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Am I leading him on?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
OK.. I was at my friends house on friday for his 18th birthday. The other people there varied from good friends to acquaintances to people i didnt know at all. Now i got fairly drunk and was with one of these acquaintances, he was hugging me and we were talking then we sat down together and he was like holding my hands and kissing me. Now i was NOT reciprocating these movements and i then said "dont im way to drunk to do this" and he said "dont worry so i am" and ignored me. Now nothing more happened than kissing and stuff, me still telling him not too, but i was teetering on paraletic, i then gave him my msn and we've been chatting. I don't fancy him, and don't think i'm giving that impression, but i wanna make sure, i'm not leading him on am i? His friend(whose party it was) did ask me about him at the end, and i said to him i didnt like him, and barely knew. But dont wanna say that to the actual incase it looks big-headed. Hmmm.. confusedsion.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes.

    Don't kiss people you don't like or allow people you don't like to kiss you. There's no respect in that, not for you or for anybody.

    Now, can we all move on?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He sounds more like that he's forcing himself on you, but you do need to make sure the boundaries are clear and unbreakable, mostly for your own sake.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kermit
    He sounds more like that he's forcing himself on you, but you do need to make sure the boundaries are clear and unbreakable, mostly for your own sake.

    :yes:

    Girl_gunner, so much of that reminds me of me, im too worried about upsetting people to say exactly what im feeling sometimes.

    Talk to him on msn, clear the air, just so he KNOWS how you feel. Steer the convo round to the party, apologise for what happened (not that you need to) but say 'sorry about that.. we were both very drunk it shouldnt have happened' that way he knows you regret it (hopefully)

    It sounds to me like you wernt leading him on, he was just choosing not to hear what you had to say. Short of slapping the guy, what could you have done to make the point clear?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oooh!! I did this!!

    What you need to do, is:

    Get the guy you fancy to pretend to be your bf. Then the guy you fancy gets to see what it'd be like seeing you, while the guy you don't fancy gets the message!!

    I'm now with the guy I fancied :D

    Nomi
    XxxXxxX
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by ginner
    Yes.

    Don't kiss people you don't like or allow people you don't like to kiss you. There's no respect in that, not for you or for anybody.

    Now, can we all move on?


    Disagree there, people do things they don't want when they're drunk.

    And when another person is drunk, they can be very forceful. I've been there and it was more than a kiss.

    So don't say you shouldn't allow it; sometimes you can't do anything but.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ok i made the point to him today that my feelings are nothing more than friends :) all is good :D thanks for the advice. im glad i didnt just carry on acting as though nothing had happened/and leading him to think we could be something more
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