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Bestfriend to lover to nothing to friend!!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hello!
Over the last 2 months, I've become good friends with a bloke who was my best friend for about a year. I went out with hi, for less then a month during our year long friendship, and we attempted to maintain it, but after a while we grew apart as he couldn't cope with being a close friend, and me having boyfriends. When we broke up, he got really depressed, saying that he wanted to kill himself and telling me he was completely and utterly in love with me. We were together less then a month and our relationship was rocky and timid with very little excitment. I was his first girlfriend and he hasn't had any since, and it was about 3 years ago. After our relationship ended, we were still best friends. I had a new boyfriend for about 6 months, and when I broke up with that guy, a month or so later I got together with someone new, who I was with for a year and a half. Now my friend and me hadn't been together for nearly a year and he was still telling me he loved me, even after the 6 month relationship had ended and the new one had started. Then he went to Spain for a week on holiday, and when he returned he pretty much cut me out of his life. I was sorta, taken back by that, but at the same time thought it would give him time to just get me out of his head and get away from me because, being friends with me was obviously making it too hard for him to let go of feelings for me.
Recently our friendship has got good again and we discuss loads of things like we used to before. I've been in other relationships (as mentioned above) and am looking to possibly go into a new one with a new lovely bloke. Now I've noticed whenever we have house parties and we're all a little tispy, my friends always trying to cuddle me or trying to hold my hand etc.... We chat online a lot and if I say brb and don't return for a while, he'll text me, asking where I am, what is taking me so long- why did I say brb if I wasn't coming back. All my friends and I went to a fest recently and all crashed in tents and despite the fact I had a tiny tiny 2 man tent and there was 1 person sleeping in the humungous 6 man next door, he complained and complained outside my tent at 3am, and then whilst I opened the door to speak to a different friend, he leapt in my tent, curled up and went to sleep, waking up in the morning with "Thanks for letting me stay last night" even though he invited himself in. Simarly with the msn thing, if he sees me around college or town, he'll hold a grudge about me saying brb and not coming back, despite me explaining why I didn't return.
I've told him about this new guy I like and he's said "Oh I think you'd be good together" I also mentioned my ex who I am very very close to and am great friends with and he just ran him into the ground with insults and foul language.
What is going on with this guy? Do you think he's wanting/hoping for more than just a friendship? He's constantly saying how he hates the way guys treat me (some of my friends can act bang out of order when they're drunk and stoned) and yet the next day, despite seeing me pushing these guys off and telling em where to go, he's at my throat saying that I must enjoy it , as though I deserve what I get-yet at the time somethings happening he makes himself scarce and comes back when I'm feeling shitty and angry about blokes! It's like I'm being watched or I have some duty to him with this msn crap and how he's trying to be defensive about blokes and if someone tries it on, he's at my throat about it. What is this bloke after? Whys he acting like this? I wanna be friends with him because we get on so well, but it's tiring competing with him bitching at me just for not returning to msn and if I make a mistake about a bloke, it's rubbed in my face.
Sorry it's sooo long!!
Malt xx
Over the last 2 months, I've become good friends with a bloke who was my best friend for about a year. I went out with hi, for less then a month during our year long friendship, and we attempted to maintain it, but after a while we grew apart as he couldn't cope with being a close friend, and me having boyfriends. When we broke up, he got really depressed, saying that he wanted to kill himself and telling me he was completely and utterly in love with me. We were together less then a month and our relationship was rocky and timid with very little excitment. I was his first girlfriend and he hasn't had any since, and it was about 3 years ago. After our relationship ended, we were still best friends. I had a new boyfriend for about 6 months, and when I broke up with that guy, a month or so later I got together with someone new, who I was with for a year and a half. Now my friend and me hadn't been together for nearly a year and he was still telling me he loved me, even after the 6 month relationship had ended and the new one had started. Then he went to Spain for a week on holiday, and when he returned he pretty much cut me out of his life. I was sorta, taken back by that, but at the same time thought it would give him time to just get me out of his head and get away from me because, being friends with me was obviously making it too hard for him to let go of feelings for me.
Recently our friendship has got good again and we discuss loads of things like we used to before. I've been in other relationships (as mentioned above) and am looking to possibly go into a new one with a new lovely bloke. Now I've noticed whenever we have house parties and we're all a little tispy, my friends always trying to cuddle me or trying to hold my hand etc.... We chat online a lot and if I say brb and don't return for a while, he'll text me, asking where I am, what is taking me so long- why did I say brb if I wasn't coming back. All my friends and I went to a fest recently and all crashed in tents and despite the fact I had a tiny tiny 2 man tent and there was 1 person sleeping in the humungous 6 man next door, he complained and complained outside my tent at 3am, and then whilst I opened the door to speak to a different friend, he leapt in my tent, curled up and went to sleep, waking up in the morning with "Thanks for letting me stay last night" even though he invited himself in. Simarly with the msn thing, if he sees me around college or town, he'll hold a grudge about me saying brb and not coming back, despite me explaining why I didn't return.
I've told him about this new guy I like and he's said "Oh I think you'd be good together" I also mentioned my ex who I am very very close to and am great friends with and he just ran him into the ground with insults and foul language.
What is going on with this guy? Do you think he's wanting/hoping for more than just a friendship? He's constantly saying how he hates the way guys treat me (some of my friends can act bang out of order when they're drunk and stoned) and yet the next day, despite seeing me pushing these guys off and telling em where to go, he's at my throat saying that I must enjoy it , as though I deserve what I get-yet at the time somethings happening he makes himself scarce and comes back when I'm feeling shitty and angry about blokes! It's like I'm being watched or I have some duty to him with this msn crap and how he's trying to be defensive about blokes and if someone tries it on, he's at my throat about it. What is this bloke after? Whys he acting like this? I wanna be friends with him because we get on so well, but it's tiring competing with him bitching at me just for not returning to msn and if I make a mistake about a bloke, it's rubbed in my face.
Sorry it's sooo long!!
Malt xx
0
Comments
Like he is the best thing for you & he's waiting for you to drop your guard or wake up & realise that he thinks he's some what superior to the other blokes you've been going out with.
.:Crispy:.
Maybe once he realises if he keeps acting this way he will end up losing you, he will buck his ideas up and realise what a nob he is being.