Are we ever responsible for someone else's actions? *potentially triggering content*

Former Member

Hey guys,

Some of you may be aware of what happened last year - a young man was suffering with depression and decided the best thing to do would be to end his life using carbon monoxide. He got out of his truck a short while later and told his girlfriend that he was unsure about continuing, to which she replied 'get back in' and sent him numerous similar comments.

Link to article.

Instead of attempting to assist him or notify his family or school officials, she is alleged to have strongly influenced his decision to take his own life, encouraged him to commit suicide and guided him in his engagement of activities which led to his death.

After this young man had died, it seemed she was genuinely very upset and she raised a lot of money and awareness for suicide in general. That doesn't dismiss what happened though and this girl has been charged with manslaughter, is currently on bail and is due in court next month.

The majority of people are giving her a lot of hate and saying she's just a sick human being. Whilst I agree that what she did was extremely careless and wrong, I also think she must have a lot of very deep, personal issues that people should be trying to help her face and overcome rather than making whatever terrible assumptions they can. I'm interested in hearing you views on this situation if you're up for sharing?

Also, do you think this guy was absolutely one hundred percent certain he wanted to end his life - even before his doubts became incredibly clear?

Former Member

I was once told that I am not responsible for someone elses actions. But what I did may not have helped, which is kind of how I feel about this.

I have been blamed for something which was absolutely not my fault. I was not happy one bit that I was blamed for a choice that someone had made. Ok, my actions maybe didn't help; but I am not sure what else I was meant to do.

Getting back to the article - I don't think the man was in the right place mentally to make the decision to end his life,

Former Member

If you say something negative, hateful, upsetting, rude etc etc to a person there is always a danger that it will cause damage. If that comment links to an aspect of someone's life which they are sensitive about then it can cause extreme damage. Words hurt. Actions hurt. Humans are humans because they have feelings and emotions. Some people unfortunately are emotionally retarded and care very little about others and say whatever they want, regardless of consequences.

Former Member

ella! wrote: »

If you say something negative, hateful, upsetting, rude etc etc to a person there is always a danger that it will cause damage. If that comment links to an aspect of someone's life which they are sensitive about then it can cause extreme damage. Words hurt. Actions hurt. Humans are humans because they have feelings and emotions. Some people unfortunately are emotionally retarded and care very little about others and say whatever they want, regardless of consequences.

This. Well said!!

Former Member

So they world is mess of trip wires - some obvious and others all but hidden - and we're "responsible" for each and every one we trip on? This sounds an awful lot like everyone's idiosyncrasies are my responsibility.

Former Member

CptCoatHanger wrote: »

So they world is mess of trip wires - some obvious and others all but hidden - and we're "responsible" for each and every one we trip on? This sounds an awful lot like everyone's idiosyncrasies are my responsibility.

I think a lot of it lies around whether or not you can foresee the harm you cause. Walking around and consistently being a dick towards people means you hold, at least, some responsibility. If you go about your day not intending to cause harm and something innocent you say has a negative effect on someone, that's different.

Former Member

What if you're someone who wants a friend to put you down more or encourage certain behaviour - do you think this makes it right in any way on said friends part or would you guys say this would be just as bad? Does this hold the same amount of responsibility? The guy mentioned in the article, deep down, may well have wanted the words of encouragement? If that's the case, I personally wouldn't say she's 'responsible' for anything.

Former Member

To some extent, I think you've got to take some responsibility for your own actions. I've lost count of the amount of people who've blamed me for other people's mental health issues. Only to discover that at least one person has done this before, which apparently, I should have known. But difficult when no one had warned me.

One person who blamed who was a police officer and another was someone who used to work with people it's mental health issues.