best thing to do? And are most people like this when they're around 15/16 or not?
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
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i think its prolly not a common occurrence....but it does happen cos sum of my mates were like dat with me...nd i gotta admit i did give in as well....sum tyms it was good...sum tyms it was bad....but wen u get to a point when u really do not wanna b in dat situation....u really do hav to b firm nd just say no...its hard at first cos ur so used to giving in to wat they wnat from u....nd sumtyms u do hav to make a choice whether u still want them to b ur friends nd continue sexing them...or maybe lose a few friends
if you don't want sex. tell them "no." and don't let peer pressure force you into doing things you don't want to do. your mates sound like complete twats btw.
I know they do! And I must be the only one out of my friends who doesn't find this funny - that is, a friend of mine asking me for a 'shag'...
This person has now asked me to marry him (He knows that he'll need my parents' permission first, though) - aware that I DON'T fancy him, will never go out with him and fancy a friend of his. (He seem to bring up the subject of me fancying his friend quite alot - mainly the age gap :rolleyes: , even though it's really NOTHING to do with him)
Anyway, I asked a friend of his to have a word with him and apparantely, his friend told him that I told his friend that I would go out with him, when I won't...
So, I finally decided that I want to talk to someone and decided to talk to one of the teachers in school - who seems to think that he doesn't mean it. However, she'll have a word with him if it becomes worse.
Tell the person that you dont think of them in that way and you only want to be friends. He seems like a bit of a weirdo asking to marry you before you have even started going out.
Sex with a friend will never really be worth it unless both partys are sure thats what they want, your gonna miss out on the cuddling in and general loving feeling afterwards which if you ask me is just as good as the sex. Wait until you meet someone who you feel strongly enough about and comfy enough with to have sex, dont give it away to some freak like this...
Your mates want sex? What idiots, what do they think you are a hooker? Tell them to fuck off.
Seems that way
I posted this on another site and according to someone there (after they read my first post over and over again) they seem to think that this person who keeps asking me for sex just does it to embarrass me in fornt of everyone - he was the same ages ago when he kept asking me out and I told him no...
Let me guess teenagers? Theyre probably right, he's probably doing it to wind you up or to make himself look big in front of his mates. Seriously though if he were a real friend he wouldn't do it.
Yeah
But he's done similar things many times before, like:
'If you tell me who you fancy, I promise I won't tell anyone'. And then he goes and tells a friend of his...
And he also keeps getting me to ask my parents to get me something which costs alot of money as well. And he keeps going on about it as well, even thouh I've told im that I've been told no.
Satehen - I think I agree with you. And I think if he did mean it, he'd just say it once, listen to whatever I've got to say and leave at that.
If one or some of your other mates has said no to him then stick with them and go do something of your own with each other. If the guy still keeps on about having sex with you then kick him as hard as you can in the nuts and ask him if he now understands the word NO now!?
As far as I know, I'm the only one he does it to.
I do keep telling him no and do try to stay away from him, but where it's someone in school who I have in some of my lessons and we have the same circle of friends, it seems to be a little bit difficult.
I've already told one of the teachers in school, but she thinks he's messing around, therefore she won't do anything about it... :rolleyes:
I mentioned this to my dad when I came home from school today, but he didn't say much. (Not sure if he knows what to say, tbh)
There's another teacher who knows as well and won't do anything either. BUT I know for a fact that if I tell the teachers anything, they won't do anything about it. And I learnt that the hard way a few years ago when I was being bullied, because I'm basically different to everyone else.
Someone on here did advise going to see a counseller or someone like that, but can they actually do anything about this or not?
The thing that makes this even worse is that he knows where I live - his friend gave him my address, which he shouldn't have done.
The best thing to do is to keep your morals as they are, and not compromise on them.
A relationship should be about more than just sex.
I started my relationship with my bf when he was 15, and when I was 16 (roughly 3 years ago). We were just interested in having time together, spending time together. Most of the time we'd go out for walks, watch movies, go to concerts, ect.
If you want a sure way to regret your actions, it's doing things when peer pressure is involved. Go with your instincts.
Tell you dad again, tell him it's upsetting you. And tell your teacher that you want something done as well. Don't take no for an anwser. Tell your teacher that if they don't do something then your not coming to school until it's been sorted.
no they cannot really act on what you say or physically do anything about it becasue of confidentiality.
you did well talking to your teacher about it. even if she won't listen properly or do anything about it.
talk to someone else. even go and see the head. tell them you are being "sexually harassed" and "bullied" - they WILL do something about it.
its hardly "messing aroiund" or a joke when you're on the recieving end.
There's no point me saying that I'm going to leave until everything's sorted out - as of next week, I'm only coming in for exams...
CrazyKitten - I agree with you and I told him this yesterday and he seems to think that it was something a friend of mine said (which was true) and seems to think that I basically go by whatever he says and can't think for myself, which is a load of crap.
If he thinks of you like that, then tell him you dont want to be friends with him anymore. You dont feel comfy talking to him and he is just a pathetic little boy.
Have you tried talking with the other girls in the group about it? Ask them what you think you should do about him, even if you do stop talking to him im sure they will be there for you to talk to
The other girls do know about it and they just laugh about it and this seems to encourage him to continue doing it... :rolleyes:
I did tell someone to have a word with the person who does this to me - his answer was 'just ignore it'. (His answer to everything :rolleyes: )
Thanks. Thankfully, I've never been 'alone' with him.
The last bit you said, I totally agree with. I do want to wait, it's not something I'm ready for yet.
Also tell them if they had any respect for you, and were any kind of friend they would have stopped asking you the first time you said no, and if u do change ur mind u can let them kno lol