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My Brother
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ha i can't actually belive i am writing this but it's just got so out of hand.
Umm well, my brother doesn't live with me anymore he lives with my mum but because it has been half term and mum was on holiday he has been staying here for the whole of last week, and because he isn't exactly the friendliest of people towards me i'v e been keeping out of his way letting him play on his playstation internet thing all week. He's 14 and half by the way.
Anyway about an hour ago he just came in from school plugged his playstation in and turned it on i was like no don't do that i'm watching something he had a big strop started shouting at me and whatver i was like well im turning your playstation off im watching my programme play it later/tommorow. Then he started shouting at me scremaing i was a bitch, sick sadistic moron he hopes i die, wishes he could kill me or whatever, i'm like fine just ignoring him cause he's acting like a right tit.
He then gets annoyed i'm not responding so says hes going to delete all the contacts out of my phone starts turning the Tv on and off (i am aware of how sad this sounds don't worry i feel like a commplete nob myslef) So by this point i lost my composure and shouted at him and sat him down in a chair so he then just started kicking and hitting me and he actually pushed me to the floor and lay there kicking me, i was like wtf, but it actually fucking hurt a lot, i'm lying there crying and he's going for me. He then went upstairs and trashed my bedroom threw all the stuff off my desk/dressing table pulled things out of my cupboards, i went upstairs to see what the banging was and he came at me with a metla pole screaming and shouting abuse at me.
So i'm like ignoring him telling him to grow up act his age and then he said he was going to kill me it was going to make his day and went into a kitchen to get a knife while scremaing and crying saying he looks foward to the day i die and hopes i'm horribly murdered. I know it sounds so god dammed stupid but it wasn't even like a brother sister fight but i just sat their and took it cause theres no way i'm going to hit him back i would get in so much shit.
He then rode off on his bike to his house still crying and screaming, my boyfriend saw him as he drove past n asked him what was up and he said 'that stupid bitch wouldn't let me play playstation' Oh well that explains it then.... :rolleyes:
Thing is whatever way it gets looked at it will by my fault, dad won't beleive me if i told him i would get in trouble for being irresponsible, and i would have antiginised him, and he never belives how violent he can get. Ever since mum moved out (be 2 years this august) each parent pussy foots around him so much he is so spoilt and mollycoddled for his age it is unbeleivable, but then i'm silly and selfish if i suggest this.
I just really don't know what to do i feel so stupid i've just been beaten up by my 14 year old brother, ha, what a twat am i.
It's not fucking on and i can't say a bad word against him to anyone and i really don't know what to do. Hearing your own brother saying he wants to murder you is erm quite a shock i just feel completely stuck. Maybe i am making a big deal out of nothing.
Any advice or anything please
(Oh god that was long i'm sorry)
Umm well, my brother doesn't live with me anymore he lives with my mum but because it has been half term and mum was on holiday he has been staying here for the whole of last week, and because he isn't exactly the friendliest of people towards me i'v e been keeping out of his way letting him play on his playstation internet thing all week. He's 14 and half by the way.
Anyway about an hour ago he just came in from school plugged his playstation in and turned it on i was like no don't do that i'm watching something he had a big strop started shouting at me and whatver i was like well im turning your playstation off im watching my programme play it later/tommorow. Then he started shouting at me scremaing i was a bitch, sick sadistic moron he hopes i die, wishes he could kill me or whatever, i'm like fine just ignoring him cause he's acting like a right tit.
He then gets annoyed i'm not responding so says hes going to delete all the contacts out of my phone starts turning the Tv on and off (i am aware of how sad this sounds don't worry i feel like a commplete nob myslef) So by this point i lost my composure and shouted at him and sat him down in a chair so he then just started kicking and hitting me and he actually pushed me to the floor and lay there kicking me, i was like wtf, but it actually fucking hurt a lot, i'm lying there crying and he's going for me. He then went upstairs and trashed my bedroom threw all the stuff off my desk/dressing table pulled things out of my cupboards, i went upstairs to see what the banging was and he came at me with a metla pole screaming and shouting abuse at me.
So i'm like ignoring him telling him to grow up act his age and then he said he was going to kill me it was going to make his day and went into a kitchen to get a knife while scremaing and crying saying he looks foward to the day i die and hopes i'm horribly murdered. I know it sounds so god dammed stupid but it wasn't even like a brother sister fight but i just sat their and took it cause theres no way i'm going to hit him back i would get in so much shit.
He then rode off on his bike to his house still crying and screaming, my boyfriend saw him as he drove past n asked him what was up and he said 'that stupid bitch wouldn't let me play playstation' Oh well that explains it then.... :rolleyes:
Thing is whatever way it gets looked at it will by my fault, dad won't beleive me if i told him i would get in trouble for being irresponsible, and i would have antiginised him, and he never belives how violent he can get. Ever since mum moved out (be 2 years this august) each parent pussy foots around him so much he is so spoilt and mollycoddled for his age it is unbeleivable, but then i'm silly and selfish if i suggest this.
I just really don't know what to do i feel so stupid i've just been beaten up by my 14 year old brother, ha, what a twat am i.
It's not fucking on and i can't say a bad word against him to anyone and i really don't know what to do. Hearing your own brother saying he wants to murder you is erm quite a shock i just feel completely stuck. Maybe i am making a big deal out of nothing.
Any advice or anything please
(Oh god that was long i'm sorry)
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Comments
Hope it works out for you
xxx
Chris's Bitch: Thanks, my parents, well my dad thinks the sun shines out of his backside cause he is 'well behaved' and normal when he's around them, the thing is he treats no one else like this he doesn't shout abuse at my parents just me when he is alone, i really do not know what goes off in his head
Sigh.
Thankfully he isn't violent anymore. Still has a nasty temper but would never touch me again.
When I was younger it use to piss me off as well, as everyone thought he was the perfect gentleman as he can be a charmer with the rest of my family and friends, thinking he's gods' gift.
Sorry hun, that wasn't much advice.
But your brother obviously needs help. But will only happen if he is willing to admit his faults. You need to tell your mum and dad.
she also seems to have a mental problem but if i say that to my parents they say im the psycho bitch....they too think the sun shines out of her arse. at one point i pretty much lost my whole family cos of her and even dad (who always sides with me).
but its getting better now...i just stand back and let her hit me....cos last time i went to A+E with a split head cos of her, they said that they would do her for GBH next time i come in with an injury.
in your case i think you need to record whats happening, if you have a voice recorder on your phone use that, then play it to your parents. if you need to talk hun then you can always chat to me on msn, i understand where your coming from.
1. Hit him (Ass, legs, upper arms etc).
2. Tied him up. (Seriously)
3. Moved into another room and watched TV through there.
I have a brother of that age, and i remember being it myself - it's normally a phase, but your brother is crazy.
that explains everything, he's only a teenage boy, what hre's done is totally unexceptable but some people find it harder than others adapting to puberty, like hormones and all that, when i was his age i had done far worse than that and on a daily basis too.
he also played the innocent, meek one with everyone else, so everyone either thought i was mental, or that i was making it up. cause people often punched themselves in the face just for the hell of it :rolleyes:
so yeah, i don't know how to fix it (lucky for me, my brother now works abroad 90% of the time, joy!) but if it's worth anything, i know how you feel. and it's not silly at all.
The more you retaliate the more aggressive he will become and the more you ingnore him the more pissed off he will get, so it's a no win situation unless you can find level ground. What you need to do is have an adult one to one with someone from your family. You gotta at least try and talk to your mum or dad about it because he will end up getting worse. You could even try phoning up a helpline and get advice.
Also, one of the reasons why he picked on you is because he could see you as being a little "soft" and he knows he can get away with taking out his frustration on you. Might also be a good idea to make him aware of ho much he hurt you as well after he has calmed down.
His age is no excuse by the way. Even if that's the ay he feels he should never react like that. He obviously has no self control and is far too used to getting his own way. I'd expect that from my sister (half sister) who is 6 years old, and even then, she stopped that when she was 4
Notice a pattern here. Didn't realise how many people have suffered with pyscho brothers/sisters. Mine is 5 years older than me, So I can get away with calling him a pyscho.
Jazza, sorry if i didn't make it clear i live with my dad, my brothers dad also so i can't really kick him out lol, although my dad is not here quite a bit cause he works shifts and whatever, i don't think he would ever actually 'abuse' me infront of him. Although he's pulled a knife out on me infront of my mum so you never do know.
I'm making him sound like a hooligan when most of the time he is just a normal kid, especially with everyone else in the family his friends etc.
A question though how did everyone else go about telling their parents with out sounding like a silly tell-tale? Cause i just want to be listened to/taken seriously for a change.
Just tell the truth. Tell your dad what you did and what he did. How you didn't know what to do. Even admit that you maybe could have handled yourself better, etc. Showing your dad that you can admit you were a little at fault as well.
like i said, some people find it hard to adapt to changes in their life, maybe he does have personal problems and he's releasing it on you and this is underscored by the fact that he's growing up, i used to hit my sister, punch her violently, after it i would go to the room and cry sometimes, it's a spontaneous reaction, he is a little shit for the things he's doing but it's better to be understanding instead of judgemental.
i say you get your bf to kick seven shades of shit out of your brother and make sure he knows why its happening, get your bf to threaten him with a knife and see how he likes it, if your brother is anything like my girlfriends lil bro then your bf will probably have wanted to hit him sometimes in the past anyway.
my gfs brother's no way near as bad as yours sounds but he is really annoying sometimes and is constantly jumping on us when we're watching tv or will start throwing things around (just like pillows etc..) or he'll just barge in when were having an arguement and believe me the temptation to just launch him in the face has been unbeleivable at times.
i know you will probably say no to this idea as he's still your brother etc.. but you cant just let him get away with beating you up or it will just happen again and again and he'll just push the limits even further each time until one day when it goes too far...
i have 3 younger brother. The two younger ones are bastards when they want to be. i'm 21 and they're 17 and 15 and have both wacked me at various times.
the 17 year old would do it if i wouldn't do something he told me to and at one point kicked me and broke my arm when i asked him to move his feet of the arm of the settee next me.
And i got some really bad bruises yesterday off the 15 year old. in my house we all eat at the same time. so i'm cooking dinner, waiting for me rents and 17 year old bro to come home from rugby so we could eat. 15 year old wanted his now so i told him no cos it would all be ready in about 10 mins and we could eat then. so he started punching and kicking me cos i wouldn't let him get the food out of the oven :eek2:
and i've tried hitting them back. i just get beaten worse so i've decided there's no point. and when i tell me rents they just tell me to hit him back next time or tell either of them not to do it again. not very helpful when they don't listen
Ahh yes that could have been me writting that it's all so true. bah. I've calmed down now, although i don't know what i'm supposed to say to him tomorow when he comes round to do his paper round. I might send my mum an email but that seems quite sad, haha, cause i know he has already gone home crying to her. Cest la vie and all that i guess
my brother still hasn't grown out of it. he's 26. he has a good job, house and family, and although he's generally a bit of a twat, he appears to everyone else as a normal, perfectly adjusted adult. but when it comes to me, he still acts like he's 15. because he was always allowed to get away with it, he always has. and he still does.
you have to let him know now, in no uncertain terms, that it's not on. while he's still young enough to change.
When I think back to it, im glad I have finally moved away. I do get on with sisters better now, but at the time, when it's all happening, you feel it will never stop.
Im quite a quiet, at-home, reserved person. Not into the whole fighting thing at all. Just wondering if there is a trend with sisters/brothers being abused by siblings who are more 'loud'? (probably not the best word but ya know what I mean...)
i had the same problem with my sister but she grew out of it - after the neighbours had called the police during one of our fights.
you arent silly at all, dont worry xx
I seriously would not have put up with that, beans. You should have phoned your parents that instant and told them so they knew it wasnt your fault. Hope it all gets sorted.
i really dont have any advice but *hugs* sounds like you could do with one.
and it isnt your fault.
It is not normal for a 14 year old who doesnt have problems to suddenly snap at u like that, it was obviously not a normal brotherly sisterly fight because u wouldnt get that violent. He abused you and you do seriously need to talk to someone. Instead of going to your parents and making it sound like you are 'dobbing him in' you need to approach the subject in a mature manor. Let you parents know what has happened and say that you are concerned about his behaviour. Especailly if he's never done it before. Tell them he scared you and that your worried he may go further next time.
They will see that u actually have true concern and worry for your brother & may well get help for him. He needs to speak to someone about all these issues he has because he's taking them out on u 4 no reason. If i cant watch tv or play or play ps2 etc i dont go threatening to kill the person who prevents me from doing it.
Hope this has helped
XxX
I'd get aas many mates as you can round, and kick the little shit into next week. If you need any help...