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I'm so insecure

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've realised lately I have many insecurities. The main one being I never thought I cared about what other people think of me... Turns out I do and take a lot of it to heart, to the point I'm revolving around others and not myself. To the point I avoid saying and doing things so people can't judge me. I don't like talking about certain issues of mine because people might judge that...
I feel so uneasy with myself.

Comments

  • AuroraAurora Part of the furniture Posts: 11,720 An Original Mixlorian
    Hello Jazzmaraz,

    It's a positive step forward being able to realize that insecurities impact how you're feeling and dealing with day to day life. And you've taken the steps by reaching out on here, which I honestly admire as well as your self awareness about what's going on for you.

    It's difficult battling our insecurities and ways to improve it can be difficult, and a slow process, but it's about speaking more verbally to support and then you can start to take more little steps forward. It also might be worth having a peek at TheSite.orgs articles on Anxiety, and what it is, as well as improving self-esteem and confidence.

    Do you get mental health support offline at all, at the moment? Do keep us updated on how things are going for you Jazz, and remember, it's little steps forward, it may seem like a slow process, but throughout being a member on here, I've seen you take huge strides, just by allowing yourself to reach out to the community and accept support offered.

    Best wishes,
    WhispersOfTheHeart
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey thanks for the reply :)


    It really is sites like here that I feel okay just saying what I feel truthfully and putting it out there. I find it so much easier to talk to people I'm not really close with to start with. And being anonymous.

    And I do have support don't worry I'll be okay. It was a thing that was on my mind and just needed to say it. I guess more in a way or me to accept that that's what my thoughts revolve around at the moment.

    Thanks for the links I will check them out :)


    Hope you're okay xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Jazzmaraz wrote: »
    I've realised lately I have many insecurities. The main one being I never thought I cared about what other people think of me... Turns out I do and take a lot of it to heart, to the point I'm revolving around others and not myself. To the point I avoid saying and doing things so people can't judge me. I don't like talking about certain issues of mine because people might judge that...
    I feel so uneasy with myself.

    Hey there Jazzmaraz :wave:

    As WOTH said, it's a really positive step that you've been able to put things into words and begin to talk about how you're feeling on the boards. Has that helped at all?

    I've always found that insecurities and self esteem issues are very personal, although not at all uncommon. Whilst it isn't always necessarily ideal that you're revolving your life and actions around other people, that does show that you are selfless and care a great deal for those around you. Having said that, you matter too- just as much as everyone else. It's easy for me to say this and not as easy for anyone to do, but try and do something every day which is just for you. When you are fearful of judgement from other people, that can be a very hard thing to do, but it is okay. Maybe start small, for instance taking 15 minutes to sit down and have some time to yourself. Read a book, listen to some music, whatever it is that can relax you.

    Something which I have found helpful in the past is trying to balance what I might think about myself with something positive. An example might be "I hate my legs" and the balance could be "My legs allow me to walk". Very simple exercise but it can help to re-evaluate things.

    Also wanted to reassure you that you will not get judged on TheSite, so if/when you feel comfortable talking about things, there are people who will listen.

    *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have found helpful in the past is trying to balance what I might think about myself with something positive. An example might be "I hate my legs" and the balance could be "My legs allow me to walk". Very simple exercise but it can help to re-evaluate things.



    ^^^^^^^^ This

    Is bloody genius - thanks for sharing that xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ella! wrote: »
    Hey there Jazzmaraz :wave:

    As WOTH said, it's a really positive step that you've been able to put things into words and begin to talk about how you're feeling on the boards. Has that helped at all?

    I've always found that insecurities and self esteem issues are very personal, although not at all uncommon. Whilst it isn't always necessarily ideal that you're revolving your life and actions around other people, that does show that you are selfless and care a great deal for those around you. Having said that, you matter too- just as much as everyone else. It's easy for me to say this and not as easy for anyone to do, but try and do something every day which is just for you. When you are fearful of judgement from other people, that can be a very hard thing to do, but it is okay. Maybe start small, for instance taking 15 minutes to sit down and have some time to yourself. Read a book, listen to some music, whatever it is that can relax you.

    Something which I have found helpful in the past is trying to balance what I might think about myself with something positive. An example might be "I hate my legs" and the balance could be "My legs allow me to walk". Very simple exercise but it can help to re-evaluate things.

    Also wanted to reassure you that you will not get judged on TheSite, so if/when you feel comfortable talking about things, there are people who will listen.

    *hug*
    A really great reply!!

    I will reply properly tomorrow Jazz but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone with feelings like this at all.

    Keep your chin up *hug*
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