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Bloody housemates

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Apologies in advance if this comes across as a vitriolic rant - I am bloody furious. I also apologise that this is so long - I have a lot to get off my chest.

I live in a house with four other girls and I have always got along just fine with three of them. One of them though is the most inconsiderate idiot I have ever had the misfortune to meet. She made it perfectly clear from the moment she moved into the house that she wanted nothing to do with the rest of us - which wasn't very nice but we just left her to get on with it, remaining as friendly with her as possible.

I could live with this arrangement except that she is extremely inconsiderate. She comes crashing into the house at 4am, screaming and shouting. She slams the heavy fire door in the kitchen even though she knows there are two people who have bedrooms next door who will be woken. She plays her (absolutely bloody awful) music all hours of the day. She never locks the back door even though we've already been broken in to thanks to her not doing it before. Her boyfriend is an arrogant pig - he has gone out of his way to alienate himself from every other housemate, having absolutely no respect for other people at all. This list goes on, but I don't have the energy.

Now I can deal with this to some extent. Even though she is thoughtless and selfish, we always tried to be nice to her. We asked her plently of times very very nicely if she would mind being more quiet and considerate, and I went out of my way to be kind to her so she wouldn't feel like she was being victimised.

Recently though, relations have completely broken down. This stems mainly around her boyfriend who has been encouraging her to try piss off the rest of the house as much as possible. They spent four hours the other night slamming the kitchen door so that they'd wake us all up, shouting. They move our things around. They took down the posters that my housemate has on her door and moved them on to mine. They're rude and abusive. They leave her music on all day on the highest volume and then go out. In short, they are fucks.

Three of us tried to have a chat with her today about it, but she wouldn't open her door to us - we could hear her giggling with her boyfriend in her room. Now it is 4.30am, and she has just come in from a club and is shouting, slamming the door and smashing my wine glasses.

For some reason they seem to thrive on conflict. It's getting unbearable - I don't feel like I can live this way any longer. We have tried to talk to her but she won't even meet with us. We can't see any other option but to meet with the Master of our college on Monday to make a complaint.

Why do some people find it so hard not to be arses? I can hear her screaming right now and I'm having to restrain myself so to not to go out there and scream at her.

Apart from complaining, does anyone have any idea of how to deal with this problem? I'm at the end of my tether.

Katie x :(

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you Aspartame for your kind words - they are much appreciated right now. :)

    Well, you will be interested to know that since I posted a lot has happened. Straight after I posted the message I could hear her outside of my bedroom door shouting, trying to wake us up. I'd put up with this for an hour and I was determined not to allow her to get a rise out of me, but it was only after I heard her trying to rip down a poster one of my housemates had put up that I went out and confronted her. I basically told her to stop, and I'd had enough. She was very drunk and started shouting, screaming that she hated us all and she was going to kill me.

    At this point, another housemate came downstairs, and drunken arsey housemate started abusing her too - shouting lots of dubious racial slurs about her being American, and then threatening to beat her up. At this point, when she was threatening physical violence I had enough and called Campus Watch, the university's security group.

    They arrived quite quickly and she stormed off into the car park screaming obscenities. One officer followed her trying to calm her down, the other stayed with us and we told him what had happened. He basically took our names and details down, and told us he would file a report which would go straight to the college Master. At this point I was quite shaken and crying, as was my American housemate, and the two of us decided to go into another housemate's room until everything calmed down. Eventually they brought her back to the house when she promised to behave, and we thought that that would be the end of it.

    It was at that point when my American housemate realised that she hadn't locked her door, and her boyfriend was upstairs in bed. Knowing how vindictive this girl could be, American girl ran upstairs to bring her boyfriend down, and lock her door. But when she got to the top of the stairs, arsey housemate was there and started screaming at her again. At this point I was downstairs, so I phoned up the Campus Watch group again.

    Suddenly American housemate and her boyfriend came running down the stairs, her hair all messed up followed by her boyfriend. We all ran into a bedroom and locked the door, just as angry housemate charged down the stairs and started throwing herself at the door, screaming for her to come out. It turned out then when she went upstairs angry housemate had attacked her, hitting her around the face, pulling her hair and scratching her. It was only the quickness of her boyfriend who pulled her out of the way that prevented anything worse happening.

    Campus Watch arrived again, and called the police. Angry housemate had fled at this point to a friend's house (although I have to question how this girl actually has any friends...) The police came and American housemate gave a statement and confirmed she wanted to press charges. The police officer then went to where angry housemate was believed to be staying so that she could arrest her, but angry housemate had disappeared.

    So effectively, we are now just waiting. Eventually, she has to come home, and when she does we are under strict instructions to call the police immediately.

    Hopefully, the university will remove her from the house. After tonight, none of us feel very safe here anymore, and they cannot expect us to live here with her.

    The scariest thing is that this girl and her boyfriend are not the sort of people to let this sort of thing go, and so I am awaiting the retaliation attacks.

    I'll continue to post what's happening.

    Katie x :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i have to applaud you for being so sensible in this situation! it's a shame things had to go so far, but in a way it was a good thing because you could phone the police and press charges. the girl sounds like a complete psycho. do you have any idea what will happen to her? (i.e. will she be kicked out of uni/accomodation).
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    We've been told that it will involve a disciplinary from the uni, and the highest penalty they can give is for her to moved to alternative accomodation. To be honest, I can't see how they can all expect us to live together now - from where I am her staying isn't even an option.

    She came back to the house this morning, so my housemate called the police. They arrived and arrested her. I was asleep at the time, so I missed all the drama, but it feels like so much tension has been lifted of the house.

    I just went and had a shower, and for the first time since christmas I didn't have to lock my door incase someone tried to get in. It feels wonderful - it's all so quiet and peaceful.

    Katie x :)
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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    I must say well done to you for staying so calm throughtout this! I would have told her to f**k off long ago!

    Glad it all seems to be sorted out anyway! Perhaps you get back to peace and quiet now!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I applaud you for being so calm and sensible- I would ahve liberate the stupid bint from her teeth long before now.

    Let the police deal with it, and press charges as fara s you can. IF the CPS won't press charges, take out a civil claim- thsi girl needs to be taught a serious lesson very quickly.

    If the university won't move her, I'd make their lives hell too- always be nagging, be as awkward as possible and ruin thsi girl's life. She fucking deserves it.
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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    If they don't move her, can you take out an injuction to keep her away?
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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    Originally posted by Kermit
    be as awkward as possible and ruin thsi girl's life. She fucking deserves it.

    Her boyfriend sounds like he needs a kicking as well.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks all for your comments all of you.

    She was bailed last night, but we don't know what the terms of the bail are yet, or if she is allowed to return to the house. She didn't come back last night anyway, and her boyfriend arrived this morning and was removing all her stuff from the house. It looks that to some extent it's all over bar the legal action - which could turn interesting so watch this space...

    According to the police she is completely denying the assault, but they do not believe her one bit. Silly girl - if I was in her situation I would be confessing all, showing as much remorse as possible and hoping to get off with a slapped wrist.

    Anyway - thanks again,

    Katie x :)

    PS. Kermit - I love the White Rabbit lyrics.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    wow.

    when i read the title i expected just the usual rant about milk-stealing and loud sex, but she sounds like a right piece of work.

    hopefully she'll be out of your hair now.

    i suggest, if they even consider putting her back with you, for one of you to have a crying fit and go on about how you're not mentally strong enough to cope with living with her, how it's affecting your work/health/social life/plants. lots and lots of tears, and as much snot as possible.

    that always works.


    also, for future reference, if you have trouble with people being loud in the middle of the night (even if they don't mean to - stumbling in drunk and such like) the thing to do is try opposite tactics, and get up every morning at 7am and be all loud outside their room. or even better, set an alarm clock for some ungodly hour in the morning, and hide it in their room. if you choose the right hiding place, you can get them up every morning for weeks, and you don't even have to wake up early :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by x katie x
    PS. Kermit - I love the White Rabbit lyrics.

    :lol:

    I've just gone and changed them too :blush:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kermit
    :lol:

    I've just gone and changed them too :blush:

    Oooh you bugger!

    My evil housemate turned up today with her family, boyfriend and Campus Watch and removed everything of hers from the house. It made me a little sad actually - that we'd got to that point. When we all moved in together I don't think any of us expected things to get as far as they have, but I have no sympathy for my now ex-housemate. The main thing is...

    ...she is gone! Yay!

    It's all so very very quiet now - I love it.

    Thank you for listening to my moans the last couple of days, and for all your advice.

    Katie x :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Woah... sounds pretty manic. Well done for keeping your cool though- I certainly wouldn't have done, I get very protective of my personal space. But it seems you did the right thing, and if they even suggest her moving back with you tell them everything you told us.

    That girl doesn't sound normal... she should be referred to someone...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well done, sounds like a very good ending!
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