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should i shag him?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
ok this is a kinda weird situation so you're all gonna have to hear me out guys!!!!
well, i met this guy (who i think i've talked about in a previous post) who i became really good mates with. he admitted that he fancied me a couple of weeks ago. now i wasn't sure how i felt about him. he was a nice guy and everything but i just got this funny 6th sense that made me feel i didn't trust him. now i'm falling for him big style and not sure what to do, so i've been doing some research on him and found out hes got a bit of a history with the ladies (hes a slut!!!). so now i'm really worried that i'm just another in a long line of his conquests. what do you guys think??? should i sleep with him or not???
i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hei <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    You've gotta be sure you want to shag him , and if your asking eveyone here you can't be sure so i'd say no don't shag him........but then i really know nothing so see what others say
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What answer would you like?
    • If you feel the need to ask, you are obviously feeling unsure & therefore I would say no, not yet anyway. Wait until you don't need to ask.

      or
    • Well you seem to know what you are letting yourself in for. As long as you use protection (& I'm sure you would) and as long as your not looking for a long term, faithful partner, I'd say go ahead, shag him, & have a good time <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    Let me know which one you want to use whizzy & I'll delete the other one <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/wink.gif"&gt;

    j9

    [This message has been edited by j9 (edited 24-03-2001).]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by j9:
    What answer would you like?
    • If you feel the need to ask, you are obviously feeling unsure & therefore I would say no, not yet anyway. Wait until you don't need to ask.

      or
    • Well you seem to know what you are letting yourself in for. As long as you use protection (& I'm sure you would) and as long as your not looking for a long term, faithful partner, I'd say go ahead, shag him, & have a good time <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    Let me know which one you want to use whizzy & I'll delete the other one <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/wink.gif"&gt;

    j9

    [This message has been edited by j9 (edited 24-03-2001).]


    Cynical. Scathing. Very unlike j9. Oh well.

    Um...but yeah, what she said ^^^^^^

    And all the grown-ups say is sorry, cos we got no reply.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    sorry guys, i've just read my original post and it was a bit garbled wasn't it?!
    i think you all got my point anyway.

    hmmmm, i'm still unsure, and j9 you were v nasty, thats so unlike you!!!!
    its pretty bad coz everytime i'm in the same room as him i just wanna rush over and rip his clothes off but i have to restrain myself. i just don't wanna give him any power over me.
    aaahhhh, i think i'm just gonna flip a coin: heads i do, tails i don't!!!!
    i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the coin i flipped came up heads!
    i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    cummon guys give j9 a break, she wasn't being cynical or nasty, pointing out the conflict that wizzy has, and she'd be right, obviously regardless of what we say or suggest you're going to ultimately do what you need / have to. Like j9 said go for it with the knowledge that it probably won't be anything more than a lay, or wait and see what happens, either way be safe.
    I think it's because I'm clumsy
    I try not to talk to loud
    I think it's because I'm crazy
    I try not to act to proud
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Turtle:

    Cynical. Scathing. Very unlike j9. Oh well.

    Um...but yeah, what she said ^^^^^^



    No Turtle, you are entirely wrong, I was going for mischievous, humorous. That's why I put in the grin & the wink.

    Just because that's how u feel, don't read it into my post.

    j9

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by whizzygirl:
    sorry guys, i've just read my original post and it was a bit garbled wasn't it?!
    i think you all got my point anyway.

    hmmmm, i'm still unsure, and j9 you were v nasty, thats so unlike you!!!!
    its pretty bad coz everytime i'm in the same room as him i just wanna rush over and rip his clothes off but i have to restrain myself. i just don't wanna give him any power over me.
    aaahhhh, i think i'm just gonna flip a coin: heads i do, tails i don't!!!!


    I didn't think that you post was garbled at all.

    I thought you knew me whizzy & I am very hurt that you thought I could be nasty to you, let alone v nasty <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif">.

    I assumed from your post that you were in mental turmoil about the situation & that part of your problem was that you might feel like you would be used if you slept him, but that the dichotomy was that you really wanted to.

    Given the situation, personally I would write down a list of pros and cons. There would probably end up being more cons, but then I would let my heart take over & ignore any sensible decision I may have come up with. I must re-iterate, this is what I would do.

    I was just giving two possible responses to the problem & suggesting that whatever anyone says, you must do what you feel most comfortable with and what your heart tells you to do. Trying to point out, in a jokey way (I really did have a smile on my face as I typed) that it probably won't make any difference what people say.

    You will, as is human nature, take the answer that subconciously fits in with what you already know you want to do, but may not have actually realised.

    I could see that both responses were valid, but only one would be valid for you.

    In no way was I trying to be nasty, I don't do that as well you know. I'm sorry that I upset you, but I think that your upset was derived from misinterpretation, fired, maybe, by Turtles response.

    I'm very sad now, maybe I'll have to be more careful in the future.

    Do people misinterpret me often? I hope not <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif"&gt;

    j9
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by j9:

    Just because that's how u feel, don't read it into my post.

    j9


    Sorry j9. Maybe I'm reading into this one as well, but you seem to have a problem with me at the moment? Care to explain, preferably privately?
    And all the grown-ups say is sorry, cos we got no reply.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    no, dont shag him, i know those type of people, wait and see if he makes any move and make sure its a long term thing if he does.

    one idea is to spend the night together and watch a video cuddled up on the sofa, you'll be able to tell if he really cares for you in a mature and responsible way.

    n if u sleep in the same bed that night, try n not give out any sexual signals n see what his response is, maybe if he trieds n e thing say "i just want to cuddle up n sleep in ur arms" n see what he does n if he accepts that, if he does, go for him, he'll be a great sensetive lover, if he neglects u cos of it, he aint worth it.

    good luck
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    j9 i was only kidding with that reply and i thought turtle was too, so sorry for any misunderstandings!!!
    as ever your advice has been insightful and helpful so thank you, its good to know theres someone with some sense in this world of madness! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;
    and your right i am in a bit of a turmoil about this guy at the mo. your help and everyone elses has helped me get some perspective even though i'm not sure what i'm gonna do yet. i think perhaps the best idea would be for me to play it by ear and see what happens. but i'll let you know how i got on.
    once again please don't think i was being nasty about your reply i was smiling when i typed my reponse!!! i hope we're cool mate.
    whizzy xxx
    i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    Originally posted by Turtle:
    Sorry j9. Maybe I'm reading into this one as well, but you seem to have a problem with me at the moment? Care to explain, preferably privately?


    ditto! hehe. no not with u, i meant with me. but shes sort of explained.. ah well.

    (sorry for the madness of this post... alcohol induced wording.)

    It only takes one tree to make a thousand matches, only takes one match to burn a thousand trees
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you have to question his motives then you shouldn't do it.
    There's a girl in my mirror
    I wonder who she is
    Sometimes I think I know her
    Sometimes I really wish I did
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by HARRY!!!:
    no, dont shag him, i know those type of people

    You mean you ARE that sort of person.
    And all the grown-ups say is sorry, cos we got no reply.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    meeeiiiioooowwww!!!!!!
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