How to deal with girls who can't get over me breaking up with them

awesomeminecraft6789

Hey guys again so basically I broke up with this girl and she's acting so mean about it and it's affecting me to a point we're I really don't wanna come into school and I'm with someone else now but someones crushing on me big time and I don't feel the same way but don't wanna hurt her feelings do you guys have any advice for me?

Former Member

Hi @awesomeminecraft6789 and welcome to the Mix. 

I’m sorry to hear this is affecting you so much that you don’t want to come into school. Do you want to talk a little more about what she’s doing that is affecting you? Can you avoid her at all - maybe she is lashing out right now because she might be upset? 

I’d say it’s always better to be honest so whoever is crushing on you it would be better to let them know you are with someone else and not interested in that way... do you think you could do that? 

awesomeminecraft6789

Lucy307 said:

Hi @awesomeminecraft6789 and welcome to the Mix. 

I’m sorry to hear this is affecting you so much that you don’t want to come into school. Do you want to talk a little more about what she’s doing that is affecting you? Can you avoid her at all - maybe she is lashing out right now because she might be upset? 

I’d say it’s always better to be honest so whoever is crushing on you it would be better to let them know you are with someone else and not interested in that way... do you think you could do that? 

Yes I think I could it's just I'm not confident in my ability to do most things so I'm always scared and I'm a nice person it just breaks my heart when people be mean to me it makes me feel awful and I get upset easily do that doesn't help but what the girls doing is she says oh your not talking to me what a surprise and that I'm with the girl who's crushing on me when I'm not and the thing is that girl has a new boyfriend so it really doesn't help my case I've told my tas and they sorted it but she won't stop talking about it and I'm scared that I'm eventually gonna do something stupid to myself

Former Member

Hey @awesomeminecraft6789 !

Sorry to hear you are going through this right now, but I am very glad to hear that you have been honest.

Being honest about how you feel can be extremely difficult but you have done the nicest thing. It sounds like the girl you have broken up with, is having a difficult time with being honest with herself. Sometimes when people get a response they don't like, they become upset but try to hide it with anger. This may be why she is saying nasty things to you.

If you are struggling to communicate with her face-to-face, maybe you could ask a mutual friend to speak to her on your behalf. This trusted friend could tell her that you're not with the girl that is crushing on you, full stop. 

As for the girl that is crushing on you, you could try to distance yourself from her. It can be hard to reject people, but I think it's worse to lead them on. Personally, when I struggle to reject someone, I distance myself and if they ask why, then that's a good opportunity to explain yourself. 

I hope this helps,

Let us know how you get on!

Former Member

As a girl who recently got broken up with, it's understandable that she might be upset about it. I didn't want the breakup either and my ex was very much the same in the sense that he didn't want to hurt me but really didn't want anything to do with me anymore.

I just want you to remember that you're doing the right thing and if you remain gentle but firm with her she'll eventually understand. Rejection is a tough thing to go through and the original feelings of anger and hurt do linger for quite a while, but right now what she truly needs is time and distance from you even if she doesn't quite know it yet. Please don't feel as though you're doing the wrong thing and don't fret too much about how she deals with it because we all deal with things very differently. It will take her time but she'll be okay. Trust me I'd know

As for the girl crushing on you, I'd be upfront about how you don't have any intentions with her so that she doesn't get any ideas or felt led on. What people don't often understand is that being the one who rejects someone else isn't any easier than the one who gets rejected, but at the end of the day it is your life and your happiness on the line. As harsh as it sounds, you don't owe anyone anything. I hope that helps!